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You're welcome Nicholle! I figured it'd be nice for everyone to have a reference to come and see how someone reacted to it. I'm glad that the only true side effects I can say I've had is the Cramping. Someone did tell me last night that progesterone does cause cramping in some women. 1 of a million side effects are odds I'm ok with!
I had another lovely dream last night. Another pregnancy dream of course. 22 weeks, little girl, and I noticed her movement from the outside for the first time. I kept waking up, and it would restart when I'd go back to sleep. Not that I truly know what feeling a baby move feels like... but it was glorious. I was in tears when I woke up, I want this so dang bad!!!!
I started testing yesterday. 8dpo. We are seeing lines.. but we can't tell if we have line eye, or if there's lines. I guess we will see what the weekend brings.
To say I'm upset is a total understatement. DH will be going back to work in the next month or so... I'm running out of time for ttc in 2012. Sometimes I wonder if this is just a sign, a year off bcp, 10 cycles ttc.. and nothing... maybe we aren't meant to have more. We can't afford MA, he doesn't want to use MA in the first place.
We will be this time. I sit around and do nothing while he's working, and it's hard to get jobs where he is (since he only works 8-16 weeks in one place). So I'm staying home and going to try and get a job of my own... just need something that pays decent, we need to move next summer and we'd like to either rent a house, or buy land and put a mobile on it.
I had, it would just be too complicated since while I'm on the road I have certain obligations to DH as well since he works 12 hrs a day 7 days a week for months at a time. If I don't go, he will live in a hotel and eat take out (which the company pays for). If I was to go and have a from home job, I'd have to get an apartment, and you can't always find short term leases. And since we already pay rent back home in WI, I don't want to get stuck in a second (or third, or fourth) lease. kwim?
I also doubt I have the resolve to work at home. I'm a pretty good multi tasker, but that can be a detriment since I'd be working from one computer, and probably hitting up FB on another, or reading a book on my kindle. I mean, I can do all these things while working, been doing it for years (worked Call centers from 2005 until I got laid of in 2010)... but it'd just get worse with out someone watching me. LOL.
started spotting late Sunday, fully pink when I wiped a few hours later. I'm so not pleased. Due to the length of my pre O phase, this was probably our last shot if DH goes back to work in Oct like he has every year for the last 4 years. *sigh*
Looks like I need a new siggy, a 2014 baby is more likely at this point.
I need something with benefits. I did apply somewhere last night, they called this morning and told me they were sending me something to fill out via email. I've applied before to their Canadian ones, was offered a job but it was offered too late and my plane ticket to the US was already purchased. They seem to have decent benefits, but of course they don't advertise what they pay. I ignored the "desired salary" boxes when I applied, since I'm highly doubting they'll pay what their Canadian counter part does ($10.50per hour). But if I'm going to work a crappy job for min wage, I'd rather sit on my butt and do it than be on my feet.
Witch showed full force last night/this morning. I'm gonna try the vitex, see if I can get in an early O, then the progesterone again, I just feel bad that IF it happens, DH won't be here when I test.
I've battled with my weight my whole life. No one knew why, I was never a big eater. I found out I have Hashimitos Thyroiditis. I was good with treatment until I came to the US. I have had some troubles having someone to monitor me since coming here. I've gained between 60 and 70lbs since moving to the US.
When we left for vacation, my scale read 222.6lbs. When we returned 225.8. Almost immediately I bumped to 231.9 (my highest EVER). I stepped onto the scale this morning, after noticing my stomach isn't hurting as much at night lately (I'm sure it will now that I've said something) so I'm not eating... 220.1!! Over 10lbs gone in two weeks. So I pulled out the Wii Active and did a 20 minute exercise.. it nearly kicked my butt!
But I've had enough with being fat. I can't do anything with my thyroid right now, we just don't have the money (I'd have to break into my TTC stash, rather than just waiting and have the bloodwork run then, I do have enough meds to get me through 4 weeks until i could see a Dr after a bfp). But I'm going to do what I can.
My goal, is to lose another 5lbs this cycle. If we do not obtain our bfp This is my plan.
I'll list them by cycle, rather than month.
Cycle 12-14: Wii work outs,fitness center, and in the pool. 5-8lbs a month. In here DH and I will have started working and I will be able to get my thyroid checked and treated. I may even get insurance coverage in here.
Cycles 15-17: DH should be home, so we will be TTC again. I will aim for 5-8lbs each cycle unless a bfp happens (I will continue to exercise, but not as much). I will probably do more Wii work outs and the fitness center in the building, since the pool tends to close here for a month or so for repairs. I will have to work harder here, since DH has a sensory disorder and eating healthy is not easy with him around.
Cycles 17-20: Dh will be gone to work. I will aim for 5-8 again while he's gone. I should be able to start walking outdoors at this point, as well as being in the pool. DH gone = healthy foods for me!
This would give me a total of 80lbs lost by July 1st 2013!! Would bring me smack down to my goal weight! Not to mention should return me to a size 6 or 8! I haven't been in a size 8 since 2004!!
This would bring us right to Vacation 2013, I'd love to go home and have all the weight off, almost as much as I'd like to take a baby home (won't happen, if we have a baby next year, trip is off since we need a passport for baby and that could take a bit).
I also suspect that losing some of the weight could return my periods to normal (lighter), getting my thyroid under control, and getting my muscle tone back... may help me get and stay pregnant. I suspect I'd also enjoy a pregnancy more if I started it between 140 and 160lbs vs adding more weight to my body as it is right now.
I also plan on resuming my vitamins and fertilitea even if DH is not home. Soon as the tea is gone I will switch to just vitex tablets instead (I don't like feeling obligated to drink tea daily). I will monitor my cycles exclusively via CM while he is gone, and cm/opk's while he is home. I have no desire to return to temping, as a job for me will probably mean shift work, it's just easier to skip that part. Cycles DH is home, I will do the progesterone cream (unless I can get confirmed low levels and a Dr willing to give me something else) as well, there's no need to bother if there's no chance of pregnancy.
So that is my plan for the rest of 2012 and the beginning of 2013. Suddenly I'm looking forward to the coming months.
I haven't gotten a decent nights sleep in over a week. When we first got home from Vacation we'd stumble into bed by 1am, sleep like rocks until 11 and be good to go for the day. Now, no matter what time I go to bed, I'm taking forever to fall asleep. I finally drug myself to bed at 4am... and I was nodding off on the couch.. I'm starting to think when I fall asleep out here I should just ask to be left here. By the time I used the bathroom, brushed my teeth I was no longer tired. It's now 7:10am and I'm STILL awake. I think I dozed for 5 minutes at some point.
I already take melatonin to sleep, otc meds that help most people sleep don't help me at all, they disorient me, but not make me tired.
I know it's the change in the season that's doing it, but I can't help but be beyond frustrated. I've applied for jobs, but how the hell am I supposed to work when nothing puts me to sleep at night?
The harder time I have falling asleep, the more my stomach hurts and I need to get up and eat. I was doing so dang good with that, and since going to bed at 4 I've had: 2 slimfast, 2 granola bars and a nutella sandwich.. that's dang near a full day's calories just to TRY and sleep! I really need the job, so I can see a doctor with out bankrupting us. I'd really love to solve the stomach hurting issue, the thyroid out of whack issue and the not pregnant yet issue!
I thought it was the B6 I was taking last cycle... but apparently it's not as I'm not taking it now, and still not sleeping. UGH
Thats a great plan for the coming cycles Ashley, fab to see it all planned out like that alongside the weightloss. As you know I'm doing similar myself at the moment and am about half way towards where my doctor wants/ needs me to be for any IUI / fertility treatment. As much as its frustrating the joy i get from seeing those scales come down consistently is really rewarding (baby or not)
Sorry that your having a hard time sleeping, have you tried going for a walk right before bed to get some fresh air? I'm (and have always been) a terrible sleeper and i find if im completely stuck, that some fresh air helps a bit. On a side note, i dont eat nutella myself but if it has chocolate in it does it also have some caffeine? just a thought that might not help the sleep either..
Hope today goes ok, trying to function with no sleep isnt fun
Thank you Vicki for my amazing siggie!
I'm doing alright, I fell asleep around 11am and slept until 2. I ended up with my entire body in a full cramp at 10am so I got up, had some OJ (for the potassium) and took an OTC muscle relaxer. Apparently that did the trick. Now I feel like I've been beaten by a very large very strong man, but I'm awake. I figured I'd be witchy.. but apparently DH is taking that title today
We wanted to do a walk last night, but 1- we stay up crazy late so we'd be walking at 3 or 4am. 2- It was pouring. LOL.
I'm usually not that sensitive to caffeine to be honest. While a can of pepsi might keep me awake if I drank it right before bed, I've never had an issue with chocolate. I did have a mug of fertilitea just before bed... I wonder if it has caffeine....
Cycle 11 is a go as long as my O is not delayed. DH should be leaving on the 30th/1st.
As for the next cycle, we will have to see. I can't see DH being ok for me to make the drive two cycles, so I might just skip it and stay home, so I can get a full cycle of no genital contact for my charting. Plus, if I'm working I may not get any time off at all to go.
Well, Fertilitea does something for me, that's for sure.
This is what happened during the cycle I had my chemical. Took fertilitea, got an almost pos opk on Cd 11, positive on cd 12, and a negative in the evening on cd 12.
I'll be taking another opk tomorrow, maybe two, I only have 8 left. I have even less hpts.. but DH will be gone so I might splurge on some if no one tells him. LOL. I just told him he can't have avengers cause we can't afford it right now, he'll be mad if I buy hpts.