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Ashley's TTC #1 Journal


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  #101  
September 30th, 2012, 08:11 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Derbyshire, UK
Posts: 4,983
that sucks about DHs care, i hope you managed to get it fixed before he leaves for work so he doesnt mess up your lovely new car!

for O'ing - I hope your boobs ease off soon - i hate having sore boobs!
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  #102  
September 30th, 2012, 01:41 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Thanks Jen! The progesterone cream has eased the boob pain down to mildly uncomfortable. But I can hug people today at least.

Today we're getting DH ready to go back to work. He leaves as soon as he's spoken with unemployment tomorrow. This is going to be a long couple of weeks. Thankfully I start my training next week, so I won't have a whole lot of time to be idle!

My goal for this week however is to get my house clean. I'm going to be sore from it, but it will be so nice to have a clean apartment!!! I want at least the bathroom and kitchen done before I go back to work, and all the floors vacuumed. We look like we're living out of boxes, because they are everywhere, so by Christmas my goal is to look like we live here.
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #103  
October 1st, 2012, 09:13 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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And he's gone

Been gone 20 minutes.. I feel like someone took half me and threw it away. Can it be December now?
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #104  
October 1st, 2012, 04:03 PM
Keakie's Avatar Learning to walk in faith
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I'm sorry, Ashley. I remember the days of being apart from my dh. I wouldn't wish it on anybody; it is incredibly painful and can feel like you're missing half of yourself.
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  #105  
October 1st, 2012, 04:06 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Thanks Kayla... it's been a tough day.


OH and to top it off... I got a really awful evap on a hpt. Just my day!

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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #106  
October 1st, 2012, 04:10 PM
Keakie's Avatar Learning to walk in faith
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Ugh, I would be crushed to have to deal with an evap right after having to say bye to my dh! Sending lots of hugs. It's still early too, but I know evaps never feel.
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  #107  
October 2nd, 2012, 12:13 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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this isn't really ttc related, but since there's no one awake on my facebook to talk to, I need somewhere to vent.

DH's been gone less than a day. I have yet to be able to walk into our bedroom with out bursting into tears. I can't look at his chair, can't turn on the tv (netflix is cool, cause I watch my crappy shows, not "our" shows). The minute I look at my chat list on Facebook and see his name there.. I'm in tears.

We have not been apart more than 14 hours since I came to the US nearly 18 months ago. We like it that way.

I really have no idea how I'm supposed to make it to mid Nov/early Dec. I already dread sleeping, because I don't like to sleep alone. I don't like being alone at night in the apartment. I'd give anything for us to not have to do this, right now I'd even give up on having a child of our own.

I know that sounds silly.. but this is the thing. I grew up with a part time dad. He worked 10 days away, 4 home and repeat year round. My mom loved the money, hated the job (though I'm sure it's the only thing that kept them from killing each other). But I swore, I'd never be with someone who would be away.. and now he's not here.

I sound whiny, and I am.. but this is NOT the life I wanted... and right now, I just want my husband. The husband can't even call because his phone doesn't work where he is.. the husband who's asleep alone 500 miles away.

This sucks.
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #108  
October 2nd, 2012, 09:10 AM
Nicholle ttc's Avatar TTC our first!
Join Date: Oct 2011
Location: Ohio
Posts: 5,059
I'm so sorry Ashley! Hopefully as the days go on, you'll feel better. When my DH was away for a long time, I would cry as well.
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TTCing since August 2011
Me (33)-LP on the short side, but no other abnormalities
DH (37)-slightly subfertile morphology and motility


Natural cycles-August 2011-July 2012
August 2012-October 2012 clomid and progesterone
November 2012-IUI
December 2012, cysts from IUI, on bcp

January 2013-February 2013, long protocol IVF
15 eggs retrieved, 11 mature, 7 fertilized with ICSI
All 7 made it to 5 day transfer, 2 were transferred
Only 1 frozen snowbaby
1st IVF


May 10, 2013, lap sx, Stage 1 endo

June 2013 - MA Round 2
Femara + hcg shot
IUI # 2


FET tentatively scheduled for 10/31/13

Have never seen a bfp.






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  #109  
October 2nd, 2012, 01:19 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Thanks Nicholle. He drove the long way to run his errands today so he could call me today, he didn't sleep much either.

So far I still have inconclusive tests for this cycle. My guess is they are all evaps. I've started to get that "I feel wet.. af must be here" feeling, and some small twinges happening. Today could be cd 10 or 11, depending if I go by 24hrs post opk or 48... so really AF might be due tomorrow. I've got a bottle of wine chilling for if she does.
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #110  
October 2nd, 2012, 06:55 PM
Keakie's Avatar Learning to walk in faith
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Location: Near the land of cream cheese
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When we were apart, talking a lot and counting down the days helped. It's not the same, but it helps. Your dh's schedule sounds like it's different than what mine's is/was but we would IM on and off throughout the day between work, and then spend 1-4 hours on the phone in the evenings. Sometimes we would just talk, and sometimes we would watch movies together. "___ more sleeps until I get to see you!" was an extremely common phrase. I'm sorry.
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  #111  
October 2nd, 2012, 07:40 PM
kbpeanut's Avatar Scooter!
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I'm sorry Ashley. While I can't relate to the uber long stretch, I can relate to DH traveling. Mine is gone all the time for work, sometimes just overnight, but often for a week at a time (like this week). I think 2009 was the worst. He was gone about half of every month for about 9 months. Just when he'd get home and we'd get back into a routine, he'd leave again. Somehow, I just adjusted. I don't like being alone at night either. At ALL. I always bring one of my dogs to bed (not for any sort of protection...heck, what can a 7lb half deaf 16 year old dog do?) He can breathe in the bed next to me, and that's all I need

Course, sometimes he barfs in the bed too, which makes it extra fun.

Hang in there, I know it is rough now, but (don't slap me, I hate when people say this to me), but try and find the positives. You will be starting work, and be busy with that. Treat yourself to little things here and there. Like frozen custard. That's one thing I would pick!

Each day will be a new challenge. Be happy you are alive and that it's not Feb/Mar instead of Nov/Dec. You will get through this, both of you, and when you do, your relationship will be stronger for it.

Hang in there hun. xx
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  #112  
October 2nd, 2012, 07:54 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Yeah unfortunately communication is going to be extremely difficult. We get no cell service in Southern Illinois. He will get some at the plant (it's in Indiana).

Then I start work at 3:15, I have no idea what we get for breaks (the US tends to not give as many as Canada I hear), but he'll either be not home yet, or asleep when I get them.

So we'll be restricted to a few texts while he's at work, which he probably wont get to send more than 1 or two of cause they aren't supposed to use their phones, and he's actually going to be working in the plant, not outside moving stuff like last time.

I've resigned myself to the fact I'll talk to him Saturday and Sunday until my training is over, and then it'll be easier.. but I have over a full month of training (they keep saying 29 days, but I don't know if that means 29 actual days, or just 1 day short of a month (aka 19 days). After that I'll always be off by 6:30pm.


He told me tonight that he heard that the next two jobs are southern jobs. As in Texas and Florida jobs.. and may run from January as long as September. This is tragic for us, as he can't sweat and can't work in the south... Also, there's no way in HELL he's going that far away for that long with out me, which means quitting my new job just months after starting it, and trying to find a job down there. Well, that's not easy, and will negatively impact us at tax time (as usual *sigh*).

So now I need to find a way to kick this man in the butt and look for REAL work. In fact, I'm considering sending him looking in the North.. aka.. Canada (how Ironic?). There are jobs galore in the oil fields. My brother just got hired to drive a forklift for $21 an hour, and that's because he had no experience. DH HAS all this experience. I just don't know how the work permit/visa thing works. And despite the fact I'm a citizen, I can't go with as it will affect/push back my US citizenship which is set for 2015.

So I don't know what the heck is going to happen. I know that we have some legal stuff to look into regarding his skin, I have letters and photos to send off to lawyers tomorrow. And then just cross our fingers that something happens there.

Oh we also have to cross our fingers for the election in November. One Candidate winning would mean jobs opening in a field he wants to work in. The other would mean a significant number of those current workers flooding into the construction field making him finding work even harder.

Cross your fingers that the plant he's working on decides to do a large job this year too.. he doesn't care WHO he works for, just that he doesn't have to go somewhere that could potentially kill him.
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #113  
October 3rd, 2012, 12:08 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Started spotting just after midnight. Just like clockwork.

To say I'm upset is an understatement. 11 cycles... 1 chemical... I just don't know what to do anymore.

I figure this will be our last cycle until I can be seen by a doctor. Who knows when that will be.
__________________
~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #114  
October 3rd, 2012, 08:28 AM
wastcougr's Avatar TTCMA as of July 2014
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Arizona
Posts: 404
Ashley,

I know what you're going through now, as well. My DH and I lived 60 miles apart for all of the time we were dating, and since he was in the military, we only got to see each other for two weekends every month. And, of course, he was deployed, but thankfully, that only happened once for two months while we were together.

But I know the sense of loss after they leave. I did that every time he left to go home after coming down to visit me. It seemed like an insurmountable amount of time until we saw each other again. You'll get through this... I know it doesn't seem like it, but I believe that it made our relationship stronger.

While he was gone for two months in Kyrgystan (sp?) we had one phone call (during the entire 2 months) and about 2 e-mails per week.

You and he WILL get through this. And it will make your relationship all that much stronger.

-Christi
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OUR STORY

Me: 40, DH: 44 (He has a 15-year-old from a previous marriage)
I'm a Type 1 diabetic (27 years and counting), and I've had gastric bypass (Dec, 2013 - currently 15 lbs away from goal weight)

TTC for roughly 2 years now with no hint of success.

Started with an RE on 7/23/2014 and so far:

SA came back with 44 million, 27.3% alive
Fibroids present, endometriosis suspected
HSG normal - both tubes open

Cycle 1: August, 2014
CD 3 - 7: Clomid
CD 14: Post-Coital test (cervical cells look great, no sperm present)
CD 16: Ovulation
CD 21: Progesterone @ 12.0
CD 28: Ultrasound to check for evidence of O - present. Also determined fibroids are relatively small. Also the presence of endo is undetermined.

Waiting for AF, or + HPT for Cycle 1!


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  #115  
October 3rd, 2012, 07:55 PM
Keakie's Avatar Learning to walk in faith
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Near the land of cream cheese
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I'm so sorry about the spotting. I wish I had some good advice, but I don't. It just stinks, period.

Can Woody show his hiring managers/whoever assigns jobs medical documentation showing that he simply can't work in the south without it being severely detrimental to his health?
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  #116  
October 4th, 2012, 09:59 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Well, his job doens't work that way. He's not required to take any job with them. The issue is... if they don't do a midwest job, we live off my income since his unemployment would run out between lay off and a new job (he'd be laid off in December, and there'd be no job until October. And I'm really sure L would NOT be happy with no support for 10 months even though they don't need the money to survive (DH has no court ordered support while he's unemployed, her options were waive it, or they'd have to split the support weeks, he'd pay half, she'd pay half, since we have Reme 50% of the time when we're home).

So he'd have to pick up something that would literally JUST pay his child support and after insurance comes off, my income won't pay all of our bills.

He's down there, and he's freaking out. He's in so much pain that he's limping with each step. The water in his hotel is inferior, even with a filter on the shower head (yeah, we've spent $90 in Shower heads since August) so he's itching. His legs are swollen and purple. And he's not sleeping. He has to go buy pain meds, since all he took with him was a bottle of muscle relaxers we picked up in Canada (gotta love otc meds?) and they don't quite cut it for skin and muscle pain. I just want to bring him home, and I can't because we NEED the money. *sigh*

I did make some steps yesterday towards a potential law suit to the employer he worked for that made him sick. We'd sent letters out to local lawyers who directed us to Lawyers in Indiana... which sucks because we'd have so much travel (which is hard on his skin) just to talk to lawyers. But I hope something comes out of it. I think it'll boil down to finding just the RIGHT lawyer. I mean there are so many frivolous law suits out there, it shouldn't be that hard to get a lawyer for a real one should it?

Here's some shots of his legs. I'm trying to make them not show as photos, but rather as link, I hope this works. I wanted to give people the option to look, rather than HAVE to.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...y/DSCF5218.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...y/DSCF5219.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...y/DSCF5220.jpg

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v1...y/DSCF5222.jpg
__________________
~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #117  
October 5th, 2012, 01:20 AM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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TMI POST: This post is so tmi It's written in White text, you can only read it if you highlight the entire entry.

I feel the need to write this down so I can recall it later if I need it.

AF is wonky. Very mucusy, very painful. I feel like something is pressing down on my cervix from the inside. I assumed earlier than it was that my lining had let go yesterday, but my cervix hadn't opened until today (let's pretend it's still Thursday k?). Around 8pm I started passing clots, not un usual for me... but I don't usually get clots during my mucusy cycles.

Anytime my AF's are out of character, I take a hpt. So I get out one of my little cups and a test pee a little and stop, a few more clots come out. So I wipe myself a bit and go to start peeing again, and plop.. the cup FILLS with blood and clots. Wtfudgesticks? It's a 3 ounce cup!

I knew my periods were heavy, but I didn't realize they were this heavy.

I know that Vitex can alter your flow a bit until you've been on it a while. But while this is a wonky cycle, it's something I have experienced before, every 6 or so months while i'm not on birth control. I've just never experienced that much flow all at once, especially after having JUST passed some!

Just another thing to mention to a doctor when I finally get to see one I guess. And more reason to lose some weight, since extra fat can alter your progesterone, making your periods heavy. FUN!
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #118  
October 6th, 2012, 02:19 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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My last few cycles have been 3-4 days long. Well today is day 3.. and she's not going anywhere. So heavy!!!!!!! Ugh. No major cramps, just pain in my cervix and lots and lots of running to the bathroom for cleanups. *sigh*.

I still have no idea what I want to do while Dh is gone, if I want to do anything at all. If I take the vitex, then I'll be on AF when I drive to Illinois to see him (well, see his grandma, but I'll see him too).

I am really missing him today. he asked me a long time ago, to scan some baby pics of Reme that he has. I wanted to pack them away today, so i pulled them out to scan. I took the first one out, and behind it.. is a picture of him and his Ex-wife. I'm 100% sure he didn't know it was there, or he'd never have asked me to do it. It shouldn't bother me. HE left her. And he left her because he found me and wanted a life where he could be happier. But still.. he's gone and I found that and now my heart hurts.

that's about all I've got to say. Got soup cooking in the crock pot, don't have enough room for the noodles in it so I'm a lil cranky (it has barley, wild rice, potatoes, carrots and turnip with chicken, so it's not lacking). And I got some of my living room cleaned up. But I feel like I"m just going through motions... I'm detached somewhere.
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~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
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  #119  
October 6th, 2012, 09:25 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 26,367
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Ah dangit!!! I'm looking over pinterest and I just came across a baby announcement. And then I thought of the PERFECT baby announcement for me had I gotten pregnant this cycle.

We have 3 identical stockings, and 3 mini ones (we hang up the little ones, Santa brings the big ones, then we send them back to each other.... long story)... I could have put up the 3 big ones, and one little one and sent it out as my Christmas card! (feel free to steal this idea)!!!

Grrrrrr.
__________________
~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
Reply With Quote
  #120  
October 7th, 2012, 08:41 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 26,367
Send a message via MSN to plan4fate
I think I'm going to have to have the hard talk with DH when he gets home. I'm starting to get the feeling he doesn't want to TTC.

When DH and I met online and started talking, we had a good long talk about what we wanted out of our future. He let me go first, and agreed with about 50% of the things I said, and those that he didn't, were more he didn't agree with the order of things.

My biggest one was of course, I wanted a baby. Secondary to that were marriage, house, car etc. He wanted them all, just in a different order.

We've gotten married, we've gotten the car, we can't have a house thanks to his credit and we were working on the baby.

But certain things have been happening that lead me to wonder if he even wants a baby. He mentioned the other day, for the very first time, that he didn't want children prior to the oops that produced Reme. He wouldn't trade him for the world, and he wouldn't go back and time and changed what happened, but he didn't want kids.

Lately he's been doing some whining about how often we dtd. He would like more, like 3+ times a day more. Well not only is that not going to help my chances of getting pregnant at all, it hurts me. My body is not the same as it was before I went on the pill in 2010.. and I'm not bouncing back like one would expect. that's on my list of things to mention to a doctor the first chance I get.

He's also been taking care of himself a lot more. Let me state, I have no problem with Masturbation at all as long as it's not interrupting our sex life. But...I don't like to drop what I'm doing to be a semen dump station, regardless of my ovulation status. But rather than wait an hour or two, he'll decide to take care of it himself. Which means I either lose out on the good swimmers, or I put out when I don't want to. I don't like that he doesn't care that I'm close to ovulation and that good swimmers are a plus, it's all about him.

He has complained that he feels that he has to put out during ovulation... but his complaint makes no sense when he WANTS to have sex, just wants it on his time schedule not mine. But I seriously feel sometimes that I'm only around for my girlie bits and cooking skills.

Lack of intimacy was one of the reasons behind his divorce. But the difference is night and day. It's not months between with us, but god forbid I want to wait a few hours.


So when he comes home (if I last that long with out mentioning it) I'm sitting him down and having the talk. He knew I'd never have considered starting our relationship if there was 0 chance of a child happening. I'm now afraid he told me he wanted one, just because he fell for me before I fell for him and he wanted to do everything he could to get me.

I'm glad I have the job starting in 2 days... because I think if I didn't, I'd be leaving for Illinois in the morning to have "the talk".
__________________
~TTC #1 together 2 years and counting ~


Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew&Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel&Dee 01/19/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies
Hope 07/22/2012@4w1d, Konnor 11/24/2012@3w6d,"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6d, Ronen 02/10/2013@3w5d, Joy 07/19/2013@3w6d, "Pea" 09/06/2013@ 3w3d

Me: Hashi's, PCOS, Insulin resistant, Adenomyosis and Polyps.
175mcg Synthyroid, 1500mg Metformin
Colposcopy = CIN1+CIN2 cells
D&C/Hysterscopy/Polypectomy - August 21st - Follow up Sept 4
Him: MFI low count, low morphology, low motillity
Seeing MFI specialist/RE in 2015. Vitamins started August 2nd
Weight loss goal #1 - 10% body weight 23.4lbs - accomplished July 13 2014
Reply With Quote
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