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Tygrrlili25's ttc Journey Journal


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December 15th, 2007, 11:57 PM
tyggrlili25's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: San Diego
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Well I have this journal on another forum but since this was my first home away from home hehe I figured
I would add mine to this forum as well....

To give you some back ground: (TMI/GRAPHIC WARNING)
Im 25..Ive been married for 3 wonderful years to a very wonderful man.
I was on the pill for 9 years due to VERY irregular cycles (had af twice in one month and sometimes no af for months).
anyway after being married a couple years we finally bought our first home in March of 07 and figured there was nothing
holding us back now from having a baby. So I went off the pill to let my body get used to not being on those hormons
and I scheduled all the preconception appointments and dental appnts to make sure dh and I were fully fit and ready to be
parents. All went well and we were given the go ahead but we were not trying just yet. We had been using condoms as a form
of bc until we were ready. Well come June I was well over a week late and my cycles had become fairly regular by now so I
was wondering what the heck was going on..I made an appt with my doctor ( I hadnt thought I was pregnant but she told me
to take an hpt to make sure and the come in the following week.) I took a hpt and it was negative...so I went to go take
a shower and relax and while I was showering I felt a *POP* in my "lower regions" it shocked me a little and I put my hand down to
see what it was and my hand was covered in blood..then a very LARGE glob of tissue came out:-( I was devistated and felt helpless.
A week later I was still bleeding and I went into my doctor and she confirmed that I had m/ced..I went on to bleed for 13 days!
Needless to say DH and I were just devistated but made us realize just how badly we wanted a sticky baby of our own and we were so
ready to be parents! So we were okayed to start ttc once the bleeding stopped. We have been trying since June of 07.
------------------
I Only started Charting in August to better track my cycles and so far it is helping me out a lot. I really find it
helpful! Here is a link to my chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/PrincessTyggrlili.
------------------
~Sept 20th 2007
DH and I celebrated our 3rd year anniversary. We had gone to Las Vegas kind of for our
last Hurrah without kids and to get it out of our system laugh.gif
We had a great anniversary and perfect timing as I ovulated the day of our anniversary.
Dh and I were really hoping to get pg that cycle so we could tell people we conceived on our
anniversary and get a shirt that says " What happens in vegas doesnt always stay in vegas!" LOL laugh.gif I know corny lol
Anyway obviously we did not end up getting pg that cycle:-(.
-------------------

Moving on!
-------------------
~October 25th 2007
Month #5(Sept30)
I am waiting and waiting to ovulate..I had a head cold so my temps were not correct:-/
I think my body geared up to ovulate on cd 21 but because of the stress having to evacuate
from the fires and staying at the in laws (who dont now we are ttc) I dont think I ovulated:-(
-------------------
~Nov 1st 2007
Woohoo!!! I *THINK* I finally ovulated..its bittersweet. Its cd 33 and I am just NOW
O-ing. normally I would have been testing for a BFP but instead I am just now oing.
Oh well at least I know I am oing and not having an anovulitory cycle thank goodness!!
It took 45 days to O but I finally did it!
-------------------
~Nov 4th 2007
YAY!!! I finally got CH's So its confirmed I O-ed on cd 33! On to the dreaded 2 ww! wacko.gif
Come on BFP!!!
------------------
~Nov 6th 2007
I am feeling up and down I am so happy I O-ed but I dont think I timed BD-ing very well.
I am holding on to hope though. Ive been looking at pregnancy charts on FF
and I am seeing lots of charts timing bd the same as me so I still have hope to hang on to!
-------------------
~Nov 7th 2007
I found some quotes on Hope that I wanted to post to remind me to keep the hope:

“Hope is the thing with feathers that perches in the soul and sings the tunes without the words and never stops at all”

“Hope, like the gleaming taper's light, Adorns and cheers our way; And still, as darker grows the night, Emits a brighter ray.”

“The great essentials for happiness in this life are something to do, something to love and something to hope for.”
-------------------
~Nov 8th 2007
I am having a rough day today..the lady I used to work for (being a nanny for her two little boys) asked me if I
would watch the boys again while she heals form a surgery. So I was more than happy to do since I was really
starting to miss those little boys and I was happy to have kids around me again. So I had taken the kids
to their playgroup this afternoon..and Low and behold I was literally the only woman there that wasnt pregnant.
They were all looking so cute and pregnant:-( oh well I still have faith it will happen..if not this cycle..then
another one soon hopefully
Which reminds of a new quote I read
"Worry looks around, Sorry looks back, Faith looks up."
--------------------
~Nov 10th 2007
well..not entirely sure what the heck is going on with my body.
yesterday afternoon I started spotting at 8dpo..it stopped at around 10 pm
then started up again today around 10 am today. I dont know if this is implantation
bleeding. I dont know if IB last this long. I dont know if this is breakthrough bleeding
from having such a long cycle. I dont know if this af coming early. Im scared its AF:-(
not only because I HATE af..but because if this IS af..my lp is WAY to short!
I hate all this not knowing:-(
--------------------
Nov 12th 2007
Of course...it is just my luck. AF started today.
My LP was WAY to short. I am starting Vitex today in hopes that
it will help my cycles become somewhat regular.
I hate not knowing whats going on with my own body.
Why is it that the second you make the decision to ttc your body pretty
much says "Nope sorry im not going to make it easy..not gonna happen!!"
*sigh* Why is it so hard?? We are taught that it only takes ONE single
time having sex and BOOM your pg!:-/
At least I am now starting a fresh new cycle..hopefully this one will
bring me a blessed BFP!
---------------------
Dec 11th 2007
Welp CD 30 I *THINK* I O-ed today...*sigh* I cant believe I am having
ANOTHER long cycle. Today I went to the Dr to see what can be done about that.
She ran some test..I believe she ran a test to check my thyroid, blood sugar, and
complete blood count. Dr also wants me to schedule an ultrasound in a couple days
to check my ovaries..she thinks I have PCOS:-/ Not exactly great news. But if it
comes back that I DO have PCOS she will probably put me on Clomid and probably refer
me to a specialist. She also wants to see me back again in 2 months.
--------------------
Dec 15th 2007
I called yesterday to get my appt for an ultrasound. Its scheduled for Friday
Dec 21st. I am not looking forward to this as I have to drink 32 oz an hour
before my appt and hold it until after my appt..oh man thats gonna be hard!
Of course I am hoping I am already pregnant by then and I wont need the ultrasound
appt. hehe
--------------------
Dec 20th 2007
I tested...stupid me...BFN. I know its to early as I am only 10 DPO. It still hurts..I hate seeing those blaring white BFN's
Oh well I still have hope. AF hasnt arrived and my LP is longer than last cycle..so thats a good thing. Come on Christmas
BFP!!
--------------------
Dec 21st 2007
I had my U/S today. The tech told me I have the best looking ovaries, kidneys, uterus and everything look really healthy
just like the text books she says. So thats the good news. The bad news is now I dont know what is wrong with me:-/
I have not gotten my b/w results back as of yet. My Dr told me she would call me with the results. Now that the Holidays are
here I have the feeling I wont be getting the results for a while. Once my Dr gets the results sent to her from the U/S
tech she said she would call me and we can discuss where we go from there. Oh and AF Still hasnt come so yay *fingers crossed*
--------------------
Dec 24th 2007
Well I started spotting yesterday and today AF payed me a visit. *sigh* yet another cycle down the drain. I still havnt heard anything
from my Dr. for my lab results yet:-|
--------------------
Dec 27th 2007
AF is still here of course and she has come with a vengance Yikes! I STILL havnt heard anything from my Dr which is starting to tick me off.
I guess I should call her myself now since its been over two weeks I dont think she is going to call me:-/ ugh
To make matters worse today is the 6 month anniversary of the loss of my little bean:-( This is so depressing..I thought I would
be pregnant again my this time at least! DH gets more sad and dissapointed every month more than even me I think. Why cant I make him
a daddy? It was sad..yesterday we were watching Shrek 3..yes I know a happy movie..but when Fiona told shrek she was pregnant dh put his hand on my knee and gave me a sad look then when he put his hand on her tummy he got all chocked up:-( Ugh Come on lord help me make him a daddy!!
--------------------
Jan 4th 2008
Happy New Year!
I start this year with good news and bad news!...The good news is..I FINALLY stopped spotting on Jan 2nd. I found out I was spotting due to the Vitex I was taking:-/ Which doesnt make me happy because now I feel like I am already out this cycle. The vitex (along the prog cream) really helped lengthen my LP so now I have to hope and pray the prog cream alone will keep it long enough to sustain a pg if I am lucky enough to get pg this cycle. More good news..I FINALLY got my lab results back (After waiting for the Dr to call me for 3 stinkin weeks) I finally called her office and of course she was to busy to actually talk to me so I got to talk to the receptionist who knew next to nothing. She told me that the Dr had sent me a letter with the results. Which I didnt get until today! But she offered to read me what the paper said and I asked her to. Basicly said I dont have PCOS (YAY!) and I dont have a thyroid or insulin problem (double yay!). And if I have any questions I can ask the Dr them on my next visit in 2 MONTHS!! well needless to say I was NOT happy! I was happy when she told me back in dec that she would call me with the results so we can figure out where to go from there. But since she did not call me I get to wait 2 months? UGH! I am so mad! so I am BACK to square one:-|
I dont understand why Dr dont actually listen to their patients I can tell her exactly whats wrong with me if only she would listen Grr!
On another happy note I figured out that if I get pg this cycle I will have conceived exactly 5 years from the time that DH and I had met for the first time I think that would be just so incredble. Such a gift! I continue to Hope and Pray of course that THIS is my month!
*****
Lab results:
CBC:
Glucose - 95 - range 65-110
BUN - 11 - range 8 -18
Creatinine - 0.8 - range 0.5 -1.5
GFR - >60
Sodium - 141 - range 135-145
Potassium - 4.2 - range 3.5-5.0
Chloride - 99 - range 97-107
Bicarbonate - 30 - range 24-31
Calcium - 10.3 - range 8.8-10.3
Bilirubin - 0.4 - range <1.2
Total protein - 8.5(*) - range 6.0-8.0
Albumin - 4.1 - range 3.5-5.0
AST(SGOT) - 26 - range 10-45
ALT(SGPT) - 20 - range 10-45
Alkaline Phos - 82 - range 30-130
****
Hemogram
WBC - 9.3 - range 4.0-11.0
RBC - 4.78 - range 4.00-5.00
HGB - 13.9 - range 12.0-16.0
HCT - 42.2 - range 36.0-46.0
MCV - 88.2 - range 82.0-98.0
MCH - 29.0 - range 27-31
MCHC - 32.9 - range 32-37
RDW - 14.7 - range 10-15
PLT count - 305 - range 130-400
MPV - 7.8 - range 7.4-10.4
****
THS Sensitive - 3.45 - range 0.35-5.50
****
pelvic/transvaginal ultrasound -
Impression:1. Unremarkable pelvic ultrasound showing no radiologic evidence of PCOS. Text book ovaries of a 20 year old.
--------------------
Jan 20th 2008
Whew its been a while since I updated this...
not a whole lot to add..I am in a sever state of confusion Well I ovulated earlier this cycle..earliest since last August! What confuses me so much is I have NO idea wether I ovulated on cd 19,20 or 22!!! yes FF has given me 3 potential O dates depending on what info I add or take away. Oh SO confused..so I have no idea when to expect AF this month or when to test. Oh well I have my BD-ing covered so I guess if I dont get af by Jan 24 I wait until Jan 27th. I have my next appt scheduled with this Dr on Feb 12th so I guess if I am not pg this cycle or the next I may get on Clomid HOPEFULLY if my darn Dr actually listens to me this time! UGH! Why cant TTC be EASY??
--------------------
Jan 23rd 2008
Okay I feel like a FOOL! lol after all the complaining I did about my Dr not putting me on Clomid and her not listening to me..I am really glad she DIDN'T put me clomid because...Ladies and gentlemen..I tested this morning..I figured out which date I O-ed on and I am 12 DPO today...
and I got my wonderful, fabulous, amazing, much wanted,needed and LOVED and Adored this morning!!!!!
OMG OMG OMG I couldn't stop shaking, and crying. I am still in shock..after 8 long months of trying and thinking it was never going to happen..
we finally have our miracle baby! now STICK BEAN STICK!!! Mommy loves you!!
I finally made him a daddy!!!!
--------------------
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