LOL Troy!
I make my popcorn on the stove:
in a pot with a lid put 1 tbsp veg oil
put 3 kernels in and put on high heat, and when all three are popped the oil is hot enough
add 1/4 cup popcorn kernels and 1 tbsp white sugar and stir (have this stuff measured out before hand and do this step fast)
put the lid on and shake the pot back and forth on the burner for 3 seconds, then off the heat for 3 seconds, and go back and forth like this until most of the kernels are popped.
dump the popcorn into a big bowl and add a bit of salt right away and stir it up (you can add a few dashes of cinnamon too if u want)
voila! the best popcorn ever! in less steps than it took troy to make the microwave kind!! LOL I KID I KID!!!!!