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I'm ok. Met with a divorce lawyer this week, so trying to get that process started, but gosh dang it is expensive. SIGH.
I am trying really hard not to purge after I eat anymore. But I have lost 4 pounds since last Friday. This whole weight thing is a real struggle to me. I know so much of it is stress, and so much of it is that I am just not happy with myself right now. But I am going to be ok. The racing thoughts have slowed down some, thankfully.
H is back to kind of being a jerk, and he actually had the frigging nerve to ask me for money. ***? So I am just ready to get everything over with so I can cut all ties to him, and I have decided to change my last name back to my kids last name, so that I don't have his name anymore and it will be easier for school records and things.
I finally got Corey's passport today after all this time. I was kind of mad I had to go into DC and get it. There were so many people waiting in line to get one. I got lucky and didn't have to wait too long. But it's about 95 degrees here today, and so darn humid. They say it feels like 102. I am happy now to just be in an air condtioned house.
Physically I feel pretty well. Haven't noticed any changes with my new prescription. But it's only been a few days.
It is very hot here. And humid. The weather is doing a number on me. I think we might go swimming later today if I can find the energy. Overall I am doing okay, I think. I interviewed for a job a week ago and still waiting to hear something. I sure would like a full time job during the school instead of subbing. Sure would be nice. I need the money.
Mentally I am okay. DH pissed me off on Tuesday night. We have been working on the house for the last two weeks. The house is really a mess and it is not going to happen overnight to clean it. I had taken the girls swimming and when I got home my dh was being a jerk. He had thrown a whole bunch of my stuff out by the road. And then he told me to get out of the house. I told him I refuse to leave since it is my house too and I wasn't going to have him bullying me into this.
He said several things that were hurtful regarding my illness. Said I use it as a crutch. That my depression is all in my head. Yea right David... It is all in my head. That if I would lose the weight my arithritis would go away and the crohns would be better. Well then why is it that I was diagnose with the Crohn's when I was 104 pounds? Explain that to me dh.
Well I better go. I have stuff coming out of my air condition vent.