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I read your post in the other thread, but I figure you need your own thread.
Welcome here. Congratulations on your son, Luc's birth! I'm so sorry it wasn't what you wanted or planned for, though. My first child was born at 27 weeks due to my severe pre-eclampsia/HELLP. She spent a LONG time on the vent and it was over a month before I got to hold her for the first time. That was the HARDEST month for me. Of course, she was tiny (1lb 10ozs) and had really really crappy lungs.
You said your son was born at 35 weeks, first that is awesome that he was able to spend so much time inside of you. He probably will not have to be on the vent long. Once he is off of it, ask every nurse who cares for him, every time you are there if you can hold him. Some are more apt to let you try than others.
Usually the nurses and doctor's will tell you to not expect them home before their actual due date, but MOST children come home well before that. It depends on the complications and such.
The NICU is hard. One step forward and three back sometimes, but then, little by little, he'll make strides and then leaps and before you know it, he'll be at home with you.
Welcome to our board. Jump in with any questions you might have!
My son David was a 35 weeker. He required Oxygen for several days. The first few days that he was in the NICU the only place we could touch him was on his diaper, we were even told not to talk to him as it would stress him out.
Thank you so much ladies for the kind words and advice. I went to check on him this morning and they said they needed to put him on an oscillating ventilator, as it would be a little gentler on his lungs. I know it's supposed to be better for him but it makes his little body vibrate. They also said he may have an infection somewhere but they are trying to figure out where and what caused it. I told them I had gotten sick with bronchitis the week before I delivered and I am wondering if that had something to do with it.
I hate sounding like a paranoid, new mom but how are you not supposed to feel guilty?
I wish I knew how to help you not feel guilty, but honestly, I don't know a single NICU parent who didn't struggle with that feeling. That, and not feeling like a "real" mom because you can't do "real" parenting things for your kid. For me, it helped to know that it was normal to feel that way, that a lot of other parents experience those feelings too...but it never fully took the guilt away, or made me feel like a "real" mom.
My husband went to see Luc this morning since I have been too weak physically since last night to go. He said he looks alot better today, blood pressure and all levels are improving and his oxygen was able to go to 80% rather than 100%. His blood pressure meds are down to 3. He was able to touch him and rub his head... They said it doesnt show signs of a bacterial infection so most likely there is a virus and those results should be back today or tomorrow. Overall he's doing better.