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Why do i feel like this? Is this normal?


Forum: Pregnancy Loss

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  #1  
May 12th, 2009, 12:44 PM
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I lost my baby a week ago my first loss. I don't even think i knew what was going on, i was in shock. But anyway's is it normal to feel like this was my fault somehow? I feel like i did something that day to case it. Or something is wrong with my body i know there are many reason why i could have lost the baby. But i cant help but thing i had something to do with it. I have a feeling im going to have a hard time dealing with this.
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  #2  
May 12th, 2009, 02:57 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
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Location: Littleton, CO
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Yes, I think it's normal. I think that we all felt/feel guilty. After all, what's a mother's greatest responsibility but to protect her children? But...it's really NOT your fault. There was nothing you could have done. You did nothing wrong. You love and wanted your baby.

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Last edited by Brittanie; May 12th, 2009 at 04:54 PM.
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  #3  
May 12th, 2009, 04:44 PM
missy123's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Yes it is normal to feel that way. I am so sorry for your loss.

I blamed myself for the first few weeks.
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  #4  
May 12th, 2009, 06:37 PM
rebeccabaltimore and more's Avatar (rebeccabaltimore)
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Totally normal. It's been 3 months and I still blame myself. DH is really frustrated.
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  #5  
May 12th, 2009, 08:19 PM
momof8lopez's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: illinois
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It is human nature to try and blame someone or something for the loss of a baby. The easiest person is you because we carried them and it was our bodies that let them go. Please know that these are one of those things that you had no control over. WE have no control over when a m/c is going to happen, medicaly speaking. Hopefully you will not blame yourself for to long, but we all do in the beginning. As time passes, this blame will pass too.
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  #6  
May 13th, 2009, 03:43 AM
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I blamed myself for a little while. There was no one else to blame and I needed to be angry at someone so by default that left me - my rational self knew that it was not my fault but I still WANTED to blame myself.

It's not your fault, but I think it must just be a normal part of the grieving process to go through this feeling. It helped me to have a big cry (which I needed).

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  #7  
May 13th, 2009, 08:50 AM
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Yea i think thats what i need a big cry.Im sure it will come when i hold me Nephews or see the new baby.
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  #8  
May 13th, 2009, 03:50 PM
lmunoz8517's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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It is normal. Its been 3 months and i still find myself blaming myself sometimes.
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  #9  
May 13th, 2009, 04:30 PM
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I think it's totally normal. While my brain knows I did everything right, my heart hurts so it is easy to blame my stupid body! Sometimes I hate my body for letting our baby go, but I know there must have been a good reason. I'm only two days out so I can't say when it gets better, but I have faith it will! You'll be in my thoughts and prayers!
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  #10  
May 13th, 2009, 06:23 PM
..Penelope..'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Canada
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I believe that it's normal, and that we all experience the feeling of guilt.

It wasn't your fault, honey, and there's nothing that you could have done. I know that it's hard to believe, but it's true.

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