Log In Sign Up

Emily Dickinson poem that helped me so much...


Forum: Pregnancy Loss

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Pregnancy Loss LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
May 26th, 2009, 09:41 PM
MandyRS's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 2,555
I just blogged about this poem... you can click below if you want to read my thoughts on it. But generally, I think this is just an amazing poem about grief and really altered my perception of "levels" of grief and helped me stop secretly comparing my grief to others. I hope some of you find some comfort in it as well.

'Tis good- the looking back on Grief-
To re-endure a Day-
We thought the mighty funeral-
Of all conceived Joy-

To recollect how Busy Grass
Did meddle- one by one-
Till all the Grief with Summer- waved
And none could see the stone.

And though the Wo you have Today
Be larger- As the Sea
Exceeds it's unremembered Drop-
They're Water- equally
__________________
~Mandy~





THANK YOU to *Sharon* for my perfect siggy.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
May 27th, 2009, 05:05 PM
..Penelope..'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 10,777
To be honest, I don't really understand it I'm not good with all that Shakespearean stuff (Even though I got high marks on it in high school )
__________________




Missing our angel baby since Feb 7, 2009

Visit
BeaMade for unique, adorable, high quality handmade crochet hats and booties, velcro free soother clips and soft sole baby boots.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
May 30th, 2009, 10:10 PM
MandyRS's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 2,555
Duh... I am so oblivious sometimes in my lit dork haze... I'll provide a little analysis (my own of course, and not by any means 'the last word').

The way I see it, the poem is basically a narrator reflecting on grief that she once experienced. She starts by saying it is good to look back on the day that the grief began, because in one way, its behind her now. Even though she thought then that she could never feel joy again, now (however much time later) she knows that she has the capacity to heal and move forward with her life.

The second verse is more difficult. I see it as imagery- the grass around a tombstone being like people gathering around or fixating on a source of grief. But like grass grows taller in the summer sun and eventually obscures the tomb from sight, in the same way, good things in our lives eventually take precedence over our grief and we sometimes even forget its there.

To me, the last verse is looking at going through grief yet again, or looking at a new source of pain. It kind of draws comfort from the past, because the narrator now knows that she can get through it, AND at the same time, she's reminded that her past grief is never really gone (which IS comforting, in an odd way). Even though the new grief may feel stronger (larger as the sea), the old grief still matters (the drop). She comes to a recognition that there is no 'size' when it comes to grief- the sea is made up of drops, and raindrops are drawn from the sea. Basically, its kind of the "we're all in this together" kind of realization.

To me it was a comforting thought of how futile it is to try and 'compare' one grief to another. I love the last line: They're Water- equally. The image also brings to mind the ebb and flow of pain that we ALL go through in life, regardless of the source. And reminds me that we NEED to be there for each other, to give each other the freedom to kind of 'dump our bucket' of grief into the sea, and be acknowledged for it. We don't need to go diving into the sea to try and separate out everyone's portion to determine who has more.

KWIM? LOL... maybe I'm weird. But finding stuff like this is a huge comfort to me.
__________________
~Mandy~





THANK YOU to *Sharon* for my perfect siggy.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
May 30th, 2009, 10:43 PM
Brittanie's Avatar just me
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Littleton, CO
Posts: 43,523
excellent analysis. I also like that last line. I actually see a lot of people comparing themselves to me, being that I cohost this subforum where predominantly losses are early, and mine was so much later.

I truly don't believe my pain is any worse than anyone else's. It's just...different. In the end, we all hurt.

__________________
Thanks to Vicki... for the siggy! My kids' blog Cora's blog


Reply With Quote
  #5  
May 31st, 2009, 07:03 AM
..Penelope..'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Canada
Posts: 10,777
Wow! I totally understand it now! That poem is great. Thank you for sharing!
__________________




Missing our angel baby since Feb 7, 2009

Visit
BeaMade for unique, adorable, high quality handmade crochet hats and booties, velcro free soother clips and soft sole baby boots.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
May 31st, 2009, 07:32 AM
lunarmagic's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: MA
Posts: 4,037
I like that last paragraph. To me it reminds me that every every grief is just a drop in the sea made up of all our moments... they're all water, all blended together to make this tapestry that is our lives.
__________________



2 IVF babies and 1 surprise!
~*~ My Blog ~*~
Reply With Quote
  #7  
May 31st, 2009, 01:16 PM
ldovey83's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Posts: 7,711
That was a great poem.. I love Emily Dickenson. Thanks for sharing it with us and for breaking it down..
__________________
MY Angels: Angelbean5-28-09 Stickybean8-13-09 SweetAngel6-1-10 Raindrop8-13-10Surpriseling10-20-12
Reply With Quote
  #8  
June 1st, 2009, 01:19 AM
MandyRS's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Mississippi
Posts: 2,555
I'm so glad I'm not the only one to find some peace in those words... I really love Emily Dickinson.

I don't think any of us are completely guiltless of comparing our losses to others, regardless of when and how they happened, which is why I love it so much.
__________________
~Mandy~





THANK YOU to *Sharon* for my perfect siggy.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
June 1st, 2009, 04:25 PM
AtomicMama's Avatar CopperBoom!
Join Date: May 2008
Location: MI
Posts: 14,681
Thank you SO much for sharing the poem and your anaysis. It really is wonderful! I love Emily Dickinson in general, and that poem was very moving.
__________________
Amy: Wife to my Handsome Husband Mommy to my superhero, Max (3) and Luckiest Bonus Mama to Sammy (5)

Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 10:47 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0