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I was in dollar tree and heard a song not really related to babies it was aerosmith I don't want to miss a thing....and it made me thing of my babies I'll never see here on earth. I tried to talk to dh and he's sad for me and he gets that I miss them, but Im sure he doesn't feel as I do. it doesn't help that
dh wants to avoid for the next 2 yrs. so knowing when my edd's come up this fall...........is really hard......feeling like I'm ending my babies years on back to back losses is even harder.
I thought I was doing well. but I guess I'm not at all.
M/C 6wks 4days Jan09 & 4wks 5days Nov 05, 3/25/09dnc[10wks 3d]Jan/24/2010[11wks baby stopped growing at 7+ wks]
Little things trigger my emotions. I have learned over time not to even bother telling dh. Sure he's always been a good listener and comforted me but I don't think he gets it. I'm so completely tied to my baby that I still ache fro her. I know he has grieved our loss but in so many ways he doesn't feel the same way I do.
I don't think they ever completely feel the same as we do.
I love that song! It totally makes me think of Autumn. I still cry when I hear certain songs. So many things remind me of my angel, and of losing her.
Don't be hard on yourself, hon. I've learned that grieving may be a process, but it's never one that's totally in order. You can go from grief, to anger, to numbness, and then right back to square one so fast, no matter how long it's been.
We will probably be WTTC almost 2 years, as well. I understand feeling like waiting is making it harder to move on.
I can't really talk to DB about the way I feel about Autumn, either. I think it's because he was involved in the pregnancy in such a different way then me. I'm so thankful that I have you ladies
Missing our angel baby since Feb 7, 2009
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I think it is harder for us because from the moment they are conceived we are supposed to protect them and we are much more attached early on. My DH was really sad but he deals with things differently. At least that is how it seemed to me. I am glad to have found someplace I can come and talk to others who understand. It has helped me alot.
I think it is harder for us because from the moment they are conceived we are supposed to protect them
I totally agree with this. When I lost Cora I felt like I had utterly failed her.
As for the "thinking you were doing so well, but you aren't" thing...well...it ebbs and flows. Sometimes it is really intense. Sometimes it's easier to push away. This is normal. Please don't think that there is something wrong with you.
Look at the Mourner's Bill of Rights in the Comfort Spot. It's a great read, and it tells you so much about what is "normal" for grief.