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I'm sitting here in the dark alone and crying...I've been trying so hard to keep myself together because it doesn't do anyone any good for me to feel like this. I know in my heart that this is a selfish hurt that I'm feeling, that my babies are in heaven. They never had pain or disappointment or sadness, never sinned, they are prefect. I keep praying that this pain would subside, and no one really wants to talk about this, but I want to talk... I have to get this all to stop running thru my mind, and by getting it all out I feel better for awhile anyway. But no one really wants to hear and watch someone fall apart. My husband comes home in a week or so from overseas, and the last thing I wanna do is cry all over him...
Well, thanks for reading this if you got this far...
I am so sorry you are feeling so alone. You can come talk to us anytime. We are always here. It has only been a month, you have to give yourself time to grieve and you have to allow yourself to have these emotions. You lost your baby, your dreams, a lot of things. You have every right to cry, be angry, vent, talk, and cry some more. I would do that alot with my first though. Sit at night while everyone was asleep and just cry. It hurt so much. I didn't want to burden my family, but really I wanted to talk to someone. Its hard when no one understands. You are always welcome here so don't feel bad about posting. It helps us all not feel so alone.
I'm so sorry you're feeling like this, but it's completely normal. It's not selfish and you don't have to beat yourself up about how you're feeling. People deal with pain in different ways and grief in different ways. Let yourself cry it out if that's what you think you need, there is no shame in it.
I hope your DH coming back will help. You can talk to us all you need to.
- 03/28/10 09/'10 06/'11, D&C July 20 Apr/'12
I am so sorry that are going through this. Just know that you are not alone. We are hear for you to listen. It has been almost 6 weeks since my loss and I still cry almost everyday. I mainly cry in the shower when noone else is around. It's so hard when nonone around you really understands and most people get uncomfortable when you talk about your loss so I just don't talk about it. Tried to talk to DH about it but he just doesn't seem to want to talk about it. He always listens but just doesn't have much to say.
I don't post here often, but I know how you feel. Everyone grieves in their own way and it's normal to do so. Your babies were real to you and when they passed, a part of your heart went with them. I know you can get some solace from the fact that they felt no pain and are in a better place, but that still doesn't mean you can't miss them. Give yourself time. Things will get better and your babies will always be with you. Never feel bad for crying and missing your babies. Just wanted you to know that you not alone.
Sharon - Mom to Theresa, Harvey,& Sarah
Thank you ladies. It's so nice to be able to talk to people who understand. My husband and I and planing to build a support group for other couples going thru this. We decided that there are so many others Trying to deal with this and it's really sad how we all kinda suffer in silence. My husband is such a wonderful man and I know he would be such a help for other men. Our situation was a bit different b/c we were far enough along that we got to hold our babies and for him that made it real for him. Made it easy for him to understand my pain and grief. I really hope that we will be able to do something with our losses, that God has given me a purpose, a reason why I have so much sadness.