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  #1  
May 7th, 2012, 09:58 AM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Hi ladies, I was just thinking it seems kind of quiet on here lately, and I wondered how everyone is doing. We heard from a couple ladies recently, but I wondered how the rest of you are, what your latest struggles are, and how you're feeling? Anyone want to share/vent/update us?
Thanks
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  #2  
May 7th, 2012, 10:31 AM
.:Shortcake:.'s Avatar ♬♪Music Soothes my Soul♪♬
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I'm doing okay... It's getting closer to my first EDD and it's hard to believe my baby boy should have been 3 in June.
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  #3  
May 7th, 2012, 11:24 AM
Belita's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by .:Shortcake:. View Post
I'm doing okay... It's getting closer to my first EDD and it's hard to believe my baby boy should have been 3 in June.


My friend is starting her biweekly appts and just had her baby shower and it's reminding me that I should be approaching that point, too. I'm so grateful for this baby, but it's just so hard also that I'm finding out exactly what I missed with my Gabriel. I'm finding out exactly how much a new pregnancy and new baby does not replace what you lost. When I first lost Gabriel I was comforted by thinking that he was getting strong and his spirit would come back to me. I'm finding that now that I'm pregnant again I am having a hard time feeling that way and feel like this baby does not have Gabriel's spirit.

I only have 32 days left of work! My head is still tender from my multi-day migraine so I'm trying to take it easy still.
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  #4  
May 7th, 2012, 04:09 PM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by .:Shortcake:. View Post
I'm doing okay... It's getting closer to my first EDD and it's hard to believe my baby boy should have been 3 in June.
Sorry to hear it, Katie. That must be hard to think of those milestones and imagine what that little baby would have looked like. I really hope I am pregnant by the time my EDD rolls around...I know it will still be sad but it will at least give me something to look forward to.


Quote:
Originally Posted by Belita View Post
I'm so grateful for this baby, but it's just so hard also that I'm finding out exactly what I missed with my Gabriel. I'm finding out exactly how much a new pregnancy and new baby does not replace what you lost. When I first lost Gabriel I was comforted by thinking that he was getting strong and his spirit would come back to me. I'm finding that now that I'm pregnant again I am having a hard time feeling that way and feel like this baby does not have Gabriel's spirit.
Aww, I'm sorry Belita. I kind of felt like that from day 1, that the baby I lost would never come back to me. Sorry that it's hitting you right now.



Last night I dreamed that I was pregnant and at the same time was with a friend of mine who was having a baby. Got to hold her little girl...interesting that it was a girl, too, because I wanted Little Bud to be a girl. Anyway in my dream I was probably less than 5 months pregnant but then was worrying about having a m/c because my stomach was going down...I guess that's sort of just my thoughts about worrying for the next pregnancy before it even happens. I'd like to say that my dream means I'm ready to be pregnant again, but I know that's not true. Life is just not right for pregnancy yet, plus I'd have to get the all-clear from the MD to get off the coumadin. We'll see!
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Last edited by EverydayJoy; May 7th, 2012 at 04:12 PM.
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  #5  
May 7th, 2012, 05:11 PM
Belita's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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awww, that is a bittersweet dream.

One day last week a girl in my DDC posted that she had a dream she was pregnant with two babies at the same time but they were not twins. Within a day or two I had a dream that I was pregnant with two babies. They were in the same sac and same uterus. They were clearly different gestational ages and not twins. They were pushing each other and antagonizing each other like siblings do. The gestational age difference between the two was the same gestational age difference as Gabriel and Bowie would be. I think it was my subconsious wishing I could have both my Gabriel and my Bowie.
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  #6  
May 7th, 2012, 05:25 PM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Aww
Yours was kinda bittersweet too. It's sad isn't it? The could-have-beens and the wishes and dreams...
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  #7  
May 8th, 2012, 04:55 AM
.:Shortcake:.'s Avatar ♬♪Music Soothes my Soul♪♬
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Belita View Post


My friend is starting her biweekly appts and just had her baby shower and it's reminding me that I should be approaching that point, too. I'm so grateful for this baby, but it's just so hard also that I'm finding out exactly what I missed with my Gabriel. I'm finding out exactly how much a new pregnancy and new baby does not replace what you lost. When I first lost Gabriel I was comforted by thinking that he was getting strong and his spirit would come back to me. I'm finding that now that I'm pregnant again I am having a hard time feeling that way and feel like this baby does not have Gabriel's spirit.

I only have 32 days left of work! My head is still tender from my multi-day migraine so I'm trying to take it easy still.
Yay for only 32 days left I hope you head continues to feel better. I know everyone always says that when your pregnant again it helps with the pain. I think that it helps dull the pain but does not take it away. I know for me that every day is a painful reminder of what should have been.

Quote:
Originally Posted by EverydayJoy View Post
Sorry to hear it, Katie. That must be hard to think of those milestones and imagine what that little baby would have looked like. I really hope I am pregnant by the time my EDD rolls around...I know it will still be sad but it will at least give me something to look forward to.

Aww, I'm sorry Belita. I kind of felt like that from day 1, that the baby I lost would never come back to me. Sorry that it's hitting you right now.

Last night I dreamed that I was pregnant and at the same time was with a friend of mine who was having a baby. Got to hold her little girl...interesting that it was a girl, too, because I wanted Little Bud to be a girl. Anyway in my dream I was probably less than 5 months pregnant but then was worrying about having a m/c because my stomach was going down...I guess that's sort of just my thoughts about worrying for the next pregnancy before it even happens. I'd like to say that my dream means I'm ready to be pregnant again, but I know that's not true. Life is just not right for pregnancy yet, plus I'd have to get the all-clear from the MD to get off the coumadin. We'll see!
Thanks dear! Edd's are really hard. I know that for me I thought they would get easier with time but in reality they haven't at all

I know sometimes dreams can be bittersweet. I hope that when you get pregnant you can enjoy the pregnancy (even though it will be hard).
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  #8  
May 8th, 2012, 07:01 AM
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I've been pretty good this week. My 5 year old had her dance recitcal this past weekend and my grandparents and aunt and uncle came to visit. I haven't seen them for 6 months, so it was really nice to have family here.

It will be two weeks this Thursday since my D & E. I have been up and down. One of my best friend's had her third baby last week. I went to visit at the hospital. It is hard to look at the baby and not think about my little ones.

But on a positive note, my oldest daughter had a dream about rainbows the other night! So maybe it means we will have our little rainbow baby soon!
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  #9  
May 8th, 2012, 06:43 PM
EverydayJoy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Wow, Aimee, I commend you for visiting your friend's baby in the hospital. I wouldn't have been able to do it, it's really hard to see someone with a healthy baby after you lost one (or two, as in your case).
I'm glad your daughter had an encouraging dream though! Fingers crossed for you and your future rainbow baby(ies)!
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  #10  
May 9th, 2012, 03:51 PM
Belita's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Aimee, I also commend you for being strong enough to go to the hospital. I hope your daughter's dream means that your rainbow will come soon!
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