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I am 21, engaged and pregnant with my second blessing.
I have always had my faith, grew up in church etc. I never stopped belivieving in God, I never stopped praying but I'm not serving God like I should be. I had a very hard childhood, I went into fostercare, got pregnant at 16 and moved in with my boyfriend ( now fiance).
We've been to church a few times since starting out life together but have never commited.
I feel so guilty everyday knowing that I am not serving God like I should be, that my family hasn't been built up with Christ.
It's like I don't know where to start.
It's so sad, my 4 yr old knows nothing about God or church, and its my fault. I can't continue this way.
I just backslid I guess you can say and am having a hrd time finding my way back.
My fiance is a believer, but not motivated to take action I guess.
He works very long hrs and had a very labor heavy job, when I mention going to church he says he's just too tired. He wants to rest and have his Sunday's free. I'm afraid he'll never want to commit to going.
Both of us seem to always find a reason to keep going the way we are and making excuses. Like I don't know what church to go to, it's hard walking into a church you've never been. Our family doesn't have church clothes and it would be expensive buying 4 nice outfits for church for all of us. My fianceis too tired. Just excuses like that.
Then the times we have gone, we enjoy it but dont enjoy the feeling that we are living a double life, if that makes sense.
You can't be half christian, ya know.
We have so many habits that are hard to imagine giving up, especiall being that we are so young. Like we don't know what kind of movies/tv we can watch, what music we can listen to.
I feel like I'm rambling now but I was just hoping I could get some advice from you more seasoned christians.
Thank you in advance.
Hello there! I think it's a good start that you're here, for sure! If you're really committed to wanting to be back in church and have your children attend, you just need to decide that it's a priority in your life and do what it takes to get there each week. As far as the church clothes go, you can get by just fine with what you already have, probably. We don't really buy special clothes for church except for my husband's slacks and a new dress for the girls every now and then. There are plenty of guys who go to my church in dark jeans and no one even gives them a second glance. Also, many churches are getting more casual anyways. I usually wear slacks and a nicer shirt since I'm breastfeeding anyways. I wouldn't like to try to lift up my whole dress to nurse my baby. If you're really worried about getting "nice" clothes, there are lots of nice second hand things on ebay or at second hand stores that I bet you could find.
If your finace doesn't want to go to church, you can't force him but you can still take your kids. Your little boy really needs to get into a Sunday School class regularly so he can get to know some other kids. This is probably the best way for you to make some friends too. Many churches age grade their classes so you would be in with other people of your age. For your first time going, find out when the mid-week Bible study is held and go on that night or maybe try a Sunday evening service...they usually have less people in attendance and it's not so intimidating.
Let us know how your search for a church goes. I hope you'll stick around so we can get to know you. I'm Stacey, BTW. I'm glad you found us.
I'm sorry to hear about your situation, but I think Stacey is right. It's hard to get back to church, especially when you haven't been in a while. Your son should benefit from a Sunday School class. You and your fiance would definitely benefit from worship service. At least be thankful he's a believer. You don't have to struggle with that.
I wouldn't worry about what clothes you wear to church, I wear jeans and a t-shirt to service sometimes. It's not about how you physically come to God, but that you come. I will be praying for ya, that you find a nice place to go, where you all feel comfortable.
Hello! I am Jessica, one of the co-hosts here! My husband and I were exactly where you are now, when we were 24! I know how you feel. Let me make a couple of suggestions: 1. I understand it is expensive to buy new clothes. But there are options, like the girls said...wear what you want to! Or, you can go to a thrift/consignment shop and find some great deals on cute clothes as well. Then you aren't forking over a ton of money for something you will probably only wear once a week! 2. Go to different churches! Try them out, test the "waters" so to speak. You will find one that you feel totally comfortable with. I would agree that you should make sure it has a Sunday School program or Children's Church program for your son and future child. I think that this is vitally important!!
YOU can go to church without your husband! Once he sees you dedicating yourself to going, then HE will want to join you! I wish you luck in finding your way back to God. Know that He is always with you, loves you and will help you find your way back to Him. Best wishes!