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  #1  
October 3rd, 2009, 09:22 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: UK
Posts: 23,138
I need some prayers.....






For our marriage unfortunately :'( This breaks my heart. I don't know what to do except pray. I don't like feeling like this.

Were to begin??
Let's see.....

DH doesn't treat me as how I feel I deserved to be treated. He used to treat me like a Queen. I felt loved, special and like his wife. Now I feel like a maid, roommate and nanny. It seems the only thing he cares about is our son. All his attention, happiness, etc go into/towards DS. I'm thankful and glad he's being a good father, but he's neglecting his role as husband and our marriage.

I've talked to him about it MANY times, but he doesn't get it. He always says "i'm sorry I'll do better" but doesn't follow thru.

We only see each other 3 hours every night and that's about it, were all we do is sit and watch TV. He works 9-8 everyday. We have one car and he takes it to work so I don't have to go back out and wake up the baby.

(The last time I felt like he cared, liked, loved me was 3 months ago, when we went on our first date since DS's birth. But I only felt that way for like 2 hours and then it was over and he was back to his normal ways. I did not fall inlove with this man, the man I fell in love with was someone completely different. A strong Christian (that's a whole other story, so we unfortunately don't attend church anymore and we couldn't due to his work and one car), the sweetest gentleman ever who told me the sweetest things that made me feel loved and happy. I could feel and tell he loved me. He would give me butterflies. We had a spark. Everytime he'd look at me I'd smile.....that all has changed. I know marriages get rough and kids change them, but I thought that being a family would make us closer and stronger and happier but honestly it's quite the opposite.

I really don't know what to do anymore. But this is breaking my heart....I don't like feeling like this. I try so hard to do anything and everything to make him happy and show him I love/care for him.

Thanks for reading my novel....
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  #2  
October 3rd, 2009, 10:07 AM
~InHisHands~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Oh, Lindsey, I'm so sorry! I will def pray for you!

Have you tried the Love Dare? If not, I really think you should consider it. You'll learn a lot from it about love & marriage & even how Christ wants our marriages to be. We just finished doing it in the private sub-forum above but I plan on leaving the sub-forum up there for a while so if anyone wants to join in they can. If you want to do it I'll be checking it daily, as I get on, so you won't be alone. Anyway, if you want to do it online let me know & I'll send you the password (if you don't already have it) or of course you can always buy the book & do it on your own too!
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  #3  
October 3rd, 2009, 12:53 PM
MountainMomma's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'll definitely be praying. I understand your how you are feeling to an extent. I think sometimes, just the stress of parenting, work, marriage.....just life in general can catch up to us. There has been some strain on my marriage recently too. I am actually just getting ready to start the love dare myself, so if you want to do it too let me know and we can work through it together!
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  #4  
October 3rd, 2009, 12:56 PM
~~Katrina~~'s Avatar My other car is a TARDIS
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You will be in my prayers.
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  #5  
October 3rd, 2009, 01:11 PM
*Pamela*
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Lindsey, I remember you from the other boards and always admired your strength. I used to be UK mum on ttcal.

I'm really sorry you are having to go through these feelings. I know a baby can change things and usually the first year is so tough. I know you talked to him about your feelings but have you opened the door to let him express his feelings? I was thinking about the Love dare too and in my introduction here acutally asked about it and found some of the answers.

I pray you guys can work through and will keep you in my heart.

Bye the way, your baby is gorgeous!
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  #6  
October 3rd, 2009, 02:27 PM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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Location: UK
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Thanks everyone! I appreciate it. Yes I need to finish the love dare

I also talked/emailed with him again and I think he realized he had his priorities wrong. I sent him this link Is Your Marriage a Priority? not sure if he read it but I think he did So we'll see what happens when he gets home.
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  #7  
October 3rd, 2009, 08:44 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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will definetley be praying for you.as you know ive been there too
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  #8  
October 5th, 2009, 04:14 PM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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thanks Melissa! I'm sorry, what did you do or what helped??
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  #9  
October 5th, 2009, 11:21 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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nothing has helped completlely to be honest. we had a huge argument tonight and the kids were so upset. i've tried the love dare.i do EVERYTHING for him and he still continues to put his family before us.i dont mean to hijack your post at all i just want you to know im here to talk. i really truly hope it gets better for you fast because it really sucks feeling like that!
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  #10  
October 6th, 2009, 10:28 AM
*Mrs.T*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm so sorry you're having a hard time! DH and I have been through some very hard times but by finding a new and very close relationship with God we have gotten to a point that we are better than we have ever been. God can really open your eyes to so many things! I feel amazing and my marriage is just undescribable, I wish everyone could feel as I do. I really have no one to thank but God though. You are doing the right thing by praying and I will definitely say a prayer for you. Good luck, I hope the email made him realize what he's doing.

I also wanted to add that even if you can't make it to church you could have Bible studies with your family and pray together each evening.
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  #11  
October 6th, 2009, 10:42 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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Location: UK
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Sorry Melissa I know how you feel, no worries on hijacking my thread

Thanks Mrs. T. We used to do that every night, devo's and prayertime. But we don't....I try to get him to with me but he won't. (i'll make a post about it in the private forum)
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  #12  
October 6th, 2009, 01:41 PM
yahtzeecat1981's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Oh big hugs Lindsey! I too felt like I could relate to much of what you are saying. I know that I felt like our marriage had changed after Micah came along...please know that I will be praying for you, Simon and Zane! Big hugs again!
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  #13  
October 6th, 2009, 07:08 PM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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thanks Sara!
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  #14  
October 7th, 2009, 09:35 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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posted a thread in the hideway about it
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  #15  
October 7th, 2009, 01:31 PM
Mega Super Mommy
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i think i've asked before but can someone send me the password?
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  #16  
October 7th, 2009, 01:45 PM
~InHisHands~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: US - Alabama
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Quote:
Originally Posted by israelsofiaplusone View Post
i think i've asked before but can someone send me the password?
Just PMed you...
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"Never confuse acceptance with approval. Without approving
all we do, Jesus accepts all who come to Him." ~
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  #17  
October 8th, 2009, 12:38 AM
CameraLinds's Avatar Zane & Jude's mama
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Posts: 23,138
Wrote another thread in the hideway.
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  #18  
October 8th, 2009, 06:25 AM
yahtzeecat1981's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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responded to you for the second one..
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