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I woke up this morning after tossing and turning and 'brewing' all night long and I'm having a REALLY hard time trying to honor my husband today.. We had a 'talk' last night. We had a rare moment where we had nothing to do last night and he just wanted to cuddle which was also very rare. But instead of just laying down and enjoying it I decided I wanted to talk... I wanted to talk about what happened when we separated because we've never really talked about it.. and then I wanted to talk about when we're going to have a baby because he's never really given me a time frame he keeps saying 'eventually'. And it wasn't good enough for me, I wanted to know WHEN so he told me that he wants to finish our house first and get a nicer vehicle for me to drive and I said "So do you think it'll all be done in a year?" and he laughed and said "No, all the things we need to do first will cost about $40,000." And it felt like a slap in the face, my jaw dropped and my eyes filled with tears. We aren't hurting for money but THAT IS A LOT OF MONEY!!! AND He just bought a 'toy' vehicle that needs a lot of fixing, which I'm happy he has a little project to tinker around with but that means money is going to get 'distracted' so to say and if we do things his way it'll be YEARS before we even think about TTC and I'll be 27 in February and I just want a baby so bad! He said he knows I want a baby so bad and that I'm concerned about having kids at an older age but he wants what he wants FIRST and I just feel like he's being so selfish.. And to top it off he got upset that I wanted to talk about money and why and when and etc instead of wanting to cuddle, so I felt bad and I really do because it really IS rare that we get to just lay quietly together... SO: I woke up this morning just hurt and angry and feeling that he's being so selfish. He even asked me what was wrong and I brushed it off and said it was nothing because I feel like talking about it would get me nowhere. I feel bad that I ruined our quiet time and upset feeling like he's not really considering my feelings on the baby issue... My initial feelings this morning was to come into work and just rant and rave and vent to all my friends about what a jerk my husband is... but then the Lord pressed upon my heart the Proverbs 31 woman and I recalled Proverbs 31:23 "Her husband is known in the gates, When he sits among the elders of the land." That woman HONORS her husband instead of rants about him.. So I feel 'better' but I still feel upset, so I'm asking for prayer that I continue to remind myself of this and honor my husband today...
Raean, 27 - single mom to Chloe (1.31.03) & Savanna (8.26.05)
That was wisdom not to share at work. To often couples make up after a disagreement and others are left mad at one of the disagreeing persons. Shows genuine honor and love for your husband (even if you're having a problem "feeling" that honor right now).
Married 8/11/90 ~ Terry Bechor m/c'd 11/26/03, Thomas A. III m/c'd 7/15/04,
Sarah E. born 6/24/05, Tabitha Zipporah m/c'd 4/?/06, Theodore David m/c'd 8/27/06,
Taylor Lynn m/c'd 2/07/07, Benjamin E. born 3/25/08, Catherine A. born 6/03/09
This sounds like a hard thing to not think about. I am praying he will come around soon. 40,000 sounds like alot before you can even think of having a child. I remember when Daniel was about 2 yrs old, I wanted another but he wasn't ready and told me when we buy a house and Daniel was potty trained. When those things happen, he still wanted to think about it. I said it wasn't fair and month later we started TTCing. I hope he can come around soon.