How do you forgive someone who has been very mean to you (this is putting it nicely), when they don't apologize or even ask for it?

[brightmommy]

I think you have to look at it in a way that the forgiveness is really for you and not for them. You are letting go of the situation whatever it is and not letting it be a black spot on your life or effecting the way you think/view something. Don't let the actions of another disrupt your life or your feelings or it will fester and boil over into hate.

Brightmommy, that's just what I needed to hear. Thanks for your insight. I'm almost 8 months pregnant and I recently had a family member treat me pretty badly...I won't go into all that was said but I'm having a rough time letting it all go. I find myself constantly giving it to God and then taking it back again. I guess being pregnant with the hormones doesn't help matters much.

[dalynnrmc]

LOL You're probably right in that being pregnant doesn't help much.

Remember that forgiveness is a DECISION - which means that it is NOT an emotion. Forgiving is something we decide to do because it's the right thing and we are commanded to do so; it's not something we have to "feel like doing" before it can be done.

Continuing to give it to God every time it comes to mind is exactly what that is about. Forgiving is a process, starting with the decision to do so, and then letting God work it out of your heart. You're doing exactly the right thing!


What does the Word say about forgiveness? How many times are we supposed to forgive? "I tell you, not seven times, but seventy times seven." Right? Forgiveness doesn't depend on the other person's action or repentance. It's our own heart attitude and deciding not to hold their actions against them - loving the sinner, even if we hate the sin.


Keep doing what you're doing and seeking the Lord over this! He will change your heart!