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  • 1 Post By mamaginger
  • 1 Post By Buggymom
  • 1 Post By Countrymom4
  • 1 Post By jeweluv

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  #1  
October 13th, 2012, 09:57 PM
jeweluv's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jun 2010
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I apoligize in advance for posting this with you guys but I have a repore with you somewhat. So, well today was tough. To sum it um, dh challenged me with some Christian questions I could not answer, said he 100% didn't want anymore children, my mom (someone who has always had this competitive "thing" with me although I shy from competition and run from it)....I've always felt I was inferior to her, let Evyn spend the day with her and then she bragged to me that Evyn now never wanted to come home and live with them. We later talked and she tried to convey that it was innocent and that she could never be me, but after all these years and knowing our complex dynamic, I know where it is at, even if she doesn't.

Well, I've been nursing for 18 months. My boobs, triple...quadroople A to begin with ....lol, now have shrunk. My hips are out there and my butt is vuluptuous. My thighs are huge and I wouldn't mind the more woman-like figure I have no as much if my boobs were still part of the picture; at least then I would feel the curves had their place. Big hips, thighs, butt, no boobs...to me, I don't feel as feminine. I've always been pear shaped and now even my tummy, bc lack of attention, has rolls upon rolls even though I try to hide it. I know these things don't matter and I know that in GOD's eyes and even in my heart, if I can bear children with my body that is what is beautiful and even if I couldn't, being a woman in the eyes of GOD is different then in the eyes of society. After hearing from dh that my being a mom again is slimmer than slim and not feeling good enough to the children I already am a mom to, I am left feeling I have this body I'm less than comfortable with and have still not earned my "mom title." =(*

Cry =(* Can I crawl out of of my skin now? It's 1 AM and dh is having a night out and I am sitting here watching "Knocked Up" and dreaming of chocolate in the night and more babies.
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  #2  
October 14th, 2012, 06:40 AM
mamaginger's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Awe Erica....I'm so sorry....

Is your husband initiating all of these Christianity debates? If so I think I'd just tell him I didn't want to discuss it anymore. If you are initiating then I would definitely stop for a time. Just because he is rejecting everything right now (God and kids) doesnt mean that wont/can't change so don't let it discourage you for the future.

Your mom shouldn't have said that to you at all. That was just wrong. No one could ever take your place even if you were a horrible mother. Children still long for their mamas. You are a very loving and protective mom. They are blessed to have you.

Girl....we all have our body issues. I wish I could take two or three cups from my bra and give them to you!! I have the complete opposite issue....small legs, thighs and a flat butt with huge boobs and flabby belly. Shirts never fit me right. Anyway....all of this is just an attack on you from the devil. Fight him by quoting scripture out loud. I can give you some later. I also recommend you reading the book "Captivating". I may have mentioned it already but it talks about how and why Satan specifically hates and attacks women. It was one of the best books I've ever read. I wish all women would read it.

So...exactly what kind of a "night out" does your husband have without you?
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For you created my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb...I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made...My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together...Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. Psalm 139: 13-16

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  #3  
October 14th, 2012, 07:13 AM
Buggymom's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Ohio
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We are here for you anytime so don't feel bad!

I agree with Ginger...you've done what you can for your hubby. Now you be an example and continue in your faith and prayers for him. He could come around on his own time...on his own "journey" of faith that he may not even be aware of yet. I think sometimes, men in general do not want to be "taught"....so don't. It could push him away. Just focus on your relationship with God and teaching your children (if hubby has problems with that....you could say "In a Godless World...it certainly can't HURT to teach morals and how to have a giving and forgiving heart to our children".). We'll all be praying for you...sometimes it takes something huge for someone to turn to Christ (although, I hope he changes heart sooner than that). I'm going to reccomend a book that I love...it's called the Resolution for Women.

As for your mom....sometimes people just don't think before they say things. Please, try not to let her get to you...she knows how to push your buttons. I think we've all been there with feeling inadequate (sp?).

Oh my gosh...none of us are perfect!! My boobs are too big and not where they used to be, lol. I can't stand my legs...short and chubby with cellulite...I can't stand wearing shorts, they are that bad....no matter what I do because I exercise. My belly after c-section is a hanging mess...I did all I could there and have given up on that after 5 years of working on it. Personally, I don't watch a lot of tv and I don't buy into magazines because sometimes fake models and movie stars will make us feel bad. I try to look at real people everyday. Nobody is perfect....except teenagers, LOL...and the occasional mom that just has good genes or something.
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  #4  
October 14th, 2012, 08:20 AM
Countrymom4's Avatar Chrystal
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Location: Saskatchewan, Canada
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I understand where you are comming from...I too would have liked more children. I have always had great pregnancys not sickness and not a strechmark to tear. I am made to have babys

P.s. I got no boobs either.
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  #5  
October 14th, 2012, 08:53 PM
jeweluv's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Thanks ladies. . I know I could watch my diet more although I am already a health nut. I simply don't want to take more time than 3 days a week for only 20 min working out. Lol. Boob donations welcome! I feel like if I'm gonna now have the curvy woman body then I should have the other major woman gals to match. Lol.

I talked to my mom last night and she completely back peddled and made excuses and I let her. I didn't want her to be upset or worry.

Dh is def coming to me with lil Christian arguments but I am doing and starting it too. I'm gonna force myself to step back.
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