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Not getting DS baptized


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  #1  
August 7th, 2006, 12:42 PM
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I'm not a reigious person. I was raised catholic and don't really care much for their beliefs. I have been trying to find a church I like so DS can grow up going to church. Anyway, I havent found a church yet, but I have made the decision to not get DS (10 months) baptized. My reason for this is, though I don't live by the Bible 100% of the time, I feel like baptism is from the Bible, and since the Bible says a person should learn about God before getting baptized, I think I should wait until DS learns about God and decides to make that decison for himself it thats what he wants to do.
Well I'm just really mad/sad right now bc I told my mom about it and she freaked out, she even told me that something's wrong with my head, and almost hung up on me.
She's catholic, but she rarely goes to church and doesnt even pray to Mary and all those things catholics do, so I dont see why she's getting so mad about it. I knew she wanted me to get DS baptized, but i didnt think she would be this upset if I decided not to.
My mom and I have always had a good relationship, and I guess im just in shock that she treated me like this and basically called me crazy.
Oh well, he is my son so she's going to have to deal with it bc im not changing my mind.
Has anyone here been through something like this?
Sorry for venting btw, i just think its sad the way she talked to me .
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  #2  
August 7th, 2006, 01:36 PM
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no where in the Bible does it state that you have to have an infant baptised. Baptism is done as a symbol of you choosing to wash your sinful self clean and rising up as a new person. It is done to people who are ready to choose that Christ is their Savior and that they acknowledge that they are sinners and that they need His salvation to wash their sins away. Babies cannot make that choice for themselves for one, and yes they are born sinners, but they were born into sin, they themselves have not yet sinned....they have nothing to be cleasnsed from.....does this all make sense?
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  #3  
August 7th, 2006, 02:03 PM
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We're maybe a little different in our church, we do infant baptism, and when you are older you do public profession of faith. The infant baptism is not just about the baby, it's just as much parents promising to raise the baby in the way of the Lord.

Sorry your mom reacted this way, but I think you are making the right choice. If it's not something you stand completely behind, then don't do it just because your family expects it.
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  #4  
August 7th, 2006, 02:23 PM
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we do something similar too #5, we call it dedication though. It does not have anything to do with water or anything though....we did that with my son. We gave our son to the Lord and the church made a vow that they would do everything they could to keep our son spiritually fed as well.
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  #5  
August 7th, 2006, 02:47 PM
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We don't baptize infants. But we do dedicate them to the Lord, and really it's about us, the parents as well when we do that.

We go before the church and the pastor prays over the baby and the parents. We vow, not out loud, but in our hearts, to live Godly before our children and raise them as the Lord would have us to raise them. Teach them right from wrong and such.

Every denomination is different though. We are Baptists.

I don't really have a problem with babies being baptized, just as long as it's not symbolizing the child getting saved/accepting Christ.
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  #6  
August 7th, 2006, 03:00 PM
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We dedicate at our church. Our DS will be dedicated in September.
We are pledging to him before the church and God to raise him in the way of the Lord.
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  #7  
August 7th, 2006, 03:07 PM
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Quote:
We don't baptize infants. But we do dedicate them to the Lord, and really it's about us, the parents as well when we do that.

We go before the church and the pastor prays over the baby and the parents. We vow, not out loud, but in our hearts, to live Godly before our children and raise them as the Lord would have us to raise them. Teach them right from wrong and such.

Every denomination is different though. We are Baptists.

I don't really have a problem with babies being baptized, just as long as it's not symbolizing the child getting saved/accepting Christ.[/b]

Once again, Heather and I are on the same page! I am a baptist as well and we dedicated our son on Christmas last year. Basically that just means that we will raise Aiden in a godly home setting an example for him.

I am glad that you made this decision, and I am proud of you for sticking with it. It will be hard for your mom to understand coming from a catholic background, but she has to realize that you need to make your own decisions.

Good luck!

xoxoxo
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  #8  
August 7th, 2006, 04:23 PM
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I can "hear" the hurt in your post. I'm so sorry , i'ts so hard when we don't parent the way our parents want us to. I htink they feel a loss of control or something. For what it's worth, I htink you're making the right decision. You dont' want to set a precedence with your son by doing a ritual that you're not sure you believe in. I think that is a fine example of how important a relationship with God is; I'm wondering if this is speaking volumes to your Mother and making her feel shaken in her faith?
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  #9  
August 7th, 2006, 07:28 PM
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(((HUGS)))
I am sorry your mom hurt you. I am glad you made your decision and stuck to it.
I am baptist and we do baby dedications...
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  #10  
August 7th, 2006, 10:44 PM
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Quote:
I can "hear" the hurt in your post. I'm so sorry , i'ts so hard when we don't parent the way our parents want us to. I htink they feel a loss of control or something. For what it's worth, I htink you're making the right decision. You dont' want to set a precedence with your son by doing a ritual that you're not sure you believe in. I think that is a fine example of how important a relationship with God is; I'm wondering if this is speaking volumes to your Mother and making her feel shaken in her faith?[/b]


I agree - I think you are making the right decision. I actually have a Catholic background, so I understand your mom's perspective even though I don't really agree with it (I too attend a church that believes in baptism when one accepts Christ - we dedicate our children). As the ladies pointed out - when dedicating a child to the Lord (be it through a child dedication or actual baptism) a lot of responsibility is placed on the parents - they are vowing to raise the child in the faith - as you are not fully committed yet, it would lack the meaning behind the ritual and just be a ritual.
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  #11  
August 8th, 2006, 07:26 AM
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I agree with these ladies. You are making the right decision. I am also Baptist, and we also dedicated our daughter, but no baptism.
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  #12  
August 8th, 2006, 05:48 PM
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Thank's everyone. If I find a church I like, I would do a dedication. It sounds like something really nice. As for my mom, she hasn't called me back, but once she gets over it, she will.
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  #13  
August 8th, 2006, 07:08 PM
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Like someone saidabove it may have something to do with the fact that it made your momma look at herself and realize her shortcomings with her own faith. When a child does not walk in the same shoes as their parents do sometimes it hurts....But you are absolutely right in what you are doing, you know what is best for that baby right now and go with it!

Also I just wanted to bring up it may scare her too that you are not going to baptise your lil one. I know many catholics who believe that babies will not go to heaven with out being baptised and those I know that believe that it scares the crap out of them when their loved ones choose not to baptise....

But once again you are doing the right thing, and like you said she will eventually come around. Keep up the good work and standing for yourself!
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  #14  
August 8th, 2006, 07:57 PM
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I've been through that. My DH's family is VERY Catholic, his uncle is a priest! We chose not to get our daughter baptized and that was quite a sore point between us and their families. Overall all though, we feel as some of the previous posters do, baptism, by the Biblical stance, is a way to show your choice to follow Christ. Good luck to you! I hope you find a church that you feel at home in soon.
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  #15  
August 9th, 2006, 06:16 PM
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There is nothing I can more than what has already been said. These ladies have given you great wisdom. Raise your child in the way that you believe. It is not your mother's decision. It's your and yours alone. Your decision is not wrong...It is perfect for you and your child...I will you lot of luck and God bless...
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  #16  
August 9th, 2006, 10:38 PM
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My Husband is very catholic as well, but I just dont agree with their upbringing. He was raised in catholic schools, and I tried telling him before that I didnt want our child to be baptised... he just looked at me as if I were stupid!

I dont know how to help you in this situation, cos as you can see Im kinda going thru the same thing!

stick to your guns cos as you said he is YOUR son! best of luck!
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