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How did being pregnant after placing a child up for adoption impact you?
It seems that once I got pregnant with this little one, my healing process sped up in a huge way. I think there was a HUGE part of me that was scared that Rebecca was my only chance and I would never be pregnant again.
Also, it's so much fun to be able to truely enjoy the pregnancy, and not have to worry about getting too attached. It is weird to think that this one is actually coming home with me from the hospital though
I haven't had that opertunity yet. I do have this completely irrational fear that since we gave up our first baby we won't be able to have anymore so, I image once we actually get pregnant that will go away.
It was definitely weird... I actually had a fear of not loving my first daughter as much. Fortunately, moms have an equal amount of love for each child. I never understood that until I had more kids.
It is nice being able to enjoy each kick and milestone without fear the attachment. It was really nice taking her home with me.... but it was really hard when Iris had to stay in the hospital for her hole in her heart. I couldn't sleep.... it brought back a lot of sad feelings from the adoption.. having to leave Katie int he hospital etc.
I struggled dearly with this while pregnant with Leila. Before getting pregnant I always worried about not being able to conceive when it was time. Then when I did conceive I worried about losing the baby "because I had had my chance for a healthy newborn baby." Then when Leila was born I felt a lot of guilt about feeling such love and excitement immediately. It took me quite awhile after she was born to resolve my feelings of guilt and to be able to not be pulled apart when I happily pulled her into my arms. If you scour back through the pages on here I have post after post of feelings I boiled over with over being pregnant with Leila. i even felt depressed and upset over the kicks, heartbeat and seeing u/s pics. I wanted to be excited over them but at the same time I was angry with myself for the way they made me feel. It brought back a lot of the feelings I felt while pregnant with Olivia and it was so hard to work through such feelings while trying to work through the normal pulls of having your "first."
It really is hard. Just talk about anything that is going on in your head and heart. Cry when you need to and use this great resource to help you. HUGS! If you need to talk I am only a PM away.
I gave my older 2 children up for adoption when they were older, so being pregnant didn't affect me as much as keeping them past the ages I gave up my older 2, but I also never let the younger 2 out of my sight, I do just about everything with them, I am so afraid of missing something, even the littlest thing, and some days this makes me crazy as I just want a break, but then I get the fear that if I need a break I can't handle them and that I am not good enough. It's a struggle for me, but to be honest the joy I feel while with them makes it all worth while.