We pride ourselves on having the friendliest
and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment
for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers.
If you have any problems registering please drop an email to email@example.com.
Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!
Hi moms. I hope it's okay that I'm popping in here seeking advice. I've been dealing with a third pregnancy as of a few weeks now, I'm six weeks and some days, and after ruling out youknowwhat I have been looking heavily into placing my little miracle baby up for adoption. (Birth control pill dosage too low, anyone? lol..) I will be working with CareNet and doing serious research on adoption starting next week.
Has anyone here placed a baby for adoption later in life, after raising a child or two? I have two kids, they're still young and I'm giving them everything I have. I don't bond during pregnancy but I take up something fierce after they're born and I'm so worried that I will regret it. Forever. Even worse than a youknowwhat because I will truly know what I'm giving up.
I really hope I'm not hurting anyone by expressing my worries.. I'm in tears over this every single night because while I understand the right thing, I don't know if I could do it. I don't know if I can. I feel so afraid that everyone I know will judge me harshly because I'm not 16 years old, you know? I'm an adult, single full time working mom, with two thriving toddlers already, I should be able to handle what life throws at me. At this stage in this pregnancy I have finally felt the fear that so many women talk about. I am SCARED, absolutely terrified. Everything feels 'ruined' and all I want to do is move away for a year and come back, you know what I mean? What kind of mother raises two kids and just hands off a third one? I feel like that's what my peers, family, friends, will all think of me. It's what I think of me now.
How do you come to terms with it? How do you *know* it's better than the alternatives? How do you let go and how do you cope afterward?
I hope everyone understands and I apologize if I hurt anyone with my post. I'm so appreciative of everyone on the boards on this site and it feels better not having to go so alone.
Last edited by Aero22; April 5th, 2012 at 10:59 PM.
Reason: darn typos
Hi Aero, I wanted to send you a private message, but your PM options aren't open until have 10 posts (but you could bump up your post count pretty easily!). I wrote you on email so I hope that went through, but I wanted to offer some support and let you know that you aren't alone in this. I also wanted to give you some information on other birth moms and support groups that might be a little bit more active if you still wanted some input from other birth moms.
"I will make it through this because it is for her and for her, I will do anything. I am not brave, I am not strong, I am just Rhiannon’s mom". Our TTC/Adoption/Pregnancy Blog: Jump Over The Rainbow
I am new here and have the same fear as you do. This is my 5th pregnancy and I was a 16 year old mother and kept and raised my baby. How can I be going through this now as a 30 year old? You are not alone, I have no idea how I am going to get through this but it is comforting to know that I am not alone. I just found out last week and have been through every option multiple times and I really think this is the best option for me and my family, considering my situation.
You are not alone. I am 32 and I just placed my second born up for adoption. My oldest is 14 and I had him when I was 18 and I kept him..but at this stage in my life I knew I just wasn't ready for another child. I am also having a hard time coping with the guilt and anxiety I am carrying over my decision. If u need someone to talk to please email me. I could use a friend who understands what I am going through as well.