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  #21  
August 30th, 2010, 01:52 PM
Claysgirl's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 823
Quote:
Originally Posted by JMC1988 View Post
Hi! It is nice to have someone to share it with. I indeed do have a great realtionship with Cheyenne and her adoptive parents, Trudy and James. Cheyenne's father and I have a great relationship with her and her parents, which I think is really amazing. She has grown into such a little girl that Jesse and I look at and know we could not have done anything better for our little girl! Thanks for welcoming me here!
I think its great that you have great relationships with everyone who is involved.
And I know what you mean, I feel the same way when I see my Birth Daugther

Glad to have another Birth Momma on board with us. The board gets a little slow at times, but the ladies here are great, and always there to offer support when its needed!
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Momma to Matthew 4-15-09
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  #22  
August 30th, 2010, 09:10 PM
JMC1988's Avatar *Summer Loving*
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Location: Georgia
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I am soooo glad to be here .... to have some others to talk to about it .... because sometimes, with no one beside Me, Jesse and our parents knowing about her .... it makes me feel all bad and like I am hiding a secret .... when I acutally am not .... just wanted the best for her!
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  #23  
August 30th, 2010, 10:47 PM
BoobyDutyAgainJen's Avatar Proud Mom & Birth Mom
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Location: Massachusetts
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Welcome Jennifer! I hope you jump right in and join the board...it sounds like you have a lot to offer! You have a very uplifting adoption story!
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  #24  
August 30th, 2010, 11:39 PM
JMC1988's Avatar *Summer Loving*
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Quote:
Originally Posted by DoubleBoobyDutyJen View Post
Welcome Jennifer! I hope you jump right in and join the board...it sounds like you have a lot to offer! You have a very uplifting adoption story!

Thanks! I will try. I quite like it here! I hope so! Indeed, it is!
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  #25  
November 15th, 2010, 08:55 PM
Mommysbabybear's Avatar Veteran
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Posts: 113
I have always been an outcast throughout my life and when I found a man that wanted me I clinged to him. I got pregnant with my oldest daughter when I was 18 and gave birth when I was 19 everything was wonderful until he found someone better. My daughter was almost 3 when we split up and I was ok for a little while but I eventually turned to drugs to make my feelings go away. My daughter has lived with her grandparents since the weekend she went over there and I realized I was a full blown addict and that I could no longer take care of her. Dont get me wrong it was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made in my life. Then when she ws almost 6 I had my second daughter when she was almost a year old social services took her from me because when she was almost one I slipped up and used. She lived with a girl that ws my friend her father left me when I found out I wss pregnant and has never seen her adoption kept getting brought up over and over and as time went by I realized that she had been with them for so long she didnt even remember that I was her mother it hurt me so bad but I signed my rights over to them september of 2008 and her adoption was final march of 2009. I had my son february of 2008 he is a wonderful 2 yo I am clean and loving every day through the trials qnd yribulations of life I do not have to use it is my choice every day no to. I am now 10w 3d pregnant and even though my bf isnt my 2yos father he treats him like his own, my sons father used drugs ans I left him because of it,
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  #26  
November 16th, 2010, 08:58 AM
Claysgirl's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2008
Posts: 823
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mommysbabybear View Post
I have always been an outcast throughout my life and when I found a man that wanted me I clinged to him. I got pregnant with my oldest daughter when I was 18 and gave birth when I was 19 everything was wonderful until he found someone better. My daughter was almost 3 when we split up and I was ok for a little while but I eventually turned to drugs to make my feelings go away. My daughter has lived with her grandparents since the weekend she went over there and I realized I was a full blown addict and that I could no longer take care of her. Dont get me wrong it was one of the hardest decisions I have ever made in my life. Then when she ws almost 6 I had my second daughter when she was almost a year old social services took her from me because when she was almost one I slipped up and used. She lived with a girl that ws my friend her father left me when I found out I wss pregnant and has never seen her adoption kept getting brought up over and over and as time went by I realized that she had been with them for so long she didnt even remember that I was her mother it hurt me so bad but I signed my rights over to them september of 2008 and her adoption was final march of 2009. I had my son february of 2008 he is a wonderful 2 yo I am clean and loving every day through the trials qnd yribulations of life I do not have to use it is my choice every day no to. I am now 10w 3d pregnant and even though my bf isnt my 2yos father he treats him like his own, my sons father used drugs ans I left him because of it,
Thank you for sharing your story. And congratulations on your decisions. I haven't personally struggled with addictions, but have seen many family members struggle and I know it's not an easy thing to beat! I hope you join us here on the Birth Mom's Board. We all have different stories, but in the end all did what was best for our kiddos, and you can find a great support system here! Congrats on your pregnancy as well!
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  #27  
May 27th, 2011, 05:00 PM
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Posts: 131
Well I'm not a birth mom really. But I'm very confused what to do. Awhile back adoption was pretty much the only reason I wasn't getting an abortion. My baby isn't anything ugly or to be hated just because of his/her parents. I don't see why I should destroy it.
Now I'm not into either but I just really want to parent. The thing is I know someone else could do better and maybe at a better time I could raise a child when I'm at a better point in life. It just seems so hard to do. I know there's open adoption but I wonder if it'll ever come a time when I can get to know my him/her. I have so many reasons to place for adoption but I feel how would I make it afterwards.
A few months ago I would hang out with my boyfriend. We'd date and we both a drug problem. we were both 17. Both drop outs and neither of our families were stable. We got into fights. And I thought dewspite the fights I loved him. I never thought sex was the way to show love more I've always been emotional. However sometimes the drugs got the best and I got raped. I didn't really consider it that. I didn't want to believe it and I tried to believe otherwise. Well I had stayed away from drugs. I tried to make sure I stayed away from drugs with him tried to be in control. I really wanted it not be I wanted us to keep our relationship at least as friends. Well this time he got me pregnant resulting from the assault. I had steered away from him from then on. When I found out I was pregnant. I first wanted an abortion. But then it changed just one day thinking of my baby as a real human not something in the way. I decided to not get an abortion. And considered adoption. I got my first job and am trying to make it work. But I'm only 17 now and everyone who knows thinks I should get an abortion. I realize I'm a little too far along to abort since I've bonded and wanted to name him/her and have thought of life when he or she is born. I'm only at 12 weeks but I feel love that I know I will emotionally want to parent but adoption seems like the best thing for the situation. I called an agency. They sent me some families but I recently read that some agencies price biracial babies low. Which is why I rather leave some info out. I don't want any stereotypes or for my baby to be devalued.
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  #28  
June 24th, 2011, 07:13 PM
BoobyDutyAgainJen's Avatar Proud Mom & Birth Mom
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Your story sounds VERY similar to mine. Remarkably the same. Well, except it was an older neighbor who raped me while I was high and obliterated and then used the drugs to "make" me come back so he could do it again.

In any case, I placed my birth daughter for adoption more than 12 years ago. This summer her mom asked if I felt ready for a visit with just Olivia flying to see me. This is what I have always hoped and dreamed for when I placed her with her family. It sounds like you want something similar.

My birth daughter is biracial as well. Trust me when I say whatever deal the agency had with her adopted family financially, I could care less. I just know she has the MOST loving, caring, perfect mom for her. Even more so than I think I could ever have been. I never dealt with any of the financials and obviously never received anything, so their financial workings is on them. Try not to think of it devaluing your baby. You don't want to get attached to a family as the parents of your baby and then lose them because they had a surprise at the birth. KWIM?

If you ever want to talk, send me a PM. I may not have the answers but your age, the drugs, the rape, the biracial baby, etc are all my story as well. Let me know if I can help in any way.

Only you know where you should go with this. Do some more research into adoption agencies in the area. Read some more profiles.
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  #29  
August 11th, 2011, 09:15 AM
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Last edited by abs9264; May 10th, 2012 at 09:01 AM.
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