I am so sorry that I haven't been around. It is a HUGE adjustment actually having Kerrigan here. I try to pop in once in a while to check how things are going, but it is hard to find the time now. Anyways, here is our birth story... (I didn't reread this so I am sure there are a ton of typos)...
As you all know, I went to the Dr's the previous Thursday and had NO progress. I was having contractions but couldn't feel them (they had me on a monitor). I was eight days late and was still only one cm and no effacement. The NP stretched me to 2 and sent me on my way.
Well I woke up friday morning about 7am and noticed that I was having contractions that I could actually feel. I also had blood tinged mucous.... Nothing serious though, so I went about the day and walked, hoping that they would continue so that I wouldn't have to be induced on Sunday. Steve had to work at both jobs and we debated on whether or not he should stay home but in the end he went to work.
Later in the afternoon I started timing my contractions because I noticed that they were kinda close. They were consistently 5 min apart. They didn't last long though and were not strong at all. I DID call Steve to come home around 7pm because I knew he would need the rest if the contrax continued.... By the time he got home things started to pick up. I got into the tub and tried to listen to relaxing music. It wasn't enough of a distraction so at about 10 pm I got back out of the tub. My contrax were now in my back and 2-3 min apart lasting for an average of 30 seconds. Honestly, this made us both extremely nervous because we had about a 40-45min drive to the hospital. So even though I knew it was probably pretty early, we headed to the hospital just to be on the safe side.
I called the Dr's office and told them that we were on our way. I ended up with the "on call" midwife - Janet.... whom I had never met. Nothing like having to familiarize yourself with someone REAL quick.
Anyways, we get to the hospital and I am literally having HARD contrax 1 min apart. I thought for sure that I would at least be 4cm. When Janet checked me, I was still only 2cm and there was no effacement. I literally wanted to cry. She suggested I do some walking around the floor and told me that if my cervix didn't change, then she would have to send me home. All I could think in my head was... I am in this much pain, having contrax 1 min apart and you are going to send me HOME like this??? I did what she asked though and started walking around the floor. I think it was at this point that my older sister showed up. So me, Steve, and my sister walked... they "slow danced" with me... helping me rock my pelvis in hopes that things would open up. I also tried the birthing ball... but that only lasted a few seconds as it made my back labor worse. I was literally bawling the whole time because I was not getting any breaks from the contrax. They were still one on top of another.
Janet came in to check me about an hour later. No progress. I talked to my doula a few times during all this and she REALLY wanted me to go back home. She thought that I would be more comfortable at home and would be able to get some rest. It was now about 1am and I talked to the midwife and she told me that at this point she was not going to send me home in the shape that I was in. Steve, my sister, and I talked also and we decided that none of us were comfortable leaving when I was in so much pain, the contrax were so close together, and the fact that we lived 45 min away. Not to mention the fact that if you leave the hospital against medical advice, the insurance company WILL NOT cover that visit. We were not going to pay for all that.I mean they were planning on inducing me the next day anyways.
I agreed to accept morphine at this point. I was hoping that it would relax me a little so that my body could do what it needed to do. I also go into the tub with the jets turned on. This felt great... and between the two, I was able to relax and get through the contrax on my own. That is... without Steve squeezing my hips together. I got too hot after awhile though and got out...
Steve and my sister slept for a little while. I lie in the hospital bed just trying to get through as many as possible without them helping me.... but the morphine was definitely wearing off.
At 4am my contractions were getting really strong again, to the point that I was starting to "lose it" again. ALL the pain was in my back... I can't even describe it. Janet came in to check me again. Still no dilation, but I was 20% effaced. Now she offered me demerol. I accepted it. This spaced out the contrax. Now I could sleep a little between them. Not much, but it was better than them coming every minute.
I then was trying everything. I did lunges around the floor. I walked more. I got in the tub again. I got on all fours to try to turn the baby and stop the horrid torture of back labor. I literally did anything and everything they suggested. I even prayed that I would make it to 4 cm so that I could get an epidural.
At 3pm, now 32 hours into labor, Janet came in to check me again. ALL I did was PRAY that I had made it to 4 cm. I was now 80% effaced, but still no dilation. Nothing. I was crushed because I was in soooo much pain and I felt that it was for nothing. I did not know how I was going to get to 4cm. Then the blessed midwife told me that her and the Dr had discussed it and agreed to give me the epi at 2cm! I was so relieved!
I finally got several hours of sleep as well as my sister and DH.
At 6pm, I was finally 4cm... and at 9pm I was fully and was at a +2 station!!! I was so excited, nervous, and relieved that I was laughing. They turned everything off (pit and epi) and had me start practice pushing around 10pm. I started in a squat and felt great. ( I no longer had back labor, she had turned).They then had me lying on my back holding my knees.... that felt ok too. Then I think because of the baby's heartbeat, they had be switch from side to side. At some point, Kerrigan moved again and I had extruciating back pain. Worse than before. Steve was using his fist to push on my back, but NOTHING was helping. I finally started telling everyone in the room. "I can't do this." I was crying so hard. Everybody was trying to be so encouraging... telling me that I could do it, but I knew something had changed. Nobody believed me. I mean after all how many times have they heard women say that they couldn't do it and then they did? I was literally pleading with my doula, the midwife, and the nurses. I finally stopped doing what they were telling me to do. I just couldn't do it anymore. I was in too much pain and I was going on 40 hours of labor.
Some random nurse came in to have me try another pushing position. I told them no, that I was not going to do it. I was done. My doula started to get stern with me, when Janet walked in and said, "STOP making her push, all you are doing is torturing the poor woman."
She had called the Dr, but the Dr sensed something was not right and was already on her way to the hospital. It turns out that not only did Kerrigan change positions, but she also move back UP! She was now at a -2 station and was stuck. She wouldn't even budge when I pushed.
That is when they made the final decision that I was to have a c-section. By this time I was dry heaving, was pushing uncontrollably, pleading and crying for them to hurry. I have NEVER experienced pain like that in my life. I had not only Steve in tears, but my doula was too. I was not so nice to the staff at this point.
They finally get me into the OR and they had to take the epi out and put a spinal in... (because of all the pushing). I felt relief within 2 minutes. I have never felt so relaxed in my life. I immediately started apologizing to everyone. I felt so bad about my behavior. I mean the very last contrax, I don't know what I said but I know my voice got very low and I started to growl like Lind Blair. LOL Thankfully everyone was so sweet and knew it was the exhaustion and pain talking.
At 12:48am Sunday, 42hrs of labor, Kerrigan Ava was born, 9lbs 8oz and 21in long.
Thankfully everyone was so sweet and knew it was the exhaustion and pain talking.
I will update again soon with updated pics within the next couple days
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Birth Story (very long)
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At least you have a gorgeous and healthy little girl! How has your recovery been?
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