Did I do something good or bad?

Jennifer-Jacob's Mommy · #1 January 23rd, 2010, 06:38 AM

a few years ago, me and this girl, was really good friends, well best friends

we had a falling out over something that was not my fault....and havent talked since.. anyhow we havent talked in 2 years and with me bringing a baby into this life, itkinda brings perpectivie whats important in your life and whats not.. she has recently given birth to a boy as well to. I do miss her but I feel that what done is done now. I kinda would like to be friends , not hang out or anything but be able to say hi when we see each other, not have bad blood that is there right now.. so I sent her a message this morning on facebook...

this is what i said..

Hi ??????

me and brad want to congradulate you and colin on the birth of your son, Chance.
he looks perfect in every way and we are glad that the surgery was successful. we will
have the birth of our son in another 10 weeks so im sure we will feel the same way about
our boy as you do about Chance. Bringing a life into this world, and losing one
(We lost our first baby) really brings perpective into life, what matters and what doesn't.
I know we haven't and probably won't again( the ball is in your court), talk in a long time.
But I just wanted to let you know that im sorry for what happened 2 years ago. Whatever you
think or feel about me, I can't change but whatever happened happened and we should just put it behind us there is so much going on in the world that is so much more important then pointing fingers we don't have to be friends or anything i just wanted u tho know how i feel.I know brad has missed the friendship the four of us shared back in the day, even though we don't talk about it.To be honest, at times, I do miss it too. But the past cannot be changed only the future. As we look forward to the birth of our child, we wish nothing but the best for you, colin and baby Chance.

now the message is sent..and im actusually wondering.. did I do the right thing????

MommaLee · #2 January 23rd, 2010, 08:57 AM

I think the message is fine. Like you said whatever happens, happens - whether she responds, ya'll talk a bit more, or whatever.

I know that a friend of mine - I had known her since 1st grade - screwed me over on an apartment agreement and I didn't talk to her for 7 years! I now talk to her about once a year.....what happened is something that I'm trying to forget, but it's definitely ruined the friendship.

I think that it was nice of you to congratulate her though.

ca_dawson · #3 January 23rd, 2010, 09:11 AM

I don't think what you did was a bad thing. You wanted to clear the air and that is very mature of you. Me and my best friend growing up went off to college together and everything. I was with Ben at the time and being so far away was so hard. I knew he was the one and that I had to give this thing a chance. If we could survive being apart then we were definitely meant to be. (We met in March of my senior year, spent all summer together, then decided to do the long distance thing when I moved away. I was already set to go off to college when we met) Anyways so I transferred schools back closer to home so I could be with him. After I left her and I had a huge falling out. I was back closer to people we went to high school with and I kept hearing she was saying this and she was hearing I was saying that. Anyways we didn't speak, not a peep for 5 years. I had lived with her family the last 2 years of high school, so her dad kept begging me to call her. So eventually I did and we talked and realized that we were so mad at each other over nothing! Actually we couldn't even remember why we were mad in the first place! So now we're back to being the best of friends! She just had her 2nd son last month and I'm so happy that I was a part of her life this time around. Her older son is 3 now and we rekindled when he was a baby. So you never know what can happen. We were young and dumb and believed other people instead of just being mature adults and talking our issues out. Had we have done that we probably realized that alot of things people were saying were lies and never lost touch. Good luck to you with whatever happens. But at least you can sleep at night knowing you tried to clear things up.

Cheryl_W · #4 January 24th, 2010, 12:15 AM

IDK the situation enough to know if it truly was the right thing to SAY - but rekindling an old friendship is always the right thing to do. GL sweetie!