[amazing_love]

I feel exhausted. Sleep has not been going very well for us lately. Jimmy works so i take care of Camden by myself at night during the weekdays. When he wakes up wanting to eat I bring him into my bed and feed him there. He always falls asleep while nursing (I also do a lot of times). Well, when i try to put him into his bassinett he always wakes up recently. He'll sometimes stay asleep for a couple minutes but it seems like he somehow knows where he is and doesn't want to sleep there! And it's not just that he wakes up.. he starts crying and then screaming. He used to be okay sleeping in his bed and the only difference is i've been letting him fall asleep while BF. I'm not sure if that could make a difference. I don't like trying to put him to sleep other ways at night because it has taken me SO long at times. I've tried letting him put himself to sleep but that really didn't seem to work. He always starts screaming and i don't like leaving him crying like that. I really don't feel comfortable co-sleeping and lately that's the only way i can get ANY sleep. I'm going crazy. Sometimes i get so tired and frustrated at night that I end up in tears. I need some help! How do i get him to sleep in his own bed?

[ca_dawson]

I'm probably no help since Lexi sleeps with us about half the night. She goes down in her basinett just fine at the beginning of the night. I feed her and she falls asleep in my arms, then I keep her there and rock her for about 10 minutes until her limbs go limp and I know she's in a deep sleep and then lay her down. We do that about 9 pm and she sleeps until midnight, wakes up for her midnight feed and I do that again and she sleeps again until 3 am. At her 3 am feed I'm usually too tired to do the routine and just lay her in bed with us and let her eat and fall asleep next to me. Then at her 6 am feed she's right there so I don't have to do much, just feed her and go back to sleep until she wakes up about 8 or 9 am. She loves sleeping in her bouncy seat too so sometimes we'll put that in the bed between us and let her sleep in it. I never thought we'd cosleep either, but honestly I do whatever works to be able to function right now. We get good 3 hour stretches of sleep all night this way and I'm pretty fully functioning during the day right now. I hope you find something that works for you soon!

[fromustobaby]

Kaiden is TERRIBLE at sleeping anywhere but in the arms unless he is swaddled...he will sleep in his bassinet swaddled for about 4 hours with the sleep sheep playing Mother's heartbeat...other than that, he will only sleep in our arms...so, my suggestion would be to try the DUDU (Happiest Baby on the block) swaddle and maybe try a noise machine (I got the sleep sheep as a baby shower gift and it is the best!)...

Totally feel you on the sleep thing, K wouldnt go back to sleep after 4am last night - even when I was nursing him he was squirming all over the place...

good luck...

[karenwalter]

I know how you feel. We pretty much do the same thing as you. I am up during the weekday nights with Connor by myself because Sean goes to work during the daytime. He is still getting up every 2-3 hours to eat so it hasn't gotten much easier for me yet.

I, like you, am not comfortable with Connor sleeping in my bed. So I actually get up and go into his room to nurse him. I have a comfy rocker that I use and pretty much just feed him and put him back down. I found that if I bring him into bed with me, then he usually doesn't want to go back in his bed.

We have swaddled him since he first came home to the hospital and that is the only way we have gotten him to sleep in his own bed. So, when he gets swaddled, he knows it's time for bed. Also, it allows me to lay him down without him waking himself back up. So, you might try swaddling if you haven't already. Now I can lay him down awake after a feeding and he'll go right back to sleep.

Also, we use a pacifier and that helps him soothe himself to sleep. That way he doesn't need to be nursing to fall asleep. If he cries when I put him down, the pacifier usually works. I know people have different opinions on this but, for us it hasn't interfered with BFing at all. I introduced the paci at about a week old and it took him a few days to get the hang of it.

Hang in there sweetie. I know how hard those first months are. I've had many nights where I ended up in tears because I just want to sleep! And still have them some. It's normal to feel this way at this stage, but I hear it gets better. Just know you're not alone there are lots of people going through the same thing (for some reason this helps me feel better). Lots and lots of

[Celry]

There are a few things you can do that are life savers for some moms.
1) While you're feeding him, put a hot water bottle or heating pad in his bassinet. Take it out before you lay him in there. The warmth may help him stay asleep and get into a deeper sleep quickly so he doesn't wake.
2) Make the bassinet smell like you. You can use a shirt you've worn as a sheet, or just spray the sheet with a little breastmilk.
3) Swaddle! I know others have said this, but you aren't already doing it you need to. Some moms stop swaddling because their child doesn't like it. Most kids will fight the swaddle as you do it. If he's crying, swaddling him may initially make him cry harder, but it will calm him down. If you haven't read or watched the happiest baby on the block you should. Basically there are 5 S's to sooth a child. Shooshing, swaddling, swaying, sucking and aparently I'm brain dead because I can't come up with the 5th. Doing all five is supposed to calm any child, but it didn't always work for me. I'd suggest getting the video from a library if you can since you can watch it quick and not have to waste your time reading a book that is way too repetitive IMO.

The first few months are all about your survival. I remember all too clearly what it was like to sleep 20 minutes at a time if I was lucky. If you decide to co-sleep, just snuggle him in right next to you. Make sure pillows are away from him and do not have him sleep on you if you're going to sleep. If you aren't comfortable co-sleeping, you can take a side off of his crib, put the crib mattress at your bed level and push the crib up next to you.

[amazing_love]

Thank you for the tips! Keep them coming! I need all the help i can get. lol.

[fromustobaby]

Another thing that helped us was a warm bath before bed, he splashes around for a while, but then settles down and relaxes...

[*Mommy2Camden*]

It will get better with time Krista! I KNOW how rough it is not getting any sleep. The 1st few weeks home were the most exhausting of my life, and I even started halucinating a few times. Babies are SO used to the womb where everything is automatically given to them, then after they come out they just want to eat, eat, eat. My little guy would eat every hour on the hour ALL night & day. (Cluster feeding) It will mellow out and you WILL get sleep again!!! Now Camden goes to bed at 6pm wakes up at 11 and 5am to eat, then sleeps till 8am. My best advice for now is to sleep when he sleeps, and catch up on the weekends.

[Jodi0804]

I all too well remember those first few weeks, they are rough; its definitely all about survival! Billy would do the same type of thing to us, with waking up when we put him down, even if he was sound asleep. The first time he'd go down for the night he stayed asleep, but when he woke for his first feeding he was usually done in his crib. We ended up cosleeping for a while. I didn't sleep that well when we did, but the baby did so it was better that we both weren't tired. (And good news is that now he wants nothing to do with co-sleeping, I didn't want to start certain habits!)

Are you napping when he is? I know everyone says it, but you have to. I would eat lunch, do one housework chore, and then lay down. Most times I fell asleep, but if I didn't at least I rested.

Does he like to swing? Our swing was a lifesaver. He took amazing naps in that up until he was about 4 months (like 3 to 4 hours). We'd turn it off when he fell asleep but the upright position helped with his reflux.

I was in the same position with DH at work so I know how it is to do it on your own, as I'm sure others do too. Have you introduced a bottle yet? Do you think on a weekend DH could give him one feeding so you could get a little extra sleep? We arent able to do is since Billy won't take a bottle we do take turns getting up on the weekends since he is an early riser (DH is currently sleeping right now and baby is playing downstairs with me.) Hang in there!!!

[Lyz]

When Bella was in her bassinet, I would feed her out in the living room or in her room in the rocker because if I fed her in my bed, she wouldn't go in her bassinet afterwards and I'm not comfortable with co-sleeping either.

We swaddled from day one. Not with a receiving blanket, but with the swaddle me swaddler. It was the only way she would sleep well.

Also, her basinnet legs could be adjusted for height so we dropped two legs down a notch lower to put her on an incline and that really helped.

We also rolled up 2 receiving blankets and put them on either side of her startin them at her belly level (since she was swaddled so tight, she never moved an inch at that age) and that helped her feel secure. This might be key for you! Also, we bought the realllly soft bassinet sheets that felt almost like the minky material (super soft) and that helped keep her bed warmer at night (I wasn't into the whole heating pad or water bottle thing...I was afraid it would get TOO hot!)

lastly, at this age, its ok to rock him until he's in a deep sleep. I promise it won't affect his sleeping pattern in the coming months. When he hits about 2 months, you can start working on putting him down drowsy.

Can Jimmy help with one night? I know that when i was at my exhaustion level with Bella, DH would help me one night (even though he was working during the day) and it helped tremendously. Just a thought. HUGS Krista! The first few weeks are the hardest, but I promise it will get better

[Sam914]

Mikey is a pretty good sleeper but i wanted to say i hope it gets better! That being said..

We swaddle, so definitely give that a try if you don't. I recommend the Halo sleep sack with swaddle thing instead of the Swaddle Me blankets, Mikey can get his arms out of those in two seconds... otherwise we just have him sleep in a sleep positioner so he doesnt move and we also have the sleep sheep (my sister got it from Pottery Barn) that we put on heartbeat... he squirms around a lot and he's a VERY loud sleeper (grunts and groans all night long),but, eventually the combination of all those things puts him to sleep. Michael also sleeps well in his vibrating seat... his P&P also has vibrations but we havent used them since we dont want him to get used to sleeping for the night with it because his cribs obviously doesnt vibrate. However, if your desperate i'de try things like the swing or bouncy seat...

[KCMomma]

I totally feel your pain girl. Everyone has given you great advice. Literally, Paige slept in her carseat in front of the bathroom with the exhaust fan on for the first 2 years of her life. SURVIVAL!!!!! The pacifier, white noise and rocking of the carseat saved our lives!!

[LaLaRose3]

Everyone has given great advice. I definitely agree with swaddling- what a lifesaver! I tried several swaddlers, including receiving blankets, and the Miracle Blanket was hands-down the best! It always worked for Alice- if you havent seen it before, give it a google!

It will get easier, momma! Just hang in there! I also agree that if DH could help maybe one night of the week, it would help keep your exhaustion level down! *HUGS*

[MarinaAndCharlie'sMommy]

Everyone has given great advice. We did have to end up co-sleeping because she her first night home she started choking on her spit up in the bassinett and I was terrified to not have her next to me. I never thought I would end up co-sleeping because I was afraid of SIDS and that I would crush her, but I am always very aware of her and she sleeps so good next to me. I hope this rough patch passes quickly. It really does get better I promise!! Hang in there sweetie!

[Gray_baby]

Definitely swaddle! We have always used blankets, no special swaddling blankets or anything. There were times she would fight her way out of it even when she was only a few weeks old but she still slept better swaddled. It got to the point that after I'd BF her and then swaddle her she'd close her eyes and go right to sleep.

I know what you mean about not being comfortable co-sleeping, I just can't do it, even now that she moves around a lot and rolls over. I have only occasionally nursed her while laying down.

Also white noise is a great idea. We bought this mobile Fisher-Price 2-In-1 Precious Planet Projection Mobile - Fisher-Price - Babies "R" Us, and put on the heartbeat setting every night for her.

I can definitely feel your pain though. I've been the one to get up with my DD every night since she was born since I'm BFing (so almost 6 months now) and my DH works (and is often out of town). I can tell you that eventually you just start to get used to the getting up a couple of times per night, though there are still days I'm exhausted. It does get better though! Hang in there!

[jbhonea]

Oh, those first two months were the hardest for me. I thought I was going to lose my mind! Dh was a great help when he wasn't going to work, but there really isn't much he can do when I'm nursing. Now that I'm a little more relaxed about supplementing with formula, dh gives her a bottle at her first waking, and then she's bf the rest of the time. I've decided that one bottle and a rested mommy is the healthiest for both of us!

I never swaddled Lilah because she simply couldn't handle it. I think we swaddled for the first week. After that, if she didn't have her hands free, game over. It didn't matter how long I let her fuss, she was NOT happy.

She did sleep with us the first three weeks of her life, and I really didn't get any sleep. I was worried a pillow would smother or dh would roll over on her. So I switched to sleeping with her on my chest while I reclined on our recliner. It was the easiest because I could breastfeed her, then just move her to my chest. And honestly, that's when she slept the longest.

Then we switched to her swing. I went through tons of d-cell batteries, but the nights of 4-5 hours sleep were worth the money. She hated the bassinett, so that wasn't an option. The only problem with the swing was that we had to make a switch to the crib. That was painful. Every time I set her down, her eyes would pop back open and we'd start all over again. It would take hours and she'd only sleep for 2-3 hours. It was frustrating and exhausting. Now, she'll go down close to the same time every night and wake after 4-5 hours to eat, and go back to sleep for another 3.

My only advice is at this early stage do what you can to get the most rest for the three of you. After that, whatever you decide, stick to your guns. Switching them around is confusing for them, and hard for you.

Good luck, and it will get better. I promise!

[Oreobaby]

I'm sorry Krista, I'm not help, but I hope that you can find a solution soon and get some much needed rest!!

[amazing_love]

Thanks for all the great advice. We stopped swaddling him for a little while because he always tried to get his hands free and couldn't sleep. Now i started it again but the swaddle me isn't strong enough i guess because he's able to get his hands out pretty easily. I'm now thinking about looking into something else like the miracle blanket.

DH burned a CD with white noise and we started playing it at night a few nights ago. It was AMAZING the first 2 nights. He was quiet right away and fell asleep on his own. When he would wake up, I'd feed him and set him back in his bassinett where he'd fall asleep with the white noise again. Seriously it was awesome. BUT last night it didn't work at all! He would continue to cry even with the white noise playing. Jimmy even woke up and tried to put him to sleep with no luck. I was up with him for 3 hours before giving up and letting him sleep with me. I'm really nervous that it will continue to be like this but i guess only time will tell. I am seriously considering getting that lamb that everyone keeps talking about but am not sure whether it would be worth it.

So far he hates the swing and won't really take a pacifier. He gets mad when i try. I can sometimes get him to take it if i hold his hands and help him for awhile but then he always spits it out so quickly that i'm not sure it could really help me at night.

I'm not able to nap very well during the day but i do try to rest. If things get too bad i will definitely ask Jimmy to help a little more. Camden took a bottle the last time we gave one to him (it's still breastmilk since i pump).

[Celry]

When you give him the pacifier, angle it toward the roof of his mouth and jiggle it like you're going to pull it out. That may help him latch onto it.

I got very few naps since my kiddos never wanted to sleep at the same time. It gets exhausting. I feel like just before you can't take any more, kids decide to sleep a little and let you catch up a bit.

[Elijah'sMommy]

Just want to wish you lots of luck! Eli's had massive sleep issues since birth, up until 2-3 weeks ago when we started CIO.