MIL's

Oreobaby · #1 August 14th, 2010, 06:46 PM

How do you approach care of your baby with the MIL?

Now granted, I don't doubt that Rayanne was tired...she isn't the kind of baby that would go to bed if she WASN'T tired...however...it is 8:30 here, and my MIL just rocked Rayanne to sleep. She wasn't that cranky, although she was a little fussy. She hasn't eaten since 6:30. Now, if it was me, I would have kept her awake for another half an hour to an hour, and then filled her up, and swaddled her and put her to bed. (yes, I am swaddling her now) and she probably would have slept till morning.

Now, I have no idea when she will be up again to eat. I may just wake her and feed her once they leave? I'm not even sure what to do. My MIL is so touchy, my mom, I would just tell her like it is, and DH would just let her do whatever. But I'm frustrated, because she isn't the one that is going to have to get up with her in the middle of the night and have a difficult time putting her back to sleep.

Now I know it comes with the territory, but really...how do you guys approach baby care with the MIL?

Oreobaby · #2 August 14th, 2010, 06:53 PM

ok...so i have no idea why the picture is so big in my siggy...sorry guys!! I set it to medium size on photobucket, but it still made it big.

hearts.0nfire · #3 August 14th, 2010, 08:08 PM

Sorry you have to deal with that. Even though i'm not there yet, I would just politely tell her that you've set up a schedule and need to follow it.

ca_dawson · #4 August 14th, 2010, 08:34 PM

I really have no idea. We don't really allow people over at our house that late, which pretty much alleviates that problem. Honestly DH's mom has only watched her once for a few hours. I would probably have said something about her being hungry and took her (one of the benefits of breastfeeding! LOL!) I hope you figure it out.

P.S. I can NEVER get photobucket to resize right! I don't know whats wrong with it but I've given up trying!

MommaLee · #5 August 14th, 2010, 08:56 PM

If this is just an isolated incident and your mil is not going to do this every night, I'd let it go but if there is a next time could you just make a bottle and let her feed rayanne early?

dh's mom watches julie twice a week. i tell her what we do at home and will give her tips but ultimately, as long as she is safe and taken care of i'm fine with whatever. at night though, i'm in the same boat as carla.

MommyPoky · #6 August 14th, 2010, 09:12 PM

I agree with the above, I'd probably let it go unless it happened all the time. The damage is already done, no sense having an argument about it at this point. I wish Josie would sleep through the night!!

Micksbabe · #7 August 15th, 2010, 06:48 AM

my MIL does not care for my daughter, she lives 5 mins away and has only seen her 5 times in 8 months. She makes no effort whatsoever to come and see her, so I make no effort.

I am sorry that your MIL did that, I hope that you can figure it out. I agree with the other ladies if it is an isolated incident then maybe just let it go, but if it happens again I would say something for sure

KCMomma · #8 August 15th, 2010, 08:00 AM

Oh Marci, I totally feel your pain. My MIL watches Paige for us every single day while we work...which is awesome, I know, but at the same time it comes with many obstacles. We fought with her for many many months about naps and feeding schedules, but ultimately you have to stick to your guns. I would say that if this is just a one time thing then let it be, however if something like that happened again, I would have DH talk to her. I let DH handle all the "touchy" conversations with her as I think she will take it better coming from her. It's a really tough position to be in, but when we thought about it like "we have to do what is best for Paige" then we were able to stick to our guns. Will your MIL watch her a lot?

Oreobaby · #9 August 15th, 2010, 09:58 AM

She actually won't watch her alone till she is older. She is very nervous with her. She hasn't held a baby since my DH was little. lol...I was here, and tried to make suggestions that I could take her, and that I could feed her, but she was having none of it. In the future I will probably say something, because once she did get up to eat, she didn't get to sleep again till 12:00 which still isn't bad when she sleeps till 6:30 am.

Thanks ladies...I am going to have to get the corage to talk to her, and let her know Rayanne's schedule.

KDD · #10 August 15th, 2010, 10:47 AM

I agree with the others. If it happens again, simply say something like - "Oh, don't let her fall asleep. She hasn't eaten yet". And if she ignores you then I would take Rayanne and feed her then give her back to grandma.

On one hand I'm glad both our parents live a day away so these things won't be a consistent problem. On the other hand, it would be nice to have a grandparent close by to watch the Progeny from time to time.

~* Liss *~ · #11 August 15th, 2010, 02:43 PM

Aww... Marci - I'm so sorry!

When Nikolas was about a month old my MIL did something similar. He had just eaten though and was all happy, etc... so she puts him on her shoulder and rubs his back until he fell asleep! It messed him up cause he woke up wanting to eat right away and it was only like an hour or so since he last ate. She would also complain that he was always sleeping - but she was the one putting him to sleep! lol

I would agree with the other girls though - let it go at first and if it continues then speak up. Since you EP, maybe offer Grandma the bottle to feed her before she naps?