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Should bars serve pregnant women?


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  #21  
October 19th, 2009, 01:03 PM
foxfire_ga79
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Not you specifically, there have been several posts where smoking is mentioned and it seems that people are implying they are the same.
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  #22  
October 19th, 2009, 01:37 PM
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I would not serve a pregnant woman if I could legally do so...She is technically contributing to a minor, her fetus is recieving alcohol!
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  #23  
October 19th, 2009, 02:00 PM
$pryNinja's Avatar Zef Fre$ Mom
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I agree that the bar would have to serve her. But what if they found out for sure she was pregnant and she was coming in on a regular basis drinking. Would that be a social services call??
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  #24  
October 19th, 2009, 03:15 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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That story about the little guy's father wanting to give his boy 3 shots of expresso really isn't sitting well with me.. I'm so glad you did decaf..

((stalking off mad))
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  #25  
October 19th, 2009, 03:48 PM
BonitaAppleBomb's Avatar ~African-American-Mommy~
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Quote:
Originally Posted by foxfire_ga79 View Post
Not you specifically, there have been several posts where smoking is mentioned and it seems that people are implying they are the same.
They are the same because they're both bad for unborn babies as well as babies that have been born. Seriously, I don't rate one above the other when they can both do harm inside the womb as well as outside the womb. I guess some people look at it as though one doesn't do as much harm as the other?....which is a crock in itself IMO. They're both harmful.
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  #26  
October 19th, 2009, 03:54 PM
aussiemummy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jess5377 View Post


Seriously. This isn't a police state and I like having autonomy over my own body, pregnant or not, thank you.
When is anyone going to give a crap about the baby? Why is it always about the mother?

Quote:
Originally Posted by MelissaS View Post
I would not serve a pregnant woman if I could legally do so...She is technically contributing to a minor, her fetus is recieving alcohol!
Apparently no one gives a crap about the baby anyway.
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  #27  
October 19th, 2009, 05:58 PM
AMDG's Avatar Margaret
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aussiemummy View Post
When is anyone going to give a crap about the baby? Why is it always about the mother?



Apparently no one gives a crap about the baby anyway.

I care very much about the baby. I believe the baby has equal value as the mother. But you have the draw the line somewhere. Should a store clerk refuse to sell soda to a pregnant mom? Should a candy store refuse to sell candy? A paint store sell paint? A drug store sell over the counter meds or hair dye? What about a sushi bar selling sushi? What about a gym allowing strenuous physical exercise? Do you want me to continue with the list? I would my life savings on the fact that doing many of those things during pregnancy is more harmful than a woman drinking a glass of wine or a beer at a bar.
Please - show me how an alcoholic drink is more harmful than those other things OR tell me that you think all those things should be denied to pregnant women OR admit that you are being inconsistent.
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  #28  
October 19th, 2009, 06:07 PM
SusieQ2's Avatar Jersey Girl
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There's a bit of a difference in the fact that when I go to the grocery store and purchase something it isn't always for me. I try to avoid lunch meat when pregnant but my DH still eats it in his lunch most days. I do all of the grocery shopping so when I'm walking up to the register with a lb of turkey and a bag of chips they aren't for me. If I walked up to a bar and ordered and appletini and sat down to drink it then it's obviously for me.
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  #29  
October 19th, 2009, 07:30 PM
fluffycheeks's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by foxfire_ga79 View Post
Why is drinking being compared to smoking? Those things are not even remotely similar. Nobody should smoke, pregnant or not. 1 cigarette a day is way worse than 1 drink a day could ever think about being. Drinking does not affect the people around you like smoking does.
Implying that drinking is on the same danger level as smoking is comparing apples and oranges.
Where did you get your information? So far, NO safe limit has been established for either smoking or drinking, so I think it's a very fair comparison. However, unless you are an alcoholic, there is no reason you can't just skip the alcohol for 9 months, but it's darn near impossible for many smokers to quit cold turkey so I actually have more respect for a pregnant smoker who is trying to quit than a pregnant drinker who is having a drink just because they feel like it. And there are several studies that show drinking as little as one drink per week can cause behavioral problems in children.
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  #30  
October 19th, 2009, 07:33 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by aussiemummy View Post
When is anyone going to give a crap about the baby? Why is it always about the mother?

I know, right? I mean seriously, who cares if a girl needs to "unwind." Go take a bath, go watch a movie, go get a pedicure........ drinking when pregnant for any reason is asinine and should be considered child abuse. I don't think anyone would condone someone shooting up every now and then when pregnant, so why would people look at a girl and think it's okay for her to drink when pregnant? Both harm the fetus, so I guess if it's kosher to drink it's kosher to do drugs when pregnant.... right?!?!?!

**rolls eyes**
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  #31  
October 19th, 2009, 08:24 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by donomama View Post
Where did you get your information? So far, NO safe limit has been established for either smoking or drinking, so I think it's a very fair comparison. However, unless you are an alcoholic, there is no reason you can't just skip the alcohol for 9 months, but it's darn near impossible for many smokers to quit cold turkey so I actually have more respect for a pregnant smoker who is trying to quit than a pregnant drinker who is having a drink just because they feel like it. And there are several studies that show drinking as little as one drink per week can cause behavioral problems in children.
I agree. I've never understood the "but I really need a drink" excuse. If you really "need" a drink then perhaps you have a problem with alcohol.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2Froggy View Post
I know, right? I mean seriously, who cares if a girl needs to "unwind." Go take a bath, go watch a movie, go get a pedicure........ drinking when pregnant for any reason is asinine and should be considered child abuse. I don't think anyone would condone someone shooting up every now and then when pregnant, so why would people look at a girl and think it's okay for her to drink when pregnant? Both harm the fetus, so I guess if it's kosher to drink it's kosher to do drugs when pregnant.... right?!?!?!

**rolls eyes**
I agree with this as well. During this pregnancy I haven't really had much in the way of cravings. The only one thing I had a really strong craving for was a Margarita. I'm not much of a drinker but for someone I just wanted one so badly. Well that was one craving I wasn't willing to give in to. It wasn't worth it to me.
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  #32  
October 19th, 2009, 08:29 PM
AMDG's Avatar Margaret
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SusieQ2 View Post
There's a bit of a difference in the fact that when I go to the grocery store and purchase something it isn't always for me. I try to avoid lunch meat when pregnant but my DH still eats it in his lunch most days. I do all of the grocery shopping so when I'm walking up to the register with a lb of turkey and a bag of chips they aren't for me. If I walked up to a bar and ordered and appletini and sat down to drink it then it's obviously for me.

What about a woman at a Sushi bar? What about the woman at the gym?
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  #33  
October 19th, 2009, 08:33 PM
foxfire_ga79
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So there are studies out there with hard proof that drinking IS as bad as smoking? One drink causes the same amount of damage as one smoke? And that scientists/doctors are CERTAIN that an occasional drink by a pregnant woman WILL cause damage to the baby?
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  #34  
October 19th, 2009, 08:37 PM
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It's a big leap to say I don't care about babies just because I don't happen to think that a pregnant woman's body is public property.
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  #35  
October 19th, 2009, 08:37 PM
foxfire_ga79
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Originally Posted by SusieQ2 View Post
I agree. I've never understood the "but I really need a drink" excuse. If you really "need" a drink then perhaps you have a problem with alcohol.
You have no business accusing people of having problems with alcohol just because they don't think alcohol is bad.
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  #36  
October 19th, 2009, 08:57 PM
chlodoll
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I don't think that a bartender should have that right. If a woman wants to potentially harm her fetus and be judged by everyone around her that is unfortunately her business.

I don't really drink so I don't see the big deal with abstaining from doing so while you are pregnant. I don't think that a single drink will do any harm but I just don't really see the point. There are so many things we don't do while pregnant just in case that are not very likely to cause much harm.
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  #37  
October 19th, 2009, 09:18 PM
AMDG's Avatar Margaret
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mom2Froggy View Post
I know, right? I mean seriously, who cares if a girl needs to "unwind." Go take a bath, go watch a movie, go get a pedicure........ drinking when pregnant for any reason is asinine and should be considered child abuse. I don't think anyone would condone someone shooting up every now and then when pregnant, so why would people look at a girl and think it's okay for her to drink when pregnant? Both harm the fetus, so I guess if it's kosher to drink it's kosher to do drugs when pregnant.... right?!?!?!

**rolls eyes**

Don't take too hot of a bath - it could hurt your baby. Don't go to a theater to watch a movie - loud noises could cause your baby stress. Don't get a pedicure - you could catch a fungus or get a infection that could affect your baby. All of those things could cause your baby harm and doing any of them when pregnant "for any reason is asinine and should be considered child abuse."
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  #38  
October 19th, 2009, 10:10 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AMDG View Post
Don't take too hot of a bath - it could hurt your baby. Don't go to a theater to watch a movie - loud noises could cause your baby stress. Don't get a pedicure - you could catch a fungus or get a infection that could affect your baby. All of those things could cause your baby harm and doing any of them when pregnant "for any reason is asinine and should be considered child abuse."
The difference between those things is that there is no "safe" determined level of alcohol consumption in pregnancy. No one knows where we can exactly draw the line for safe consumption and one that can hurt a developing fetus. There are risks with a lot of what we do in pregnancy, but there is a risk that is known to cause serious lifelong harm to a baby and that's alcohol/drugs. It is 100% preventable. There is no reason to drink when pregnant.

I almost miscarried my daughter... I had just turned 19, was partying every weekend, just out of high school, wanting to live life, and bam! Im pregnant. That's all good, the second I found out I stopped smoking. Never touched alcohol. Almost miscarried my daughter and had to be put on bedrest, where I couldn't take a bath (risk of infection because of me dilating), I was hardly allowed to go up and down the stairs, almost had to withdraw from college because my doctor feared that school stress and carrying books would send me into labor or miscarry. I did everything I was supposed to, to make sure my daughter was safe and secure. I changed my diet drastically, I didn't go out. In fact, for graduation I went and attempted to go to a party where I was hired as a photographer and ended up sleeping in the back corner, so my ex took me home. After that I didn't leave the bed except for the store, the doctor, and school (which had severe restrictions.) I smoked like a chimney before, stopped the day I found out I was pregnant. Heck, I did drugs before I was pregnant. Stopped that.

Point is, its NOT THAT HARD. When something has no known level of being "safe" and it is just soooo easy to just not pick up that bottle of beer, why do it? I had this precious life I almost lost, and had friends telling me I should do MDMA/ecstasy during pregnancy because once wouldn't hurt. Would you guys of condoned that if I had said I did partake? (Which I didn't) I would hope you all would be horrified that I did that. Point is, I was a wild teen who loved to drink, was still in high school, did drugs, but that all stopped the second I found out I was pregnant. I did everything I could to sustain my pregnancy. ITS NOT THAT HARD!

Also, I fail to see how drinking/drugs during pregnancy is somehow comparable to being near loud noises, when it's nowhere near the same thing. You shouldn't stand next to speakers but there are guidelines to follow when at a concert, but there is no guidelines to follow when drinking during pregnancy... get my drift? It's not comparable. At all.

I love a good beer, but I value my developing child more. Also, I have a friend with FAS and seeing what she grew up with because of her ***** of a Mom not putting down the drink is what makes me think how selfish it is to drink when pregnant.

I mean really, would anyone here listen to me if I said "Im only going to do MDMA once when pregnant, because one pill won't hurt the baby, and it's just to unwind for a night." Would anyone really think that was a good idea? I sure hope not.
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  #39  
October 19th, 2009, 10:13 PM
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Originally Posted by foxfire_ga79 View Post
You have no business accusing people of having problems with alcohol just because they don't think alcohol is bad.
I don't know whether to roll my eyes or just laugh. I didn't accuse anyone of having problems with alcohol just because they don't think alcohol is bad. Heck I don't think alcohol is bad. What I said was that if a person says they NEED a drink then maybe they have a problem. No NEEDS a drink. They WANT a drink.
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  #40  
October 19th, 2009, 10:19 PM
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I'd like to point out that the question we're discussing is not whether or not a pregnant woman should drink, but whether or not bars/bartenders should refuse to serve them.
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