[~Sandy~]

Kind of an opinon/question/advice type thing here.

James has chores he has to do every day and they are:
-clean and vacuum the living room
-keep his room clean
-wash/dry fold/put away his own laundry
-clean off the dinner table after dinner

Of course the laundry and the bedroom aren't done every day, but the others are and I do not pay him for his chores. Recently though he started complaining that all his friends get paid for chores and that he should too. Usually I don't entertain debates with my 10 almost 11 year old, but I admit that my chore experience came from when I was growing up and I had a massive amount of chores and never got paid, it was expected as a part of contributing to the household as a family member, and that was what I was doing with James, as well as what I was planning when my other kids are old enough.

Anyway.... should I be paying him? If I should, what do you pay a kid for chores?

[BonitaAppleBomb]

When my child reaches a certain age, I will give him an allowance. If he wants to say that part of that allowance is for fulfilling his responsibilities, then so be it. But while he's a child, I will never pay him for something that he's responsible for doing in the first place.

If he does something outside his normal realm of responsibilities, such as mowing the lawn, then I'll probably pay him to do that; while at the same time encouraging him to make a neighborhood job out of it. But I'm not going to pay him to keep his room clean, vacuum his room and do the dishes, when those are things that he's responsible for doing anyway...but that's just me.

[Cereal Killer]

I want to implement a system similar to one of my friends. She has a list of chores for each of her children and, for each one that they complete, they get one quarter. If, at the end of the week, they have completed their tasks daily, they will receive five dollars. The kids then have three jars that the money gets divided into, spending, savings and tithing. They get to put two in spending, two in savings and one in tithing.

I think it is a great system. I would cut out the tithing, though.

[mayandsofiasmommy]

I can see both sides of this issue, and used to think pay for chores. Now, I will not. Here is the reasoning:
I expect my children to contribute to the family. This includes doing chores. *I* do not get paid for cleaning, I clean to keep the house nice. They will do chores to contribute. This way they are also not learning that you have to get something for doing something. I see this with students SO often- especially when their teachers in the past used rewards. They won't do anything without expecting something in return. I tell them to pick up some trash on the floor, they say, "what will you give me? Candy?" Uh, no. Pick up trash to keep your environment clean.

Originally Posted by BonitaAppleBomb

When my child reaches a certain age, I will give him an allowance. If he wants to say that part of that allowance is for fulfilling his responsibilities, then so be it. But while he's a child, I will never pay him for something that he's responsible for doing in the first place.

If he does something outside his normal realm of responsibilities, such as mowing the lawn, then I'll probably pay him to do that; while at the same time encouraging him to make a neighborhood job out of it. But I'm not going to pay him to keep his room clean, vacuum his room and do the dishes, when those are things that he's responsible for doing anyway...but that's just me.

I totally agree!

[mayandsofiasmommy]

Originally Posted by ~Sandy~

Recently though he started complaining that all his friends get paid for chores and that he should too. Usually I don't entertain debates with my 10 almost 11 year old, but I admit that my chore experience came from when I was growing up and I had a massive amount of chores and never got paid, it was expected as a part of contributing to the household as a family member, and that was what I was doing with James, as well as what I was planning when my other kids are old enough.

You are going to hear this more and more as he goes into his teens. Just tell him that you are not "other parents" and have it stop there. I even hear this from my students: "Oh, Mrs. Science Teacher does this. Mr. History Teacher does that." I simply look at them and say, "Well, I'm Mrs. English Teacher, I'm not Mrs. Science Teacher."

I don't like the idea of paying children to be contributing members of the household; as adults we do chores simply because they need to be done, not because their is a financial reward attached to it. I definitely want to give my kids an allowance, to help them learn how to budget and save up for things they want.

One thing I was thinking about doing is having their assigned household chores and if they choose not to do them, that's fine, but they have to use their own allowance to pay someone else to do it for them (whether its me, dh or another sibling).

[Banned-Mommiex2]

I think that having chores is a great thing, but I am not so sure about paying for certain chores. Like we have an expectation that the house be clean and that the kids will eventually help us with it. I don't think that the kids should be paid for keeping their own rooms picked up or for making their own beds or picking up their own toys. I think that if they fail to do those things, that they will be punished in some way (like take priviledges away or something.) However, I don't have a problem with paying for chores that benefit the family as a whole, like setting the table, doing the dishes, taking out the trash, doing laundry, or mowing the lawn. Those I see as tasks that help the family out and they can get an allowance for that. I just don't want them to have the expectation of getting paid for maintaining their personal space or things. That should be a responsibility that they have and should not be paid for it.

[Jarheadwed]

My kids will not earn money for their chores, but they can earn privileges. You did really good at your chores this week and Timmy asked if you could sleep over this weekend? Permission granted. You neglected your chores this week and you want to spend Friday night playing video games? Nope.

We didn't get an allowance, ever. If we needed money, we asked for it, and if we had been well behaved and our chores had been done, we got what we needed. I am not sure how we will do that as far as an allowance goes. I want our kids to learn to be responsible with money, but I don't want them to think they should be paid for keeping their toys picked up.

[Banned-Mommiex2]

Originally Posted by insert clever username

I don't like the idea of paying children to be contributing members of the household; as adults we do chores simply because they need to be done, not because their is a financial reward attached to it. I definitely want to give my kids an allowance, to help them learn how to budget and save up for things they want.

One thing I was thinking about doing is having their assigned household chores and if they choose not to do them, that's fine, but they have to use their own allowance to pay someone else to do it for them (whether its me, dh or another sibling).

To the bolded: I like that idea, too.

[**Badfish**]

I will probably just do what my parents did with me. I got a weekly allowance and I had a list of chores that were expected to be completed by Sunday. I wasn't necessarily getting paid to do the chores, but my allowance would be withheld until they were done.

[AMDG]

I don't agree with paying children to do chores. I think children are part of the family unit just like the parents and as such they can and should be expected to help the family function proper and orderly - part of that is doing chores. Yes, they may see mommy or daddy get paid to go to work but I think chores are different - we all have to do things that aren't fun and we don't always get a "reward" for it.
In addition, a stubborn child may just decide to give up the allowance in order to not have to do any work around the house and I don't think that should be an option.
One other thing to think about - if you tie allowance to chores then every time you ask the child do something "extra" the response may be "what will I be paid" which seems reasonable if the kid is used to getting paid for chores. My personal opinion is that I should be able to ask my child to something around the house and they should do it because I ask not in order to be paid.

[rachna]

I did not get an allowance and I did not get paid for chores. when I was 11 I started babysitting, so that was my money. Before that I don't really remember!

I do not like the idea of paying the boys for chores. BUt if they want to earn money, I guess I could give them extra things to do or something. I have not thought about allowance.

[lesliek0211]

We didn't get paid for chores per-say, but we always had money to do the things we wanted to do, so that was kind of our reward. I like the idea of allowance and then they can pay someone to do their chores if they choose. Then, if you run out of money to go somewhere because that's what you chose to spend it on, tough luck.

[Tes]

I don't pay my daughter to do her chores. She is a functioning member of this family and is reminded of that on a daily basis. I will, however, pay her if she washes my car or pulls weeds, as those are extra things that should be paid for. In saying that, it's never more than 5 bucks.

[~Kris~]

We started giving our son an allowance this past fall. He can earn 4 nickels a day. He has to do whatever chores need to be done that day as well as have a good attitude (be nice to his brother, take his school work seriously, etc). If he doesn't fulfill his responsiblities, then he doesn't earn them that day.

We also use the allowance to teach him about saving, giving, and spending as well as learning about the various coins and paper money.

[Emm17]

Avery will be expected to contribute to the household chores, with no pay.

She will get an allowance, and I will expect her to save some of it ( I will have no problem giving her extra money for special things)

As I child, I did not do chores, or receive money.

[*Jillian*]

I am glad all of you have such good ideas about how to give allowance and how to get your kid to do their chores. I am literally clueless as what way would be the best. We never got an allowance. We got a little money if we needed it but we definitely didn't get ANY money if our chores weren't done. I never felt paid to do anything though.

[~Kris~]

One of the best moments since giving our son his allowance was when he wanted to buy the wooden vehicles they had in the Target $ spot. He knew he had $5+ in his jar and he picked out 4 things he wanted to buy and then he picked out one toy for his brother.

He also said he's saving up to buy Daddy a $5 footlong from Subway. Of course, I think he says this just so he can sing the song.

As he gets older, the allowance will increase and then if he wants to go see a movie or something special, then he'll have the money to do so. One day he asked to go out for ice cream, we told him we had ice cream at home, but he wanted to go out for it. So we did. We paid for our own and he paid for his.

Originally Posted by Jess is Write

I will probably just do what my parents did with me. I got a weekly allowance and I had a list of chores that were expected to be completed by Sunday. I wasn't necessarily getting paid to do the chores, but my allowance would be withheld until they were done.

Ditto.

[Eowyn]

I think it's important for children at a certain age to be able to earn and be responsible for their own money because knowing the worth of a dollar and learning to save/spend wisely is very important.
But I'd feel uncomfortable paying my child to do something they should already being doing like cleaning up their own room or washing dishes.

Our kids are still so young I dont know what we'll end up doing.