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Intentionally getting pregnant, when you have a child under a year old.


Forum: Heated Debates

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  #101  
June 15th, 2010, 06:15 PM
*Jillian*'s Avatar Baby #3 on the way
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Alabama
Posts: 11,288
Well, all I have ever heard is doctors recommend waiting a year to get pregnant again. Lauren posted all that information about why it is important to do this. I get that people go against dr's advice all the time, but why would a doctor that helped you conceive TWO children risk your health?

I don't understand infertility first hand. One of my best friends ttc for 5 years and is now the mother of triplets. We talk about it all the time so I am not completely in the dark when it comes to the feelings that go along with it. Before I get accused of having no clue or something.
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  #102  
June 15th, 2010, 06:16 PM
Mom of 2 boys!
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,085
Quote:
Originally Posted by (.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.) View Post
That's why I mentioned judging the doctors. Also, I don't understand how fertility doctors would be ok with this to start with? I'm *assuming* that they had an indepth conversation on how all of this pp, not-bfing, trying at three months idea works. I don't because I haven't been there and done that.


You are mad that a dead horse is being beaten this thread yet bring this up in this thread. Why is ok to do that? Isn't that being a touch hypocritical? Also, I wasn't just referring to you as the ffer bringing it up over and over again. You have a full bench of ladies with you.

Did you forget your last post...where you were accusing of only FF to be debating over the issue?? I was proving a point since you assume all others who do not agree with you are FF....


but oh well..not worth it.
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  #103  
June 15th, 2010, 06:17 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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  #104  
June 15th, 2010, 06:17 PM
eash's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2005
Posts: 1,969
Quote:
Originally Posted by *Jillian* View Post
Can someone please shed some light on why a doctor would disregard the health of the mother in order to conceive?

I totally get wanting another baby and being worried you can't have one. I don't understand a fertility doctor helping you conceive multiples and then, within a few months, putting you on meds to get pregnant asap after giving birth.
I can only speak from my own experience as I have no idea what happened in the OP -
fertility doctors do not want you to conceive multiples. That is not the goal and is considered a high risk and usually a failure. Typically, with IVF, the standards are such where they won't even transfer multiple embryos now until you reach a certain age. That being said, they are also a business and are run by success numbers so they want their pregnancy rate to increase, thus their success rate to stay high.

Who knows how old this lady was or how long it took her to conceive the first kids. If it took her a year, I could easily hear her fertility doc say, lets just start you back on clomid and see what happens. I doubt highly he said, lets try for triplets because that reduces the chance for live births.

Who knows though...there are bad eggs in the fertility doc dept.
  #105  
June 15th, 2010, 06:29 PM
*Jillian*'s Avatar Baby #3 on the way
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Alabama
Posts: 11,288
Quote:
Originally Posted by eashley View Post
I can only speak from my own experience as I have no idea what happened in the OP -
fertility doctors do not want you to conceive multiples. That is not the goal and is considered a high risk and usually a failure. Typically, with IVF, the standards are such where they won't even transfer multiple embryos now until you reach a certain age. That being said, they are also a business and are run by success numbers so they want their pregnancy rate to increase, thus their success rate to stay high.

Who knows how old this lady was or how long it took her to conceive the first kids. If it took her a year, I could easily hear her fertility doc say, lets just start you back on clomid and see what happens. I doubt highly he said, lets try for triplets because that reduces the chance for live births.

Who knows though...there are bad eggs in the fertility doc dept.
This is one of my original thoughts and why I am concerned about women's health regardless if it is their choice or not. I know it is a woman's choice and i support that, but a doctor isn't supposed to recommend treatments that could be harmful? Is he? I guess it doesn't matter these days.
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  #106  
June 15th, 2010, 06:30 PM
KimberlyD0
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Quote:
Originally Posted by (.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.) View Post
I find your argument that I have a agenda ridiculous and have laughed at it continuously through these last posts. Now I'm a victim? That's the best one yet!!
Of course you have an agenda. Thats why everything turns into a BF/FF debate and a vaccine debate for you, often when they have nothing to do with the origional debate (its part of your charm it'd be no fun without it LOL)

Just don't be suprised when you get called on it

I'm not going to "report you" I simply was pointing out what is very plain to see for many of us.



back to the debate at hand

Last edited by KimberlyD0; June 15th, 2010 at 06:32 PM.
  #107  
June 15th, 2010, 06:36 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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Nice double standard!

Quote:
Originally Posted by *Jillian* View Post
This is one of my original thoughts and why I am concerned about women's health regardless if it is their choice or not. I know it is a woman's choice and i support that, but a doctor isn't supposed to recommend treatments that could be harmful? Is he? I guess it doesn't matter these days.
I think those questions should matter but what I do I know?
  #108  
June 15th, 2010, 06:38 PM
IAmMomMomIAm
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Who says the doctor "recommended it"? Maybe it's what SHE wanted, and he agreed to it. I see a difference between "I think you should.." and "Um, okay.. if you REALLY want to.."
  #109  
June 15th, 2010, 06:38 PM
KrazE's Avatar ShutTheFrontDoor
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 2,546



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  #110  
June 15th, 2010, 06:39 PM
(.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Keskes View Post
Who says the doctor "recommended it"? Maybe it's what SHE wanted, and he agreed to it. I see a difference between "I think you should.." and "Um, okay.. if you REALLY want to.."
At the end of the day, the doctor did it. Is there no ethical standard to health here? I'm not saying she or the doctor are wrong, I just want to understand what the standard is in the first place.
  #111  
June 15th, 2010, 06:42 PM
IAmMomMomIAm
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Quote:
Originally Posted by (.Y.)mom2dd(.Y.) View Post
Nice double standard!


I think those questions should matter but what I do I know?
Sorry, this is getting old. You asked a question that several people thought was irrelevant, and you constantly suggesting that every question asked is irrelevant just because YOURS was is just plain ridiculous.

Give it a rest. We get it. You don't have an agenda, and all you care about is learning about NFP. That's why, in your original question, you asked her why she didn't breast feed, but made no mention of fertility, conception, birth control, or NFP. You said 'why didn't you breast feed." If you wanted to know about it from a birth control perspective, you probably should have said that. Because at this point, it looks like you were pushing your common BF agenda and then tried to change it when you were called on it.

And for the love of Pete, you are NOT hated by anyone who formula feeds. Do you NOT see how accusing us of that just furthers our opinion that you're pushing your agenda? Not only was this nurse selfish enough to not breast feed, but all of us formula feeders are just as selfish and are backing her up just to gang up on the breast feeder. Because OBVIOUSLY us formula feeders hate breast feeders and think they ALL have agenda.

/end rant /end participation in this thread because it's pissed me off way too much /hope that getting all worked up over absolutely nothing sends me into labor *crosses fingers*
  #112  
June 15th, 2010, 06:45 PM
mayandsofiasmommy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: CA
Posts: 12,545
Quote:
Originally Posted by *Jillian* View Post
So fertility doctors go against obstetrician's recommendations of waiting a year to become pregnant after childbirth?? Interesting. How did he know how many fertile years you had left?

Am I allowed to ask that question?

Not all OBs say to wait a year. And REs are OBs with more school and a specialization in fertility. And yes, they can judge about how much fertile time you have. They basically test your ovarian reserves.

Michelle- if you have dealt with infertility and you know you want more than 1 child, you will do what you have to to have another child. If that means not BFing to have a greater chance of getting, and staying pregnant, so be it.

I do wish people who have not dealt with infertility would withhold some judgment. It's different when you are living it. It's a complicated and heartbreaking thing, and it makes me sad that smart women on here are judging someone like that. If there is nothing medically wrong w/ trying to conceive a few months after birth, why is that so wrong?

And what ethical standard to health?? If the woman is healthy enough to re-start fertility treatments, the RE is going to say go for it!
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  #113  
June 15th, 2010, 06:46 PM
Mom of 2 boys!
Join Date: Feb 2009
Posts: 2,085
Quote:
Originally Posted by Keskes View Post
Sorry, this is getting old. You asked a question that several people thought was irrelevant, and you constantly suggesting that every question asked is irrelevant just because YOURS was is just plain ridiculous.

Give it a rest. We get it. You don't have an agenda, and all you care about is learning about NFP. That's why, in your original question, you asked her why she didn't breast feed, but made no mention of fertility, conception, birth control, or NFP. You said 'why didn't you breast feed." If you wanted to know about it from a birth control perspective, you probably should have said that. Because at this point, it looks like you were pushing your common BF agenda and then tried to change it when you were called on it.

And for the love of Pete, you are NOT hated by anyone who formula feeds. Do you NOT see how accusing us of that just furthers our opinion that you're pushing your agenda? Not only was this nurse selfish enough to not breast feed, but all of us formula feeders are just as selfish and are backing her up just to gang up on the breast feeder. Because OBVIOUSLY us formula feeders hate breast feeders and think they ALL have agenda.

/end rant /end participation in this thread because it's pissed me off way too much /hope that getting all worked up over absolutely nothing sends me into labor *crosses fingers*



Hey look at this...I am agreeing with you a lot in this thread BTW: Maybe this will jumpstart that labor...keep on debating!!
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  #114  
June 15th, 2010, 06:57 PM
KimberlyD0
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RTMOM View Post
Hey look at this...I am agreeing with you a lot in this thread BTW: Maybe this will jumpstart that labor...keep on debating!!
Come on we're waiting for you!!!
  #115  
June 15th, 2010, 07:14 PM
IAmMomMomIAm
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Posts: n/a
This "Special Delivery" is taking forever to get here. next time I will be more careful to make sure it's not shipping from Canada. I guess I should have gone with FedEx.
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