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Research has suggested that getting a little attention outside your marriage can heat things up. In 2006, a London study found that more than a quarter of those in long-term relationships say that getting attention from others increases their sex drive, and makes them want their partner more. 70% of respondents in that survey said that flirting makes them feel "sexier and more confident."
Not for us. I personally think flirting with other people than your husband is cheating. I think there are better ways to heat things up that doesn't involve other people.
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Mama to G, L & twins F & M
Started off 2013 homebirthing suprise twins Fia Celesta & Maddalena Isabella
Not sure how I feel about that really. If it works for ya, great... but I do not think that it would fly in my relationship.
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~TTC #1 together 1 year and counting ~
Battling Estrogen Dominance, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis and Recurrent Miscarriage one day at a time
Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew and Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel and Dee 01/18/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies Hope 07/21/2012@4w1dKonnor 11/24/2012@3w6d"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6dRonen 02/102013@3w5d
I'm kind of torn on the matter. I can understand "in theory" how it could work, but I'm also not a fan of seeking any kind of attention outside of a marriage.
I don't have a problem with it. I know it makes me feel better about myself when someone other than my husband pays some attention to me. Since becoming a mom, I don't feel so great about myself and a little boost every now and then is nice to have. I don't mind for DH either, because I know he is true to me and flirting is nothing in my book. When we were out ToTing the other night, a bunch of old ladies were flirting with DH in front of me. I ragged on him later about it. hehe
I think the term flirting can mean different things for people as well. Some think of it as just being friendly with someone, compliments etc. I find it nice when someone compliments me etc. man or woman. For me the term flirting means someone trying to make sexual advances, and that is not ok with me. But being friendly is different. An old lady "flirting" with a younger man probably isn't trying to make sexual advances, and that is completely different then what I think flirting is.
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Mama to G, L & twins F & M
Started off 2013 homebirthing suprise twins Fia Celesta & Maddalena Isabella
I'm one of those people that doesn't think flirting is making sexual advances. I look at it as harmless attention given to the opposite sex. I don't view it as cheating either.
I don't know if it would necessarily boost a marriage, but my husband isn't one of those men that NEEDS attention from women and I don't either. It does feel good to be noticed though and I don't see any harm in it. No biggie as long as it doesn't go further and nobody has the wrong idea.
I'm one of those people that doesn't think flirting is making sexual advances. I look at it as harmless attention given to the opposite sex. I don't view it as cheating either.
I don't know if it would necessarily boost a marriage, but my husband isn't one of those men that NEEDS attention from women and I don't either. It does feel good to be noticed though and I don't see any harm in it. No biggie as long as it doesn't go further and nobody has the wrong idea.
Jillian, you TOTALLY need attention from other women. Its just who you are. You are a major flirt, dont deny it. You bat your eyes, flip your hair, and giggle at every pretty girl who walks in the room! Sometimes you even lower yourself to leaning over in front of a hot girl just so she can look down your shirt.
__________________ Don't let my post count fool you. I had over 11,000 posts before I took a hiatus from JM for a couple years, and while I'm back a little, I do not post like I used to. Life is just too chaotic.
I'm like MommaBee, I see different levels of flirting, and the kind I'm not ok with is Sexual Advances behind it.
DH's friends are charming. They're sweet, complimentary towards me, ask to steal me away. Some would see that as being flirty, I considering it charming
But there are other types of flirting, that are not so innocent that I would not be ok with in any manner.
Flirting (or coquetry) is a playful, romantic or sexual overture by one person to another subtly indicating an interest in a deeper relationship with the other person, and can involve verbal communication as well as body language.
charm (chärm)
n.
1. The power or quality of pleasing or delighting; attractiveness:
to me personally, two very different things. One is pretty clearly desiring more out of something, the other, not.
__________________
~TTC #1 together 1 year and counting ~
Battling Estrogen Dominance, Hashimoto's Thyroiditis and Recurrent Miscarriage one day at a time
Awesome siggy made by Jaidynsmum
Matthew and Mark 08/24/2005 9w1d, Mattie Anne 04/07/2008 8w Mel and Dee 01/18/2010 (8 weeks) and 5 chemical pregnancies Hope 07/21/2012@4w1dKonnor 11/24/2012@3w6d"Emmy"1/15/2013@ 3w6dRonen 02/102013@3w5d
^^ Ditto. One old lady that flirted with my husband went so far as to run her hand down his stomach near his groin. So old ladies can be just as nasty. Honestly, it makes me feel good that someone else would find me attractive enough to want to flirt with me. Like I said, to me, it is not cheating, no matter the intent, sexual or playful. DH and I do not wear rings, so how am I suppose to be upset if someone makes a sexual advance? I trust my DH and he trust me 100%. I don't care what he does as long as his body parts are kept to himself.
Jillian, you TOTALLY need attention from other women. Its just who you are. You are a major flirt, dont deny it. You bat your eyes, flip your hair, and giggle at every pretty girl who walks in the room! Sometimes you even lower yourself to leaning over in front of a hot girl just so she can look down your shirt.
^^ Ditto. One old lady that flirted with my husband went so far as to run her hand down his stomach near his groin. So old ladies can be just as nasty. Honestly, it makes me feel good that someone else would find me attractive enough to want to flirt with me. Like I said, to me, it is not cheating, no matter the intent, sexual or playful. DH and I do not wear rings, so how am I suppose to be upset if someone makes a sexual advance? I trust my DH and he trust me 100%. I don't care what he does as long as his body parts are kept to himself.
That little old lady would have been pulling back a bloody stump if I were you!
Hope 07/21/2012@4w1d
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