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200 lb. 8 year old removed from home


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  #1  
November 28th, 2011, 06:45 PM
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The Associated Press: Ohio county takes 200-pound 8-year-old from mother

Thoughts? Opinions? Was this appropriate?
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  #2  
November 28th, 2011, 06:49 PM
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The article doesn't really give much detail. Was he obese due to medical reasons? Was he obese because the parents didnt' care and fed him crap? It's hard for me to say if this is ok without knowing those details. If the parents are truly neglecting him in that they are feeding him crap food, then I can see where it would be good to take him away so he can get help. But if he is obese do to medical reasons, or he is eating healthy and exercising but it's just not coming off, then no, it's not ok.
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  #3  
November 28th, 2011, 06:54 PM
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Originally Posted by MommaBee View Post
The article doesn't really give much detail. Was he obese due to medical reasons? Was he obese because the parents didnt' care and fed him crap? It's hard for me to say if this is ok without knowing those details. If the parents are truly neglecting him in that they are feeding him crap food, then I can see where it would be good to take him away so he can get help. But if he is obese do to medical reasons, or he is eating healthy and exercising but it's just not coming off, then no, it's not ok.
I would think because they had been involved for 20 months prior to removal they probably ruled ou medical possibilities. I am not sure though, so I will see if I can find another article.
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  #4  
November 28th, 2011, 07:01 PM
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Kid too fat to live with mom? | World | News | London Free Press

This one says "The boy's mother, an elementary school teacher, is fighting the move. Her lawyer told the paper the boy only has one medical problem, sleep apnea, for which he is being treated, and that he's involved in school activities and is on the honour roll."

So sleep apnea is the only medical condition.
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  #5  
November 28th, 2011, 07:04 PM
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Hmm, still doesn't say much. Sleep apnea would most likely be from the obesity, but not causing it. I would still like to know how he got that obese before I make assumptions.
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  #6  
November 28th, 2011, 07:10 PM
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Originally Posted by MommaBee View Post
Hmm, still doesn't say much. Sleep apnea would most likely be from the obesity, but not causing it. I would still like to know how he got that obese before I make assumptions.
This next one is the best I can find (County places obese Cleveland Heights child in foster care | cleveland.com)

A few stand out quotes, to me:

"They said that the child's weight gain was caused by his environment and that the mother wasn't following doctor's orders -- which she disputes."

"Of course I love him. Of course I want him to lose weight. It's a lifestyle change, and they are trying to make it seem like I am not embracing that. It is very hard, but I am trying."

"Last year, the boy lost weight but in recent months began to gain it back rapidly. That's when the county moved to take the child, records show.
The mother said that when she found out that other kids and a sibling might be giving her son extra food, she tried to put a stop to it and explain to him that he could eat only certain foods."
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  #7  
November 28th, 2011, 07:37 PM
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So the thing that is bothering me is it seems that the foster mom is getting way more help then the biological mother. If the whole family is obese and they buy not so healthy food because that is what they know and can afford, then I think they need more time and more involvment with specialists. Maybe help them purchase healthy foods, take them to the store and show them what to buy, have a personal Chef come over and help mom cook simple healthy meals, have a personal trainer help the boy 3-5 times a week, get him involved in sports. Most people do not become obese overnight, nor do they loose weight over night and it can be a real struggle. And like the mom said, it is a lifestyle change. It takes time and it takes MORE than just some guidlines from the Doctor. It takes actual physically helping the family. So at this point, I'm going to say no, the child should not have been removed. They should have offered more in home support for the whole family. Kids going in and out of foster care can take a toll on them, and if he looses weight in foster care and them comes back home and the mother herself hasn't gotten help then he can gain it back and yo-yoing like that is not good either.
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  #8  
November 28th, 2011, 07:46 PM
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This article basically sums up how I feel Ohio Child Taken from Parents for Obesity, But It’s Okay to Sell Trans Fats, Fructose & Aspartame | Gaia Health
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  #9  
November 28th, 2011, 09:12 PM
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Ditto MommaBee.

What do they think? He is going to magically lose weight being away from his family and surroundings? Since when has doctors orders become law?
This is rediculous and a huge over boundaries from the government officials.
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  #10  
November 28th, 2011, 10:54 PM
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Originally Posted by Fluffy Baby View Post
Ditto MommaBee.

What do they think? He is going to magically lose weight being away from his family and surroundings? Since when has doctors orders become law?
This is rediculous and a huge over boundaries from the government officials.
Well actually he is going to magically lose weight in foster care and it will have nothing to do with the personal trainer they are providing for him. He should have never been put in foster care for his weight. If that was the case I should have been in foster care for being 250 in high school. I had asthma caused by my weight. They are going to set him up for failure when he does go home. You put that much emphasis on weight he will either eat to comfort himself causing weight gain or be so afraid of getting bigger he will stop eating alltogether and become anorexic.
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  #11  
November 29th, 2011, 06:27 AM
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Originally Posted by MommaBee View Post
So the thing that is bothering me is it seems that the foster mom is getting way more help then the biological mother. If the whole family is obese and they buy not so healthy food because that is what they know and can afford, then I think they need more time and more involvment with specialists. Maybe help them purchase healthy foods, take them to the store and show them what to buy, have a personal Chef come over and help mom cook simple healthy meals, have a personal trainer help the boy 3-5 times a week, get him involved in sports. Most people do not become obese overnight, nor do they loose weight over night and it can be a real struggle. And like the mom said, it is a lifestyle change. It takes time and it takes MORE than just some guidlines from the Doctor. It takes actual physically helping the family. So at this point, I'm going to say no, the child should not have been removed. They should have offered more in home support for the whole family. Kids going in and out of foster care can take a toll on them, and if he looses weight in foster care and them comes back home and the mother herself hasn't gotten help then he can gain it back and yo-yoing like that is not good either.
I guess it would be how much time is too much time. They've been working with this family for almost 2 years.

And is the personal chef, trainer, etc. etc. really a feasible solution? It's not just this boy who is severely overweight. Can we really afford to do that all the time?

I just think it's a lose lose situation. I think he should have been removed, but foster care is not ideal for any child and is so overwhelmed already.
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  #12  
November 29th, 2011, 07:47 AM
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Originally Posted by Larissa. View Post
I guess it would be how much time is too much time. They've been working with this family for almost 2 years.

And is the personal chef, trainer, etc. etc. really a feasible solution? It's not just this boy who is severely overweight. Can we really afford to do that all the time?

I just think it's a lose lose situation. I think he should have been removed, but foster care is not ideal for any child and is so overwhelmed already.
2 years may seem like a lot of time to us, but for someone who is mobidly obese, it's really not. Loosing weight can be extremely hard, especially if the whole family is obese or overweight. The article also said his siblings were sneaking him food. So this needs to be a whole family change.

Believe it or not, there are many parents out there who don't know how to cook healthy meals. Sure they know fruits and veggies are healthy, but many kids won't eat them plain, and if you don't know how to cook with them, they may not eat them. Having a Chef come into the home and show the mother how to cook these foods into healthy delicious meals would help. A personal trainer would certainly be a good thing. Most people have a personal trainer even when not overweight, you can get them cheap and even free at some gyms if you are a member. So yes, a personal trainer in this case would be great.

Being removed from his home can cause emotional damage, which can make him eat more since we all know eating is a comfort tool. He may be loosing weight right now, but is it out of fear or love? This whole situation is setting him up for future bad eating habits. It doesn't have to be a lose lose situation. If he would have stayed in his home and his family was given true help for the whole family just like the foster mom is (the foster mom is getting a personal trainer for the boy, why not the real mom?) then this boy could lose weight and keep it off and the whole family could do it together and be healthier as a whole. I've seen it done before, no reason it can be done in this case as well, it just takes TIME and a complete lifestyle change.
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  #13  
November 29th, 2011, 08:49 AM
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Maybe I'm being closed minded to the situation, but 200 lbs at 8 years old screams "neglect" to me. I can't buy into the "junk food is cheaper" theory either. Around here at least, I can't afford junk. I have to buy the basics. Chicken, veggies, fruit.. My grocery bill skyrockets if I start adding in junk food.

As a parent, we are responsible for the health care of our children. When we fail to give our children the NECESSARY health care they need, be it healthy food or whatever, and that leads to a long-term health problem (obesity, which brings in a whole slew of health complications), it's time for someone to step in.

I will be the first to say that, as a parent, if I want to feed my kids a whole box of Oreos every friggin day, I should legally be allowed assuming my children are generally healthy. However, if my actions begin to cause health problems for them and I fail to STOP feeding them oreos every day because "it's hard"..NOT OKAY.
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  #14  
November 29th, 2011, 08:56 AM
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Nowhere did it say in any article that she fed her kid a box of oreos every day. In some places junk food is tons cheaper than healthy foods. I know it is where I live. If you grew up in an unhealthy home it is hard to break that cycle when you have kids. This is not a new concept.
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  #15  
November 29th, 2011, 08:56 AM
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My 6'2" 32 year old husband weighs around 225, this 8 year old weighs 218. There is either a serious health problem or a serious neglect problem. A kid doesn't magically weigh that much overnight - this had to be a long standing problem. The articles I've read haven't said anything about health issues other than sleep apnea, which is probably caused by his weight issue. I have a hard time seeing this situation as anything but neglect on the part of the mother / parents.
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  #16  
November 29th, 2011, 09:01 AM
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If you don't know how to cook healthy foods because you weren't raised that way or because you live in an area where there is a lot of unhealthy foods available to you and the people around you is also overweight then I don't see this as neglect. The siblings were giving food to this boy, the mother can't be there 24/7, I believe in one article she did say she works. The child also attends school. The parents are NOT the only influence on this child. Yes 200 lbs at 8 years is a huge problem, but that doesn't mean it's neglect. My sister is a Pediatrician in Ohio and says that most, yes most, of the parents who come into the clinic are very uneducated and have no idea that pop is a bad choice for a 3 year old.
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  #17  
November 29th, 2011, 09:04 AM
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I have to agree with Lacey. For a child that young to be that heavy without medical conditions causing it, it's neglect pure and simple.
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  #18  
November 29th, 2011, 09:10 AM
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Originally Posted by MommaBee View Post
If you don't know how to cook healthy foods because you weren't raised that way or because you live in an area where there is a lot of unhealthy foods available to you and the people around you is also overweight then I don't see this as neglect. The siblings were giving food to this boy, the mother can't be there 24/7, I believe in one article she did say she works. The child also attends school. The parents are NOT the only influence on this child. Yes 200 lbs at 8 years is a huge problem, but that doesn't mean it's neglect. My sister is a Pediatrician in Ohio and says that most, yes most, of the parents who come into the clinic are very uneducated and have no idea that pop is a bad choice for a 3 year old.
I don't know. I can see that being an excuse for a while but its not like the knowledge isn't out there and available to everyone. Its not hard to educate yourself if you want to. Using environment as an excuse for neglect just doesn't work for me. I don't see how any parent could look at their obese child and think that its perfectly acceptable and that their child is healthy - I honestly don't.
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  #19  
November 29th, 2011, 09:15 AM
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Originally Posted by MommaBee View Post
Nowhere did it say in any article that she fed her kid a box of oreos every day. In some places junk food is tons cheaper than healthy foods. I know it is where I live. If you grew up in an unhealthy home it is hard to break that cycle when you have kids. This is not a new concept.
First of all, I was just making an example. I am not one to police every move parents make and I think UNTIL it crosses the line of abuse or neglect, the gov't needs to stay the f out. This, to me, is clearly neglect.


Second of all, it isnt a new concept. Not at all. When you grow up in an emotionally unhealthy home or abusive home, it is also hard to break that cycle when you have kids (or so I read). Should we leave kids in homes with emotionally or physically abusive parents, since the parents were likely brought up that way and are having a hard time breaking the cycle?
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  #20  
November 29th, 2011, 09:23 AM
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Originally Posted by BittyBugsMama View Post
I don't know. I can see that being an excuse for a while but its not like the knowledge isn't out there and available to everyone. Its not hard to educate yourself if you want to. Using environment as an excuse for neglect just doesn't work for me. I don't see how any parent could look at their obese child and think that its perfectly acceptable and that their child is healthy - I honestly don't.
It might not be hard for you to educate yourself, but it truly is for some people. Nowhere did the mother say that her child was perfectly healthy, nor did she say that this was acceptable. She said she was trying and it is hard. TRYING and it's HARD. Is what she said, which is absolutly true. I get so many postpartum clients who say they've tried everything to get rid of the baby weight and can't, and then sometimes it starts to escalate and they start gaining instead of losing. It happens. Our bodies are not all built the same. Having an obese child is not neglect. The child is well adjusted and an honor roll student, sorry but that doesn't shout neglect to me. The mother isn't forcing her child to eat food, maybe his body just metabolizes it differently, it happens. I know I've spoken about my morbidly obese friend before on here but I think it's worth it again. She has always been obese since I've known her in kindegarten. She was 200 lbs in Elementary. Her whole family is obese and they eat healthy. Sure she could exercise more, but she does eat healthy and that is just the way her family is. Her parents were in no way neglectful. I've ate many meals with her in my life time and she always had a good helping of fruits and veggies and limits meat and bread. Being uneducated is not neglect. This is a cycle and it's hard to break. Again, my sister is a Pediatrician in Ohio and uneducated parents who think pop and other such foods are ok is common, and again, not neglect. We do not require parenting classes to be a parent, so we don't know what they know. Internet is not in every household, cars to get to a library isn't either. And we have foods that say they are healthy when they aren't. Maybe we should stop letting companies make food with artificial junk, or letting them lie right there on the box/can. Why are only the parents responsible when kids eat at school and parents buy food they think are healthy but they aren't? Why can't we just help people instead? Is it so hard to say "hey your kid is a bit on the big side. So we're going to help you with that. Here is a list of healthy foods that you ALL should eat on a daily basis together. This guy is Mike and he's going to come to your home and work out with your son 5 times a week. This is Cindy and she's going to meet you at the grocery store on Saturday at noon to show you what foods you should be providing to your ENTIRE family. Here is a list of counselors for you to call and set up an appointment with to get your family back on track and here is a list of parenting educators (because there are those out there) that will help you get your family healthy and help you make better parenting choices". Wow, so fricken hard huh? I guess it's just easier to assume that parents of fat kids are bad parents and they are neglectful.
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