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  #1  
April 17th, 2012, 08:25 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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I read a blog and he put up a video submitted by a viewer of their little girl being overly melodramatic and having a tantrum over having to put her bowl in the sink. I thought it was adorable and had a few giggles remembering doing it myself.

Funniest Video I've Seen in a Long Time.

But a few commenters had other opinions. This one really stuck out (other than the idiot promoting whipping the child)


Quote:
I don't understand why this is funny or why Dan, you would think it's ok for a Dad to stand there and video tape his child while she is obviously so distressed regardless of trying to teach her to clean up after herself. Those were real tears, would you treat an adult in that manner? In my opinion this post goes against everything you try to inspire parents to be for their children.
Quote:
I think it's so disrespectful to video tape a child while they are having a tantrum. It doesn't matter that she's trying to get out of clearing her bowl by being dramatic, she's obviously tired and having a hard time. Instead of video taping his gallant attempts at patient parenting, he could put the camera down and give his child a hug, then help her clean up.
(and the fb version of the 2nd quote... she changed the last bit)

Quote:
I'm totally disappointed in this post and think it goes against everything Dan is trying to inspire within the parenting community. I think it's so disrespectful to video tape a child while they are having a dramatic tantrum. It doesn't matter that she's trying to get out of clearing her bowl, she's obviously tired and having a hard time. Instead of video taping his gallant attempts at patient parenting, he could put the camera down and give his child a hug, then return to asking her to finish the task.


So I kinda want to hear what the mommy circut thinks about the video, and this woman`s comment...
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  #2  
April 17th, 2012, 08:31 PM
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I thought it was funny. The dad didn't seem mean at all, he was totally encouraging her to do it. But yeah, funny.
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  #3  
April 17th, 2012, 08:36 PM
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Well while I do find it somewhat funny, and would definitely find it funny even if it were my own child(and we've had moments like that too). I do agree a bit on the whole video taping of it.
I know what he's trying to teach her, and why, I won't discount that, but that little girl is VERY tired and that is plainly obvious. Sometimes life's little lessons can wait a bit, especially when we're dealing with little ones.

Knowing how to be responsible and help clean up after yourself just isn't always as important as a nice reassuring hug when you're having a rough time, not to mention a nice long nap. Which this little girl quite clearly needs.

It did look a little like she was both distressed and also trying not to be at the same time. Almost like trying to make a game of it, despite the fact that she was quite clearly pissed off. I give her an A+ for effort and the camera man a C for not realizing that was prime time for a cuddly moment, not a little life lesson.
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  #4  
April 17th, 2012, 10:06 PM
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I have no problem with the way he handled it, nor with his video taping it. Sure she looks tired. But if she's like many kids, I suspect she would have plenty of energy left for playing with toys. Kudos to him for remaining patient. There are many of parents out there who would have lost their tempers. If this video provides other parents with some food for thought on how not to lose their temper, then all the better.
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  #5  
April 18th, 2012, 03:13 AM
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That video is hilarious, lol! I would have videotaped my kid doing that as well.
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  #6  
April 18th, 2012, 03:24 AM
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I didnt find it funny at all. Its a kid having a tantrum, you normally get annoyed by that, not have a chuckle at it.
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  #7  
April 18th, 2012, 05:13 AM
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Totally looks like my Becca I love it Except her's would be getting a new food to try and crying about how she haaaaaaaaaaates it. A word we don't even use very often!

Oh and it would be a nasty brown puppy she'd be holding instead of the blankie
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  #8  
April 18th, 2012, 07:09 AM
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I just had to go to my phone to watch it. Goodness. I don't see an issue with it. I might have turned the camera off a tiny bit sooner and snuggled her as soon as she got the dishes up to the sink. Really, though, she did look tired, but it wasn't what I expected. She was clearly more upset about the task at hand. I was expecting a poor kiddo who could hardly walk from exhaustion. It was a simple, basic task that would have taken her about 10 seconds to do. Plus, she was clearly old enough to understand. I actually liked the way her dad spoke to her and was patient throughout the process. I would assume as soon as the camera went off, she got a nice big hug and tucked into bed. I'm also going to take a guess that this is not the first time she has acted this way. I mean, he had the camera at the ready, so I would guess she's done it, or something similar, a few times before. If it were a first offense, I think taping might be a little bit harsh and embarassing (especially since she clearly realized he was taping her), but if she's a repeat offender, I don't really see any problem.
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  #9  
April 18th, 2012, 07:11 AM
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I also found it funny. It reminded me of my own kid and how dramatic he can get over things that are "too heavy." I probably would have taped it myself just to show him later on about how he used to be. The dad was calm, didn't yell, didn't out right laugh in the kids face. He encouraged her to keep on trying. Plus, it's only 1.18 minutes long. We don't know that he didn't go comfort the kid after he put the camera down. People assume too much and want to coddle their kids a bit too often.
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  #10  
April 18th, 2012, 07:56 AM
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I find it funny, ds1 has tantrums often these days because he's been sensative, and I do chuckle at them (I would rather chuckle without him seeing I'm doing that than to sit there and get annoyed and let it bother me). I wouldn't videotape it though and post it on the internet.
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  #11  
April 18th, 2012, 08:19 AM
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I have no problem with the way the father handled it. My 2 y/o son is very tempermental and has fits like that over the smallest things. If anything videotaping it can show the little girl at a later time how ridiculous her behaviour was.
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  #12  
April 18th, 2012, 09:03 AM
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How cute. When she's trying to convince her dad that the bowl is too heavy, it reminds me of my 10 year old son. When its his turn to vacuum, he has to stop about 10 times to "take a break" because his "arms are tired." I'm surprised he hasn't given up on that excuse yet as its never gotten him out of the chore and it takes him twice as long to finish.

Back on topic, I think dad handled it fine. He was very encouraging and I thought his tone of voice was great.
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  #13  
April 18th, 2012, 09:50 AM
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I must have 'distressed' my son's back too by having him help clean up after edging the yard

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  #14  
April 18th, 2012, 10:02 AM
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At least he has a smile on his face.....or is that a grimace of pain?
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  #15  
April 18th, 2012, 10:06 AM
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You evil mean mom you. You should be rubbing his back and telling him how he shouldn't have to do a chore ever again. lol
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  #16  
April 18th, 2012, 10:24 AM
fluffycheeks's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I have several videos of my kids having tantrums. My son (now 6) loves watching one of him having a fit when he was about 3 1/2. I wouldn't post them on the internet though.
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  #17  
April 18th, 2012, 12:49 PM
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Her little act IS funny. But the dad doesn't exactly deserve kudos for "remaining calm" from me. She wasn't doing anything that would warrant he not remain calm. So I don't quite understand those comments.

I don't coddle my kids either, but I do recognize a very overly tired little kiddo and don't really find those are the best times for life lessons. The story is a bit different with older kiddos. That doesn't make him a bad person, or warrant some of the comments after the video. I just don't think I'd tape something like that.
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  #18  
April 18th, 2012, 01:10 PM
plan4fate's Avatar I may bend, but not break
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Frackel View Post
Her little act IS funny. But the dad doesn't exactly deserve kudos for "remaining calm" from me. She wasn't doing anything that would warrant he not remain calm. So I don't quite understand those comments.

I don't coddle my kids either, but I do recognize a very overly tired little kiddo and don't really find those are the best times for life lessons. The story is a bit different with older kiddos. That doesn't make him a bad person, or warrant some of the comments after the video. I just don't think I'd tape something like that.
When I pulled crap like that it usually involved a screaming mother, and if it went on for more than 5 minutes a slap on the butt. I STILL didn't get out of doing the chore and the process repeated, on a shorter time frame.

So ya, the father gets kudos for remaining calm since it's obvious this has been going on a while before he eve gets the camera.


Life doesn't stop when you are tired. I'm sorry, but it doesn't. I'd not have lifted a finger since I was probably her age if it did. Sometimes life sucks and you have to do things that are expected of you when you don't want to do them. Be it hungry, or tired, or thirsty, or sore. Learning it early in a way that's not going to physically hurt you is probably the best way to get it part of the routine as early as possible.

Reme is 6 and pulls these stunts with as much furor as that little girl. Why? because he's never had to do it before and suddenly he has to take his plate and cup to the kitchen. He's tired, his belly hurts, his head hurts, his arms are broken.. you name it we've heard it. I would expect the behavior out of a 3 year old, but not at 6 going on 7. Not for something that trivial. Cleaning his room maybe.
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  #19  
April 18th, 2012, 01:45 PM
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Oh good grief. Of course life doesn't stop when you're tired, no matter what age you are, lol. This is basically a toddler we're talking about here though. Not a grown adult, not even a school aged child. I'm not saying we shouldn't ever make kids do things they probably don't want to, simply because they're tired. I just don't happen to believe every single instance of overly tired induced fit throwing is prime time for a life lesson. Time and a place, and all that jazz, that goes double for younger kiddos.

Are you ALWAYS going to make your child do something when they don't want to, in every single instance? I highly doubt that. I don't know anyone who does. Sometimes, you simply won't win that argument, no matter how much you want to. Sometimes, you might realize your efforts are futile. Sometimes there might be something else going on that while seems like a typical tantrum at first, doesn't end up being it. Sometimes you might just not be up for a fight that moment either. It's not a big deal. Life isn't going to end if you don't always make a child do what you want them to do, when you want them to do it. You're not going to harm your child by doing this, on occasion.

Just because you had a ****** mom who screamed at you and then decided to get physical because she couldn't keep her cool doesn't make that behavior normal, or right. Nor does it mean not behaving that way, deserves kudos. I don't give kudos to parents who behave rationally towards their children during things, like I see in that video. It's not like that girl is totally out of control or doing something that would make most parents want to pull their hair out. He might get a kudos if she was really out of control, but.. umm, she's not even remotely out of control there. Just overly tired. That's not even a real tantrum on my radar, lol.
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  #20  
April 18th, 2012, 01:49 PM
Tammyjh's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ~Tithen~ View Post

Reme is 6 and pulls these stunts with as much furor as that little girl. Why? because he's never had to do it before and suddenly he has to take his plate and cup to the kitchen. He's tired, his belly hurts, his head hurts, his arms are broken.. you name it we've heard it. I would expect the behavior out of a 3 year old, but not at 6 going on 7. Not for something that trivial. Cleaning his room maybe.
Depending on the child, it can happen at just about any age and for any reason.
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