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  #1  
April 27th, 2007, 09:27 PM
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Other threads have got my mind wandering. I know that some countries are very open about sex and sexuality. The human body isn't something that is viewed as something that needs to be covered at all times. Sex is seen as a natural and wonderful part of life.

In the U.S. we seem so much more closed off to sexuality and the beauty of the human body. This is part of the reason why women are ridiculed for BF in public. We have to view everything about the human body as sexual and anything as sexual as needing to be dealt with behind closed doors.

Funny thing is that we are one of the more prudish countries when it comes to what is allowed to be seen of TV yet according to the data I found we have the highest rate of teen pregnancy per capita.

http://www.nationmaster.com/graph/hea_tee_...ancy-per-capita

I wonder if the teenage pregnancy rate is so high because we make sex seem as if it is something forbidden which makes teens curious or rebellious.

Here is a link to Planned Parenthood that offers some suggestions.
http://www.plannedparenthood.org/news-arti...gnancy-6239.htm

So why are we so squeamish when it comes to sexuality but other nations embrace it?
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  #3  
April 27th, 2007, 10:00 PM
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I know that I can be prudish too. I saw the video in that other thread and I thought..."I wouldn't want to see that in the middle of the afternoon while sitting with my family."

I just wonder where so many (myself included) in the U.S. came by their prudishness! So many other cultures seem so open.
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  #4  
April 28th, 2007, 12:55 AM
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As you know (from my other thread) Im in a country (mallorca) that is very liberal.After 15 years here,I have got used to it and I used to find it refreshing,especially when I heard how things were in other countries (where everything in censored etc),but I must admit that I think people have taken their sexual freedom to extremes that are making us resemble wild animals!
I actually think that a little control (just like you have in America) should actually be aplied here too,because as a mother,I find it disturbing kwim?
Here,we (not meaning me of course) encourage kids to grow up too quickly and get them interested in sex way to young..Its everywhere! You cant turn on the TV without someone having sex on it anymore.
On every TV show some one has to show some skin (and I dont mean a leg) or make out with someone else,our stores sell slutty clothing for girls under 10 and encourage them to be "sexy" ,some of our TV ads contain sex scenes or mention sex (what does a couple having sex have to do with chocolate!!??) and now our music videos are starting to resemble soft core porn too!
It seems like people just seem to do apauling things because they can,not because its necesary or because its something they really want to do..its all about getting peoples attention and each day things are pushed a little further and I really dont know where this will take our kids,but Im scared to death!
Example:I know girls who have had so many sexual partners and tried so many different things by the age of 15,that they get bored and start experimenting with other girls,they even start trios etc..they claim they arent lesbians or bisexual,they do what they do because "theres nothing wrong with it"..do you see my point?
I caught a young girl (my neighbours 13 year old daughter) with her panties down to the floor and getting oral in our comunity garage once..and she didnt act embarresed or ashamed..she actually rolled her eyes and said "what does it take to get some privacy around here!!!"..she was standing right outside the lift door!! what did she expect!? I was so embarresed and disgusted that DH saw it!!
Because so much sex is allowed and rammed down our throats at every avablable moment,people are way to over sexed in my opnion..and the more outrageous people act,the more people applaud them for being so uninhibited (sp?) and free...This has gone way beyond being free,its disgusting!
Being squeemish and tasteful isnt a bad thing to me..infact,I think thats how things should be here too!!!
It takes alot to protect my kids from seeing all this stuff..I seem to have the disney channel on 24/7 because its the only way I know they arent seeing anything obscene
I say,embrace what you have
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  #5  
April 28th, 2007, 06:23 AM
::er!ca::'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I'm not squeamish at all. I mean, I don't want to sit down and watch a porno... because that is simply something I'm not into. However, if a TV program or a movie I'm watching has a sex scene, no problem there! That doesn't bother me at all.

Of course I monitor the things Brinlee watches, but that is no big deal to me either. She is totally into cartoons and Disney movies right now... so I don't have too much to worry about
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  #6  
April 28th, 2007, 10:08 AM
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I agree that other countries do go too far. It just seems weird to me that countries that are more open sexually actually have lower teen pregnancy rates. Maybe it's because teens there are doing things like that girl you mentioned (lol, can't get preggo that way!).

I wish we could be a bit more open here. I don't think sex should be seen as something forbidden or to be ashamed of.
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  #7  
April 28th, 2007, 12:15 PM
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Quote:
I don't think sex should be seen as something forbidden or to be ashamed of.[/b]
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  #8  
April 28th, 2007, 01:32 PM
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I love a good porno .... in the right circumstance. But I was totally put off with the school introducing puberity to my 9 year old. He is not ready and now that is all he talks about. He now has asked questions now with his sister's (16 month year old) private area. It is human nature but why the schools have to push it is beyond me.
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  #9  
April 28th, 2007, 01:36 PM
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Quote:
I love a good porno .... in the right circumstance. But I was totally put off with the school introducing puberity to my 9 year old. He is not ready and now that is all he talks about. He now has asked questions now with his sister's (16 month year old) private area. It is human nature but why the schools have to push it is beyond me.[/b]
Because kids are having sex younger and younger. Children seem to be going through puberty a lot younger too. I think 9 is a good age to start to learn about this stuff in an age appropriate way.
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  #10  
April 28th, 2007, 01:37 PM
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I think I was 9 or 10 (4th grade) when we had the "girl's assembly." We got the whole period talk and I remember knowing a few girls that already had theirs at that age.
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  #11  
April 28th, 2007, 01:39 PM
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I think I was 9 or 10 (4th grade) when we had the "girl's assembly." We got the whole period talk and I remember knowing a few girls that already had theirs at that age.[/b]
Exactly. There is a NEED to do it so young these days.Girls can start their periods at age 9 (my two cousins did) wet dreams can come about early for some males too.
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  #12  
April 28th, 2007, 01:46 PM
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Quote:
Quote:
I think I was 9 or 10 (4th grade) when we had the "girl's assembly." We got the whole period talk and I remember knowing a few girls that already had theirs at that age.[/b]
Exactly. There is a NEED to do it so young these days.Girls can start their periods at age 9 (my two cousins did) wet dreams can come about early for some males too.
[/b]

Guess I am prudish in this area, which is kind of fun because I have never been accused of being a prude. I also was not happy with both of my son's learning about drugs in kindergarten. Again I guess I am a prude. I started my period when I was 10 (same age as my son) and did not have a film and survived. My mom did not talk to me either.

I, in personal experience, never thought about having sex until I was in junior high. I had better thing to do. I also had a sister that got pregnant at 14 and knew that no boy was going to get anywhere near me until I was ready.
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  #13  
April 28th, 2007, 03:46 PM
mommyKathyX3
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Honestly, I'm not sure how I feel about the whole sexual stuff on tv thing. I know for me personally, its a battle, cause I believe that sex should be restricted for marriage or at LEAST a strong commited relationship, and all the stuff on tv makes it seem like sex is as common as giving a handshake. keep in mind this is coming from a christian perspective, but we had a foreign exchange student that was 17 come visit from Spain, and when we were speaking of modesty and the whole "true love waits" thing, she was completly BAFFLED. She told us that she never heard that sex was sacred, and she said any time she went out with somebody they almost always had sex. It was not a big deal. Like the same way we would give a goodnight kiss. She said in her area sex was not a big deal. I realize we were coming from the conservitive side, but that is excessive.

Now I think that the reason the USA has such a high teen pregnancy rate is because there is a lack of EDUCATION and IRRESPONSIBLE sexuality going on. We have all these teens "not feeling like" using condoms, and/or not using any kind of birth control cause of so many things. I'm not sure about this, but I think I've heard that its just expected in most foreign countries to use condoms and other birth control in general. I think thats what contributes to the lower pregnancy numbers. I'm a bit intrigued now to look up some actual info on that.

edited to add: I think that the whole topic of sexuality starts very VERY early. I will never sit down and have "the talk" with my kids cause its a continual learning process. Chloe knows some things, Julia knows some things. Neither knows everything obviously, but its a continual thing to be taught in parts when I think they are ready. Like Julia knows about a period cause even though she is only 6, the doc suspects she may have pre-puperty tendancies and since I started my period at 9, its easy that she could start in the next year or two.
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  #14  
April 28th, 2007, 03:52 PM
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The link in my OP to planned parenthood does mention the fact that some other countries better educate their children about sexuality. Here in the U.S it is always a big battle about sex education.
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  #15  
April 28th, 2007, 04:47 PM
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Quote:
Honestly, I'm not sure how I feel about the whole sexual stuff on tv thing. I know for me personally, its a battle, cause I believe that sex should be restricted for marriage or at LEAST a strong commited relationship, and all the stuff on tv makes it seem like sex is as common as giving a handshake. keep in mind this is coming from a christian perspective, but we had a foreign exchange student that was 17 come visit from Spain, and when we were speaking of modesty and the whole "true love waits" thing, she was completly BAFFLED. She told us that she never heard that sex was sacred, and she said any time she went out with somebody they almost always had sex. It was not a big deal. Like the same way we would give a goodnight kiss. She said in her area sex was not a big deal. I realize we were coming from the conservitive side, but that is excessive.[/b]
Thats what I mean...here in Spain,no one thinks of sex as something you should save for someone you love anymore..Just liking someones shoes seems to be a good enough reason to let him inside you .I dont beleive in waiting until marriage,but I do beleive that you should at least have strong feelings for the person you are giving your self to kwim? (lust shouldent count).This is how people are educating their kids
Here,sex is as common as a hand shake,its all part of being super modern and no one apreciates it or thinks of it as something intimate and beautiful these days.Its more of a "get on,get in and get out" experience The way I see it,this has caused romance to totally disapeer and be forgotten,because no one saves anything special for that certain someone any more..theres no thrill of the chase,and these days no one goes steady or commits themselfs to anyone else,I dont understand how all that dating stuff goes anymore because here,people dont date! They sleep with each other for long periods of time,but unless someone says so,they arent exclusive..which means they can still see other people..then they go from that,to either splitting up,or getting married..the whole in between part is gone Its just sex sex sex and more sex!!
People are having sex before they even know each others names..and no one is going to buy the cow if you are giving milk away kwim?
(my nanas favorite saying lol)
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  #16  
April 28th, 2007, 06:10 PM
::er!ca::'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
edited to add: I think that the whole topic of sexuality starts very VERY early. I will never sit down and have "the talk" with my kids cause its a continual learning process. Chloe knows some things, Julia knows some things. Neither knows everything obviously, but its a continual thing to be taught in parts when I think they are ready. Like Julia knows about a period cause even though she is only 6, the doc suspects she may have pre-puperty tendancies and since I started my period at 9, its easy that she could start in the next year or two.[/b]
Do you not think they are going to learn things from their peers as they get older? My niece is 9 years old, she has learned from peers at school about sex and more details than I could ever even imagine knowing at her age. She definitely didn't learn it from her parents, and she admits that other girls (and boys) talk about it at school, during recess, on bathroom breaks, before and after school, etc.
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  #17  
April 28th, 2007, 07:43 PM
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I remember asking my mom when I was in 3rd grade how a baby got into a mom's tummy. She gave me a very age appropriate talk and added to that as I got older.

Now, I did hear an awful lot from other kids especially once I hit middle school. I remember the first time I heard about oral sex (something my mom had not told me about) I was so grossed out. I remember saying to my friend ....EEEEEWWWWWWW I will never put on of those in my mouth!!!!!!!
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  #18  
April 28th, 2007, 07:47 PM
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Quote:
Quote:
edited to add: I think that the whole topic of sexuality starts very VERY early. I will never sit down and have "the talk" with my kids cause its a continual learning process. Chloe knows some things, Julia knows some things. Neither knows everything obviously, but its a continual thing to be taught in parts when I think they are ready. Like Julia knows about a period cause even though she is only 6, the doc suspects she may have pre-puperty tendancies and since I started my period at 9, its easy that she could start in the next year or two.[/b]
Do you not think they are going to learn things from their peers as they get older? My niece is 9 years old, she has learned from peers at school about sex and more details than I could ever even imagine knowing at her age. She definitely didn't learn it from her parents, and she admits that other girls (and boys) talk about it at school, during recess, on bathroom breaks, before and after school, etc.
[/b]
I think she meant that the sex education that she provides to her children will not be condensed into one big "the talk" event. Instead that it will be a continual discussion throughout their childhood and as they mature. I am planning the same kind of thing with my children. I had "the talk" when I was 14 and that was the one and only time my mother talked to me about sex. And it was the "when two people are in love and married they have sex and they have babies. Any questions?" talk. She just means that it will be an ongoing discussion that will become more and more detailed as they mature.
Sorry to speak for you jbcrmommy, correct me if I am wrong.
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  #19  
April 28th, 2007, 09:08 PM
mommyKathyX3
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
edited to add: I think that the whole topic of sexuality starts very VERY early. I will never sit down and have "the talk" with my kids cause its a continual learning process. Chloe knows some things, Julia knows some things. Neither knows everything obviously, but its a continual thing to be taught in parts when I think they are ready. Like Julia knows about a period cause even though she is only 6, the doc suspects she may have pre-puperty tendancies and since I started my period at 9, its easy that she could start in the next year or two.[/b]
Do you not think they are going to learn things from their peers as they get older? My niece is 9 years old, she has learned from peers at school about sex and more details than I could ever even imagine knowing at her age. She definitely didn't learn it from her parents, and she admits that other girls (and boys) talk about it at school, during recess, on bathroom breaks, before and after school, etc.
[/b]
I think she meant that the sex education that she provides to her children will not be condensed into one big "the talk" event. Instead that it will be a continual discussion throughout their childhood and as they mature. I am planning the same kind of thing with my children. I had "the talk" when I was 14 and that was the one and only time my mother talked to me about sex. And it was the "when two people are in love and married they have sex and they have babies. Any questions?" talk. She just means that it will be an ongoing discussion that will become more and more detailed as they mature.
Sorry to speak for you jbcrmommy, correct me if I am wrong.
[/b]
You got it exactly Stacey!

edited cause I spelled your name wrong
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  #20  
April 29th, 2007, 05:52 AM
::er!ca::'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Ok!!! I'm really sorry, I was so confused. I totally read that wrong. My apologies, and thanks for clearing that up
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