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What are your reasons for having a child?


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  #2  
April 30th, 2007, 04:16 PM
Carly's Mama's Avatar formerly JackieGerhardt!
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Location: Utica, NY
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I have one right now... and honestly, she was an oops. I was on Yaz and we used condoms but somehow it happened. I'm so glad it did though, she really saved my life.
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Mama to Carly Evelyn (01/05/07)
and
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  #4  
April 30th, 2007, 04:31 PM
Carly's Mama's Avatar formerly JackieGerhardt!
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Quote:
She saved your life? How? If you dont mind me asking..[/b]
not at all! I was having a bad time in college - I was sexually assaulted on campus and no one at the college wanted to do anything about it, even though I was an RA at the time. There's a strong history of depression/anxiety and bipolar disorder on my maternal side, and I was having those problems but I guess I wouldn't admit it to myself and I just kinda gave up. I got worse and worse and wouldn't accept help from anyone. I dropped out of school and began cutting pretty badly - I was just on this total path to self-distruction. I was smoking 2 packs a day, cutting myself to ribbons, I think I was probably headed to taking my own life, I was just so confused, miserable, and in a lot of emotional pain.

Being pregnant forced me to get help, and take care of my mind and body for the sake/health of my baby. I got into intense counseling, quit smoking completely, really got back on track and then had her. Now I have been smoke free and have not cut or anything in over a year - I got on good anti-anxiety medication, and I'm returning to school in the fall to finish my bachelor's. I feel she really did save my life!!
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Jackie, wife to Carl
Mama to Carly Evelyn (01/05/07)
and
Alexander Richard, born 10/21/09 via emergency c/s
8lbs, 7 3/4 oz
20.5"






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  #6  
April 30th, 2007, 04:37 PM
Carly's Mama's Avatar formerly JackieGerhardt!
Join Date: Feb 2007
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
She saved your life? How? If you dont mind me asking..[/b]
not at all! I was having a bad time in college - I was sexually assaulted on campus and no one at the college wanted to do anything about it, even though I was an RA at the time. There's a strong history of depression/anxiety and bipolar disorder on my maternal side, and I was having those problems but I guess I wouldn't admit it to myself and I just kinda gave up. I got worse and worse and wouldn't accept help from anyone. I dropped out of school and began cutting pretty badly - I was just on this total path to self-distruction. I was smoking 2 packs a day, cutting myself to ribbons, I think I was probably headed to taking my own life, I was just so confused, miserable, and in a lot of emotional pain.

Being pregnant forced me to get help, and take care of my mind and body for the sake/health of my baby. I got into intense counseling, quit smoking completely, really got back on track and then had her. Now I have been smoke free and have not cut or anything in over a year - I got on good anti-anxiety medication, and I'm returning to school in the fall to finish my bachelor's. I feel she really did save my life!!
[/b]
Good for you for getting the help you needed!!! That is awesome!!
[/b]
thanks! and YES, your baby IS so cute!! Beautiful eyes!!!
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Jackie, wife to Carl
Mama to Carly Evelyn (01/05/07)
and
Alexander Richard, born 10/21/09 via emergency c/s
8lbs, 7 3/4 oz
20.5"






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  #7  
April 30th, 2007, 04:55 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 2,224
Isn't it just wonderful how having a baby makes you want to be a better person, and makes you want to make the world a better place?
What a wonderfully positive outcome!

To the OP, I have kids, and lots of 'em! LOL! People ask me often why I (well, 'we') have so many. It really a difficult thing for me to answer in a short and simple way. We are Catholic, but that alone is not why we have many children. It was learning WHY the Catholic Church teaches what she does concerning matters of marriage and family that led us to this beautifully chaotic lifestyle. We have grown in our understanding of this area so much while living it, and it just keeps getting better and better. Even the seemingly 'bad' stuff isn't as bad as some would think. My husband and I feel called to this vocation, and we feel called to live it to it's fullest.

PHEW! See, I told ya I couldn't give a short and simple answer, and that's all just off the top of my head!
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~Lisa, homebirthing, homeschooling , homesteading mama and student midwife. Married to my beloved for 20 years, raising a big brood of children on a little farm in Southern Michigan.

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Nick, 19
Abby, 17
Gabe, 15
Isaac, 13
Mary-Kate, 12
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Mark, 7
Greta, 5
Cecilia, 4
Josephine, 2
Evie, born 12.31.13
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  #8  
April 30th, 2007, 07:20 PM
Xtine's Avatar Hip Fresh & Famous
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 6,304
i just had my first child in february. my husband and i have been together for 8.5 years and married for 4. we waited until we were mature and financially stable enough to try for children and, luckily, it didn't take long to get pregnant.
we would like to have two more children, at most three more, but we will wait a year before trying again.

our reason for having her: our biological clocks started ticking? lol i don't know how to explain it really, we both REALLY wanted a baby, and we both want more. we want to pass on our genes, or something of that nature!
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  #9  
April 30th, 2007, 07:32 PM
mommyKathyX3
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Thats what I felt called to do? I dont know, thats the best answer I feel. I cant say any one reason, its that I know I was put on this earth to be a mom.
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  #10  
April 30th, 2007, 08:00 PM
irishxrose
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Joshua was totally unplanned. But he also saved my life. I was a very bad teen, and I did a lot of stuff I'm not proud of. Being pregnant forced me to get the proper care and help I needed, and forced me to grow up and start acting like an adult. I finished high school because of my son... if it wasn't for him, I don't know where I'd be.

But anyways, I decided to have him because I knew that I could not get an abortion. I just couldn't do that. I know that I was really young, but I had to take personal responsibility for my actions or I knew I would regret it my entire life. I'm so glad that I decided to have him... he is my heart and soul.
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  #11  
April 30th, 2007, 08:12 PM
mommyKathyX3
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Quote:
Joshua was totally unplanned. But he also saved my life. I was a very bad teen, and I did a lot of stuff I'm not proud of. Being pregnant forced me to get the proper care and help I needed, and forced me to grow up and start acting like an adult. I finished high school because of my son... if it wasn't for him, I don't know where I'd be.

But anyways, I decided to have him because I knew that I could not get an abortion. I just couldn't do that. I know that I was really young, but I had to take personal responsibility for my actions or I knew I would regret it my entire life. I'm so glad that I decided to have him... he is my heart and soul.[/b]
I'm glad you made that desision also. Kids are amazing. They change us in so many ways!
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  #12  
April 30th, 2007, 09:54 PM
Niamh ૐ's Avatar Green Mama Goddess
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Quote:
Thats what I felt called to do? I dont know, thats the best answer I feel. I cant say any one reason, its that I know I was put on this earth to be a mom.[/b]
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  #13  
May 1st, 2007, 06:53 AM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 5,120
Quote:
Quote:
She saved your life? How? If you dont mind me asking..[/b]
not at all! I was having a bad time in college - I was sexually assaulted on campus and no one at the college wanted to do anything about it, even though I was an RA at the time. There's a strong history of depression/anxiety and bipolar disorder on my maternal side, and I was having those problems but I guess I wouldn't admit it to myself and I just kinda gave up. I got worse and worse and wouldn't accept help from anyone. I dropped out of school and began cutting pretty badly - I was just on this total path to self-distruction. I was smoking 2 packs a day, cutting myself to ribbons, I think I was probably headed to taking my own life, I was just so confused, miserable, and in a lot of emotional pain.

Being pregnant forced me to get help, and take care of my mind and body for the sake/health of my baby. I got into intense counseling, quit smoking completely, really got back on track and then had her. Now I have been smoke free and have not cut or anything in over a year - I got on good anti-anxiety medication, and I'm returning to school in the fall to finish my bachelor's. I feel she really did save my life!!
[/b]
Jackie!

Mattea was also an oops baby...and a life saver!

I was doing drugs, I had dropped out of school...I had no personal responsibility. Never paid my bills. Didn't give a crap about anything, seriously depressed, just an angry, bitter person... When I got pregnant, it forced me to turn my life around and become a better human being. Now that Mattea is here, I don't know how I woke up each morning without her. She is my joy, the love of my life, my everything Gosh, sometimes just looking at her makes me cry, I'm tearing up right now thinking about her! I truly believe that I was put on this earth to be her mommy!
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  #14  
May 1st, 2007, 11:14 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Peterborough, Ontario
Posts: 2,646
When DH and I got together I knew there was a possibility of us not having children. He was born with severe scoliosis/spinabifida and throughout the years had had MANY x-rays. Due to that, doctors feared DH would have a difficult time "creating" a baby. Dh was 30 at the time and felt it was time to start our "long" journey of trying. Plus with his disability as the years go by his back will continue to get worse until he can no longer walk! Well to our surprise, the first month we tried, we got pregnant!! Haha! I guess God really wanted us to have a child. My husband refers to our son as his "miracle"!!
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  #16  
May 1st, 2007, 07:54 PM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
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We have seven children- five on earth, one in heaven, one in utero. Not all were planned, but those were surprises and not accidents. A surprise is something you didn't know you wanted until you got it.

Quote:
My kids are truly my saving grace, all of them (my lost baby included). Each one of them has brought me a unique sense of joy, love, and hope that had been previously unknown to me (which, I think applies to everyone). Each pregnancy has brought struggles, sadness, and pain; but I tend to stand by the phrase 'that which does not kill you, makes you stronger'. Each one has built upon my character, and IMO, for the better.[/b]
I might have said this, but not as eloquently. Beautiful.
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~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 20 Raechel: 18 Daniel: 15 Joseph: 13 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 7 Lucy Marie: 5 John Anthony: 2 AND Baby due Dec. 2015

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w); Francis (7-4-12 @12w); Charlie (1-19-15 @ 6w)


Congratulations Raechel and Kaleb, married May, 2015

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  #17  
May 2nd, 2007, 05:27 AM
Platinum Supermommy
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Posts: 5,120
Quote:
I have three children.

I didn't TTC with any of them intentionally, though technically, since I was not on birth control with my first, it could be argued that I was TTC. I was on various forms of bc for my second, third and fourth pregnancies.

I decided to have my children because....well, mainly because they are my children, innocent of any wrongdoing. I also felt the need to take personal responsibility as hard as that may be (and believe me, it is hard).

My kids are truly my saving grace, all of them (my lost baby included). Each one of them has brought me a unique sense of joy, love, and hope that had been previously unknown to me (which, I think applies to everyone). Each pregnancy has brought struggles, sadness, and pain; but I tend to stand by the phrase 'that which does not kill you, makes you stronger'. Each one has built upon my character, and IMO, for the better.

I was in an extremely abusive relationship for just under 5 years (father of my children). If it were not for my children, I am almost positive I would have stayed, and more than likely killed. When I left that man, it was truly for them, not me. Of course, now I also see that I did not deserve the abuse, but in the mindframe I was in at the time, I couldn't (or wouldn't) accept that as truth. Like I said, my children are truly my saving grace.

David was my 'wake-up' call. He was the reason I got my G.E.D. in under 3 weeks. He was the reason I got on birth control.

Devin. He is the reason I found courage.

Olivia brought me reality. She brought me hope, too.

And Jude...set in stone my appreciation for life.[/b]
Awww darn you Cece you made me cry!
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  #18  
May 2nd, 2007, 05:33 AM
lotus86's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I have one child, but she was my second pregnancy. I had a m/c before after a car accident caused me to screw up on my bcp's. With Ryleigh, I was using the Today sponge, and DF and I came home from my cousin's wedding rather drunk and I forgot to put the sponge in I am like mega fertile, it only takes one oops for me to get pregnant which is why we are UBER careful now! She was not planned, but as soon as I found I was pregnant, after the "oh #### what do we do!?!" phase, I knew that I was going to have her. I considered abortion which I hate to admit, only because I was being pushed towards that choice by family members. Luckily, we were living with DF's mom at the time, and she was thrilled and really kept my spirits up when my family was unsupportive. I knew that we could do it, and we have! We moved into our condo when I was 5 months pregnant and we've been here since. All my old friends think that I'm missing out on my life, but I think they are the ones who are missing out I wouldn't change my life as a mom for anything.
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  #19  
May 2nd, 2007, 05:44 AM
paganempath
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My daughter was an oops. I had always suspected before I was pregnant and since I've had my baby it's been confirmed-- I wasn't meant to be a mother. My daughter is well taken care of and always treated with kindness but I just don't have the emotiional stability that she needs. You know that overwhelming feeling of love that everyone feels for their children? I don't feel it. And that's how I know I should never have been a mother.
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  #20  
May 2nd, 2007, 08:43 AM
EmilysMommy04's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Emily wasnt planned. She kinda happened the first time her father and I yeah you know. We were married after that. Then a lil while later we were trying to have a baby but surprise she was already growing inside. She is the love of my life
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