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"All moms are working moms"


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  #1  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:20 AM
quietsong's Avatar Just Another Slacker Mom
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I'm not sure if this is more debate or just question. I keep running into the phrase "all moms are working moms." Now, all right, I get that people want it recognized that SAHM work very hard to run their home and raise their children. It's very true and I applaud women who stay at home! However, what then do you call moms who work out of the home? It's one of those semantics things that I honestly don't get. I think, in a setting like this, everyone knows that "working mom" means someone with a job outside the home and "SAHM" means someone who does not... But I may be wrong about that...

Can someone explain it to me?

I'm proud that I am both a career woman and a mother ... I would love to have a blinkie, but every time I see "all moms are working moms" I feel like I can't because it will offend people and they'll suddenly think I don't think being a SAHM is hard work in itself ...

I really hope no one gets offended by this, that isn't my intent...
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  #2  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:24 AM
MrsCalhoun's Avatar Ryan Lover
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i am a sahm and would not get offended by a working mother having that blinkie. Working moms work just as hard as non working moms, and therefore we are all equal. I honestly never really noticed the difference... i could easily place a working mom blinkie in my siggie, and it would be truthful. That's just me though.

edit cause omg i can not spell today
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  #3  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:24 AM
SusieQ2's Avatar Jersey Girl
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I know what you mean. I always try to be careful how I word those types of things because I don't want to offend anyone. I realize that all moms are working moms. Usually, when I use the term working mom I mean someone who works outside the home but I don't mean it in a negative way against SAHMs.
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  #4  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:31 AM
::er!ca::'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I think that all moms are working. That is just my opinion. Some moms work in the home, some moms work outside of the home. The same hours that a mom is working outside of their home, a SAHM is working in their home caring for their child(ren). Caring for children is not- not a job, in my opinion. Do you (general, not directed towards anyone in general) consider babysitting a job? So what difference does it make if the child(ren) belong to the mother or not?

I think mothers who work out side of the home and mothers who stay at home should both be proud of what they do and neither should feel that their "job" makes them more superior, or better, in any kind of way.
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  #5  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:40 AM
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I 100% see no difference between a SAHM and a working mom. A working mom to me means someone who works (inside or outside of the home). You could in fact, say "mom" to me and it would imply the same exact thing. My job IS my child and my house, at the moment. To strip me of the term "working" implies that...I don't.
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  #6  
May 2nd, 2007, 10:52 AM
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And see, that may be part of where individual perception comes into play. IMO, there is a LOT involved in the word "mom" that goes beyond the biological birthing of a child. To label anyone as a mom, to me, immediately means they work hard to raise their children, do the best they can for them, teach them right from wrong, care for them, etc. Adding "working" in front of it strictly means they have a job outside the home as well. I only use the term "working mom" when compared to "stay at home mom," the using "working" and "stay at home" merely to indicate what they put down on their tax forms, for lack of a better term than, say, "job status" which again falls into the grey area here.

O/T - OceanChild, I just saw the note in your siggy about no cigarettes since April 15, way to go!! That's awesome!
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  #7  
May 2nd, 2007, 11:06 AM
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Quote:
And see, that may be part of where individual perception comes into play. IMO, there is a LOT involved in the word "mom" that goes beyond the biological birthing of a child. To label anyone as a mom, to me, immediately means they work hard to raise their children, do the best they can for them, teach them right from wrong, care for them, etc. Adding "working" in front of it strictly means they have a job outside the home as well. I only use the term "working mom" when compared to "stay at home mom," the using "working" and "stay at home" merely to indicate what they put down on their tax forms, for lack of a better term than, say, "job status" which again falls into the grey area here.

O/T - OceanChild, I just saw the note in your siggy about no cigarettes since April 15, way to go!! That's awesome![/b]



This.
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  #8  
May 2nd, 2007, 11:14 AM
Caeden'sMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
I'm not sure if this is more debate or just question. I keep running into the phrase "all moms are working moms." Now, all right, I get that people want it recognized that SAHM work very hard to run their home and raise their children. It's very true and I applaud women who stay at home! However, what then do you call moms who work out of the home? It's one of those semantics things that I honestly don't get. I think, in a setting like this, everyone knows that "working mom" means someone with a job outside the home and "SAHM" means someone who does not... But I may be wrong about that...

Can someone explain it to me?

I'm proud that I am both a career woman and a mother ... I would love to have a blinkie, but every time I see "all moms are working moms" I feel like I can't because it will offend people and they'll suddenly think I don't think being a SAHM is hard work in itself ...

I really hope no one gets offended by this, that isn't my intent...[/b]
I think the point is raising children IS a job. Otherwise, "true" working moms wouldn't be paying someone else to do it while they're at work. Being unemployed is one thing. But being unemployed while having children is different in my opinion, because instead of working outside the home, you're working in it...
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  #9  
May 2nd, 2007, 11:28 AM
quietsong's Avatar Just Another Slacker Mom
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Quote:
I think the point is raising children IS a job. Otherwise, "true" working moms wouldn't be paying someone else to do it while they're at work. Being unemployed is one thing. But being unemployed while having children is different in my opinion, because instead of working outside the home, you're working in it...[/b]
What, then, would a more correct term be for those who work outside the home as well? Because ITA that raising children is a job (though I 100% disagree that I am paying someone else to raise my children, but that is a different debate) and that SAHM work inside the home.
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  #10  
May 2nd, 2007, 11:36 AM
Caeden'sMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Quote:
I think the point is raising children IS a job. Otherwise, "true" working moms wouldn't be paying someone else to do it while they're at work. Being unemployed is one thing. But being unemployed while having children is different in my opinion, because instead of working outside the home, you're working in it...[/b]
What, then, would a more correct term be for those who work outside the home as well? Because ITA that raising children is a job (though I 100% disagree that I am paying someone else to raise my children, but that is a different debate) and that SAHM work inside the home.
[/b]
WOHM? A;though truly, i'm not really arguing with the usage of working mom vs. SAHM. Just explaining the reasoning behind saying "all moms are working moms".

As for the raising children comment, i said WHILE THEY'RE AT WORK, so please don't get offended... Especially since i'm about to be working and putting my son in daycare here soon myself, so i promise i'm the last person to judge...
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  #11  
May 2nd, 2007, 11:43 AM
quietsong's Avatar Just Another Slacker Mom
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WOHM? A;though truly, i'm not really arguing with the usage of working mom vs. SAHM. Just explaining the reasoning behind saying "all moms are working moms".

As for the raising children comment, i said WHILE THEY'RE AT WORK, so please don't get offended... Especially since i'm about to be working and putting my son in daycare here soon myself, so i promise i'm the last person to judge... [/b]
I'm less debating and just curious myself. WOHM would work well - I'm kind of surprised it isn't what is used, it would be a good counterbalance to SAHM!

And I'm totally not offended. "Raising children" is just another one of those semantics things, which is ironic how I view one term one way and the other another - I guess just based upon most common usage. I know there was no judgment or malice or anything in it.

Best of luck when you start work! It's a tough transition but very rewarding.
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  #12  
May 2nd, 2007, 11:46 AM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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actually its WAHM

WAHMs typically have a job in which they are paid, SAHM's do not,
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  #13  
May 2nd, 2007, 11:47 AM
quietsong's Avatar Just Another Slacker Mom
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I thought WAHM was work at home mom - BensMom who used to frequent First Time Mommies worked from home and called herself a WAHM.
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  #14  
May 2nd, 2007, 11:49 AM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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ok so what term are you guys looking for then, cause i'm lost!
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  #15  
May 2nd, 2007, 12:00 PM
Caeden'sMama's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
ok so what term are you guys looking for then, cause i'm lost![/b]


Okay, so here's how i understand it: SAHM = Stay At Home Mome. WAHM = Work At Home Mom. WOHM = Work Outside the Home Mom. Make sense now?
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  #16  
May 2nd, 2007, 12:06 PM
Lash's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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ok got it!

would it be WHOOM?
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  #17  
May 2nd, 2007, 12:07 PM
quietsong's Avatar Just Another Slacker Mom
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ok so what term are you guys looking for then, cause i'm lost![/b]
An alternate to "working mom" (generally used to describe women who work outside the home and have children) since that seems to have offensive connotations to SAHM.
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  #18  
May 2nd, 2007, 12:38 PM
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First if you see the all moms are working moms blinkie put it up if you want to. 2nd being a SAHM is hard. I was a manager at 2 places. The first job i would go to at 6am then get out at 3pm then I would go to work from 3:30- 11:30 at night. This was before I had my daughter. I did these 2 manager postions 6 days a week. Now that I have become a mom I must, say those 2 postions were way easier then being a SAHM. Dr. Phil did a study and a SAHM is equal to 2 full time jobs. There is so much more to it then feeding the kids. There is laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, putting the bill payments out , cooking , feeding the kids, bathing dressing, ect ect . To those who say its easy come to my house and spend the day with my 2 girls lol then you will see lol. All moms are Working Moms. I have nothing against working moms I say hey to each there own. It doesnt bother me one bit.
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  #19  
May 2nd, 2007, 01:28 PM
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Honestly, I don't think you could truly compare the difficulty of the 2 different situations without identifying what each woman does/is expected to do each day. The age and temperment of the children would have to be taken into consideration as well.

I think the bottom line is that at the end of the day, either woman could be potentially drained of energy from the day's hard work, or feel particularly rewarded from a productive day. How could we ever truly compare the two fairly?
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  #20  
May 2nd, 2007, 01:39 PM
jodi16ss's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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First if you see the all moms are working moms blinkie put it up if you want to. 2nd being a SAHM is hard. I was a manager at 2 places. The first job i would go to at 6am then get out at 3pm then I would go to work from 3:30- 11:30 at night. This was before I had my daughter. I did these 2 manager postions 6 days a week. Now that I have become a mom I must, say those 2 postions were way easier then being a SAHM. Dr. Phil did a study and a SAHM is equal to 2 full time jobs. There is so much more to it then feeding the kids. There is laundry, grocery shopping, cleaning, putting the bill payments out , cooking , feeding the kids, bathing dressing, ect ect . To those who say its easy come to my house and spend the day with my 2 girls lol then you will see lol. All moms are Working Moms. I have nothing against working moms I say hey to each there own. It doesnt bother me one bit.[/b]
I would have to disagree when it comes to my current situation. Whoever said it would depend on each individual case is sooo right. I was a SAHM two years ago and I would have to say it is much easier than being a WAHM. I get my preschooler dressed and fed in the mornings, and my infant dressed and nursed.. drop the infant off at my parents' house and then take my son to preschool... drive 45 minutes to work.. come home, pick them both up. Cook dinner.. bathe and get them both in their pjs.. play/read, etc. Then do all of my cleaning/bill paying, etc. (sigh).. I loved being a SAHM. I wish we could still afford it! Haha! I think it definitely depends on each individual situation.
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