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  #1  
May 11th, 2007, 02:16 PM
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What do you think is the best response if a child (under 18) is disrespectful? Like calls mom a B@#$% or calls dad a (some other swear word). Or says "I hate you!" Etc. Or says "F#@% you" to their parent?

What about kids/teens who swear a lot (but not AT their parents or other family members). How would you handle that?
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  #2  
May 11th, 2007, 02:22 PM
Pure Innocence
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Quote:
What do you think is the best response if a child (under 18) is disrespectful? Like calls mom a B@#$% or calls dad a (some other swear word). Or says "I hate you!" Etc. Or says "F#@% you" to their parent?

What about kids/teens who swear a lot (but not AT their parents or other family members). How would you handle that?[/b]
For the first, I'd have family counseling.

For the second....I swore LOTS as a teen, but never at my family members or around them. I wasn't damaged in any way.
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  #3  
May 11th, 2007, 02:24 PM
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If my child swears at me I swear they better know how to run a 7 minute mile... because I am going to be the end of that phase... if I were to swear at my mom to this very day she would slap my jaw... I don't approve of it... I swear but my kids won't swear at me...
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  #4  
May 11th, 2007, 02:50 PM
M4NE's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
What do you think is the best response if a child (under 18) is disrespectful? Like calls mom a B@#$% or calls dad a (some other swear word). Or says "I hate you!" Etc. Or says "F#@% you" to their parent?

What about kids/teens who swear a lot (but not AT their parents or other family members). How would you handle that?[/b]
I think that this is a learned behavior. They either learn it from their parents/family members, their friends, or TV/movies/radio. My oldest used the f word once, when he was 2-2 1/2. We sat down and had a talk about how that was a dirty word and it made his mouth dirty when he used it. (I found out later he had heard it from my BIL) If when my kids are older, they use these words, I will look at what I say in front of them, their friends' language, and what they are watching and listening to as far as TV/movies/music. I will also talk to them about how that type of language isn't appropriate. But you've got to start teaching them when they are young that this isn't acceptable. You can't wait until they are preteens/teens to teach them. Not saying that they won't ever swear, but at least they will have been taught that it's wrong.
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  #5  
May 11th, 2007, 04:45 PM
rdhdtrue's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Quote:
What do you think is the best response if a child (under 18) is disrespectful? Like calls mom a B@#$% or calls dad a (some other swear word). Or says "I hate you!" Etc. Or says "F#@% you" to their parent?

What about kids/teens who swear a lot (but not AT their parents or other family members). How would you handle that?[/b]
I think that this is a learned behavior. They either learn it from their parents/family members, their friends, or TV/movies/radio. My oldest used the f word once, when he was 2-2 1/2. We sat down and had a talk about how that was a dirty word and it made his mouth dirty when he used it. (I found out later he had heard it from my BIL) If when my kids are older, they use these words, I will look at what I say in front of them, their friends' language, and what they are watching and listening to as far as TV/movies/music. I will also talk to them about how that type of language isn't appropriate. But you've got to start teaching them when they are young that this isn't acceptable. You can't wait until they are preteens/teens to teach them. Not saying that they won't ever swear, but at least they will have been taught that it's wrong.
[/b]
So you do not think they come out of the womb swearing? Sheesh I was scared.

The oldest (Gabe) has said one swear word in front of us and we let him know it was not allowed and he has not done it since. He also is only 10 so we will see how it goes from here. I will not tolerate swearing. As many things when they are 18 they can do what they want if they are no longer living in my house but until then it is my house and my rules.

I called a neighbor a b*st*rd when I was 11. I did not know what it meant but I was sent to my room and explained what it meant and never used it again.
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  #6  
May 11th, 2007, 05:16 PM
Lisadear's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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let's just put it mildly and say .... kiddo had better learn to run and run FAST .... cause honestly I may be tempted to floor him/her in a flash for sassing me like that!!!!!!

xxx Lisa xxx
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  #7  
May 11th, 2007, 05:50 PM
M4NE's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
What do you think is the best response if a child (under 18) is disrespectful? Like calls mom a B@#$% or calls dad a (some other swear word). Or says "I hate you!" Etc. Or says "F#@% you" to their parent?

What about kids/teens who swear a lot (but not AT their parents or other family members). How would you handle that?[/b]
I think that this is a learned behavior. They either learn it from their parents/family members, their friends, or TV/movies/radio. My oldest used the f word once, when he was 2-2 1/2. We sat down and had a talk about how that was a dirty word and it made his mouth dirty when he used it. (I found out later he had heard it from my BIL) If when my kids are older, they use these words, I will look at what I say in front of them, their friends' language, and what they are watching and listening to as far as TV/movies/music. I will also talk to them about how that type of language isn't appropriate. But you've got to start teaching them when they are young that this isn't acceptable. You can't wait until they are preteens/teens to teach them. Not saying that they won't ever swear, but at least they will have been taught that it's wrong.
[/b]
So you do not think they come out of the womb swearing? Sheesh I was scared.

The oldest (Gabe) has said one swear word in front of us and we let him know it was not allowed and he has not done it since. He also is only 10 so we will see how it goes from here. I will not tolerate swearing. As many things when they are 18 they can do what they want if they are no longer living in my house but until then it is my house and my rules.

I called a neighbor a b*st*rd when I was 11. I did not know what it meant but I was sent to my room and explained what it meant and never used it again.
[/b]
Yeah, okay....I had a "DUH" moment....Sorry. I've got a sick baby and am running on very little sleep. Guess I should probably stay away from the computer for a while, huh...
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  #8  
May 11th, 2007, 09:07 PM
mommyKathyX3
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Last weekend we saw a kid 2nd-3rd grade say to his mom who was talking to another lady at the time "MOM, get me a GOD-DA**ED POP, RIGHT NOW!" and she told her friend, "sorry, I better go get him that" and then apologized to the kid! OMG! What the heck is going to happen to society if that kind of disrespect is allowed?
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  #9  
May 11th, 2007, 09:30 PM
Jacquie's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Without knowing the situation, I'm not willing to jump on this bandwagon. A parent does not automatically deserve the respect of his/her children simply by bringing the child in to the world. If I watched a teenager get verbally abused by her mother for years and one day the girl snaps and says F-you to the mother or calls her a b!tch, I'm not so sure I would have a problem with it. No, it doesn't accomplish anything, and yes, there are a lot of other things that need to happen in that situation, but I'm not willing to crucify the teenager for giving a little back of what she had been receiving.

I think that the responses in this debate are based on people wondering what they would do if their own children said these things to them, knowing in their own head that they deserve more respect than that from their children. I agree with most of the responses if the respect has been earned, but I can definitely think of situations where I wouldn't blame the teenager for lashing out like that.
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  #10  
May 11th, 2007, 09:40 PM
mommyKathyX3
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It bothers me sometimes when teens do it, but what REALLY gets to me is when I see kids that are like 10 talking to thier parents like that. It really depends on the type of stuff they are saying also.
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  #11  
May 12th, 2007, 04:01 AM
Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Last weekend we saw a kid 2nd-3rd grade say to his mom who was talking to another lady at the time "MOM, get me a GOD-DA**ED POP, RIGHT NOW!" and she told her friend, "sorry, I better go get him that" and then apologized to the kid! OMG! What the heck is going to happen to society if that kind of disrespect is allowed?[/b]
How rude. This kid would get a serious talking to if it were me. She's not his servent.
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  #12  
May 12th, 2007, 05:03 AM
Lisadear's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Without knowing the situation, I'm not willing to jump on this bandwagon. A parent does not automatically deserve the respect of his/her children simply by bringing the child in to the world. If I watched a teenager get verbally abused by her mother for years and one day the girl snaps and says F-you to the mother or calls her a b!tch, I'm not so sure I would have a problem with it. No, it doesn't accomplish anything, and yes, there are a lot of other things that need to happen in that situation, but I'm not willing to crucify the teenager for giving a little back of what she had been receiving.

I think that the responses in this debate are based on people wondering what they would do if their own children said these things to them, knowing in their own head that they deserve more respect than that from their children. I agree with most of the responses if the respect has been earned, but I can definitely think of situations where I wouldn't blame the teenager for lashing out like that.[/b]
total ditto to the above!

my kids are teen and preteen ... pretty cool ... I would admit I've heard them slip up with swearing speaking to each other and I just go "AHEMMMMMMMM" and they go "OOOOOOPS" lol .... I don't sweat the small stuff

They certainly know better than to speak to me or any other person in authority that way ... and I've explained to them that even among their friends it's not usually respectful so hopefully when they're alone hanging out they behave

Jacquie's right ... respect is earned ... not something demanded

xxx Lisa xxx
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