Log In Sign Up

Woman freezes her eggs so she can have a baby after her career


Forum: Heated Debates

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Heated Debates LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
May 12th, 2007, 09:24 AM
ChasingClio's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Pennsylvania
Posts: 611
Story

What do you think of this?
__________________
Kim: MA in History finally accomplished May 2010!, Wife to Alan, a Washington DC firefighter, Mommy to Savannah (9-15-04), Felicity (2-17-08), and Samson (1-8-09)
Reply With Quote
  #2  
May 12th, 2007, 09:43 AM
Cereal Killer's Avatar I'm climbin' in yo window
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: next to Chuck Norris
Posts: 7,373
Fine by me. I wouldn't want to have a baby in my 50s or 60s, but to each their own.
__________________
Wife, Mother of 4, Homeschooling, and wine drinking.


Reply With Quote
  #3  
May 12th, 2007, 09:51 AM
Lisadear's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Trinidad
Posts: 20,622
Send a message via MSN to Lisadear Send a message via Yahoo to Lisadear
hey if it works for her then ok ... not for me but that's just my own take on it for myself

xxx Lisa xxx
__________________
xxx Lisa xxx<div align="center">

</div>
Reply With Quote
  #4  
May 12th, 2007, 09:57 AM
SusieQ2's Avatar Jersey Girl
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 39,051
I don't think it's something I would do. Personally, I tend to think it is selfish to have a child that late in life. I think the child is sometimes robbed of having their parents for as long as they could or they miss out on certain experiences that children with younger parents have. This of course is not to mention the health risks to both mother and child to get pregnant that late in life.
__________________





Reply With Quote
  #5  
May 12th, 2007, 11:44 AM
donomama
Guest
Posts: n/a
Quote:
I don't think it's something I would do. Personally, I tend to think it is selfish to have a child that late in life. I think the child is sometimes robbed of having their parents for as long as they could or they miss out on certain experiences that children with younger parents have. This of course is not to mention the health risks to both mother and child to get pregnant that late in life.[/b]

I agree. Plus, I think she's pretty naive if she thinks that a half dozen frozen eggs will guarantee a baby. In vitro with younger women has a pretty small chance of implantation. If she's in her 50's and 60's and only has 6 eggs to work with - good luck.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
May 12th, 2007, 04:11 PM
*kyle*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 5,117
I don't see anything wrong with this. Really, they are her eggs and she can do what she wants with them. I'm not even sure why this is considered news. What about men who choose to have children very late in life? Just because men are fertile till the day they die, I really don't see any news stories about how those men are selfish or are depriving their children of a parent, etc.
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #7  
May 12th, 2007, 04:56 PM
SusieQ2's Avatar Jersey Girl
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: New Jersey
Posts: 39,051
Quote:
I don't see anything wrong with this. Really, they are her eggs and she can do what she wants with them. I'm not even sure why this is considered news. What about men who choose to have children very late in life? Just because men are fertile till the day they die, I really don't see any news stories about how those men are selfish or are depriving their children of a parent, etc.[/b]

I feel the same way about men who choose to have children so late in life. My next door neighbors years ago were older parents. They had 3 children that were pretty much grown when along came another one. The kid hated having older parents and was always complaining about it. He heard his brothers and sister talk about all of the things they did with their parents when they were kids. He never got the same opportunities because they just weren't able to do those things anymore. He was also constantly mistaken as their grandson.

As for the woman in the story, if she has a child at age 50 she will be 68 by the time the kid graduates from high school! I just don't think that is very fair to a kid.
__________________





Reply With Quote
  #8  
May 12th, 2007, 05:32 PM
mommyKathyX3
Guest
Posts: n/a
I think its just asking for complications to wait till you are that age. Its not usually easy being pregnant when you are in your 20-30's let alone when your in your 50's. Whatever though. Its her risks. People do it "naturally" and it works out, but it just seems like a silly mentality.
Reply With Quote
  #9  
May 12th, 2007, 06:32 PM
Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 18,680
She may have frozen 9 eggs, but the fact remains that she's over 35 and egg quality over 35 deminishes, so it's almost like she's putting "all her eggs in one basket" (sorry...couldn't resist the pun! ) There's still no real data as to the thawing stats and whether the eggs are good quality, or were free from genetic abnormalities that comes with "advanced maternal age" (i.e. Downs, Trisomy 18, etc).

I have no real issue with somebody trying to preserve their fertitility for later years and I believe to each their own when it comes to having children at an older age. It's not for me, but it's her choice. The issue I have with this trend is the scientific data isn't there and I think it's giving false hope to women since eggs are tricky to thaw. You have a better chance of freezing an embryo than a water soluable egg. I think if she really wants a decent chance of having a successful thaw rate she should undergo the procedure a few more times and freeze more eggs. I know the thaw rate for women who under go IVF and they're happy to have a couple of embryo's thaw, and this women is expecting all of them to be just fine. I think she's being a bit naive with the whole process.
__________________
Thank you Claire1977 for my adorable siggy
For the special little one in your life!
Reply With Quote
  #10  
May 12th, 2007, 07:11 PM
frgsonmysox's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Offutt AFB, NE
Posts: 19,799
Send a message via AIM to frgsonmysox Send a message via MSN to frgsonmysox Send a message via Yahoo to frgsonmysox
Quote:
"And I vowed not to make the mistake of having a family too early in life."[/b]


I really don't like the idea of women past menopause having babies. I think at that point your ship has sailed. Nature is telling you that you are too old to have kids.
__________________
~Beth~ Wife to my Airman Chris, and mommy to: Anthony Nathaniel (8/31/04), Anastasia Fae (8/01/06), Baby C (lost on 10/12/07), David Cillian (7/31/08), Charles George (4/29/10), and Alan Christopher (2/22/12)





My BLOG - A Day In The Life of a Freg (it's a little bit of everything!)
Reply With Quote
  #11  
May 12th, 2007, 07:12 PM
rose198172's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 19,638
Well, good luck to her, but I think it's risky to begin with -- only six eggs? Wow.. that seems like a low number to me.

It also seems like she's asking for complications, because I know that I have no plans to have kids after 35, because of the increased risk.

My grandmother died at 72... if I followed the same patter, and I were to have kids at age 60, I'd be leaving my 12 year old behind.
__________________
Writer, Navy wife, autistic mom of two autistic kids (E is 6, C is 5).

Reply With Quote
  #12  
May 14th, 2007, 05:41 AM
Veteran
Join Date: Oct 2005
Posts: 195
My parents were told they couldn't have kids. So they never used protection and for 16 years, never got pregnant. They adopted my cousin and then became pregnant with my brother. Two years later they got pregnant with me. They were both in the late 40's when they became pregnant. I can understand what you mean by the parents not being able to do certain things with the kids because of their age. However, my parents always took us on vacations yearly and did a lot of various activities with my brother and myself (my adopted brother left to live with his birth mother at 16). Both of my parents worked and my brother and I entertained each other (building clubhouses and whatnot) through childhood and we had a lot of babysitters. I didn't know there was a difference between younger parents and older parents when it came to raising a family. Heck, I used to brag to my friends that my parents were older than theirs hahaha. I'm 27 and my parents are both 65. They have lived to see their first grandchild and the second is on the way.

For some people, it's not a choice as to them getting pregnant. My parents were thrilled to have their own children though. I think if someone has control over it, they should try not to wait too long. As long as they are financially capable of course. There are days I worry about my parents health, but I still live by the mentality that my parents will live forever.
__________________
<div align="center">


</div>
Reply With Quote
  #13  
May 14th, 2007, 07:13 AM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 14,288
Send a message via Yahoo to jhmomofmany
There has to be at least some major differences between having a baby in your late 40's and having a baby in your early- to mid- 60's. But I can't tell you how many times I've heard of couples finally adopting after years of TTC, and then getting pregnant! I think that is rather humorous!

Going back to the OP, to me it is not only the selfishness, but the presumption of it all. She assumes she can have her brilliant career and then have her perfect child exactly according to plan. Those of us who are subject to the rules of the real world know that things can happen. This is really childish and I'm sorry, but it would serve her right if the IVF doesn't work.
__________________
~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 4 and John Anthony, 1!!

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


I've lost 60 pounds, and I'm stronger than ever! No gimmicks, no BS, just exercise, nutrition, and support from the awesome Fitness and Weight Loss board here at JM!! Click the blinkie to join us!



Reply With Quote
  #14  
May 14th, 2007, 10:05 AM
littleln's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,145
It is totally irresponsible and selfish. I would have no respect for anyone who used in vitro to get pregnant after age 50.
__________________

Thanks to pattiandthemoos for the great siggy!



<div align="center"></div>

<div align="center"></div>
Reply With Quote
  #15  
May 14th, 2007, 11:22 AM
*kyle*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 5,117
Quote:
There has to be at least some major differences between having a baby in your late 40's and having a baby in your early- to mid- 60's. But I can't tell you how many times I've heard of couples finally adopting after years of TTC, and then getting pregnant! I think that is rather humorous!

Going back to the OP, to me it is not only the selfishness, but the presumption of it all. She assumes she can have her brilliant career and then have her perfect child exactly according to plan. Those of us who are subject to the rules of the real world know that things can happen. This is really childish and I'm sorry, but it would serve her right if the IVF doesn't work. [/b]
I see where you're going with this, but I would never wish infertility on anyone, or for the expense and stress of IVF to fail. Yes, I agree she's being naive, but if her IVF fails and her "plans" are ruined, then I think that would be punishment enough. I would feel really bad for her.
__________________


Reply With Quote
  #16  
May 14th, 2007, 12:12 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 2,667
I actually thought about doing this--not seriously but it did cross my mind! I was 21 when I got a job with the state and could have retired with full benefits at age 46. But that seemed way too old for me to plan on starting a family so DH and I didn't go that route. I can see maybe waiting until your 40s, but not 50+.
__________________




Reply With Quote
  #17  
May 14th, 2007, 02:23 PM
picklesmama's Avatar <;,><
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 22,604
I see nothing wrong with it. if she's physically in good enough health to carry a baby in her 50's then more power to her. Who's to say her uterus will still be an ideal environment for carrying a child at that age - it may not "take" - I don't know anyhting about the medical part of it, whther a woman can even carry a baby after menopause - if she can, then why shouldn't she be a mother? I think to say that she will be too old to do things with her child is ageism! How do you now what kind of physical fitness she is/will be in?! My mother is 57 and in better physical shape than many of my husbands co-workers wives who are in their 30's! She eats healthy, doesn't smoke, exercises daily, and can keep up with me and my 4 kids no problem - in fact I have named her in my will as guardian of my children should something happen to hubby and I. Now if she were a crotchety frail old 60, then I doubt she wuld even be a candidate for the implantation, and it wouldn't be an issue. But if she's a vital and physically able 60, why not? She will be able to provide her child with financial security, and plenty of time since she won't have to work - again I see nothing wrong with it.
__________________

Crissy mama to Jack 7.16.01 ~ Mia Bella 10.29.02
Angus Pickle 2.24.04 ~ Sydney Bean 10.26.06 & Kater Tot 2.15.09

Looking for fun lunch ideas for kids? Check out my blog: BentOnBetterLunches!
Reply With Quote
  #18  
May 14th, 2007, 08:05 PM
rdhdtrue's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: St. Louis MO
Posts: 5,202
Send a message via Yahoo to rdhdtrue
My Mom was 40 and my Dad was 45 when I was conceived. I did not miss out on anything but possibly my children did. I just can not judge people unless they do it for greed. As long as they love the children then that is more than some receive.
__________________
Miss Dani has Hurler's Syndrome (MPS1) and had a Bone Marrow Transplant 11/09/2006. Check out how she is doing here http://danicaboni.blogspot.com
Reply With Quote
  #19  
May 14th, 2007, 08:25 PM
donomama
Guest
Posts: n/a
Quote:
My Mom was 40 and my Dad was 45 when I was conceived. I did not miss out on anything but possibly my children did. I just can not judge people unless they do it for greed. As long as they love the children then that is more than some receive.[/b]

This is something I think about all the time. My inlaws were in their 40's when my DH was born. They are now in their 70's, and I worry that they will die before my kids are old enough to remember them.
Reply With Quote
  #20  
May 15th, 2007, 05:26 AM
babyreaves's Avatar Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Andersen Air Force Base, Guam, U.S.A.
Posts: 575
My mom got remarried to my stepdad and even though he said having us girls as daughters was fine by him, my mom wanted to give him a child and so my mom got pregnant with my half-brother when she was 40 and my stepdad was 33 (Yes my mom is a pimp...haha...j/k) and my brother has more than I ever did growing up because my mom is well established in her career now and with his older sisters in college, he gets tons of one on one time with my mom. Yes, the risks were higher but I can't imagine not having my little brother around. 60 is a little old, but like the PP said to each her own.
__________________
<a href="http://lilypie.com" target="_blank">
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 12:40 PM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0