Log In Sign Up

Fear of Childbirth?


Forum: Heated Debates

Notices

Welcome to the JustMommies Message Boards.

We pride ourselves on having the friendliest and most welcoming forums for moms and moms to be! Please take a moment and register for free so you can be a part of our growing community of mothers. If you have any problems registering please drop an email to boards@justmommies.com.

Our community is moderated by our moderation team so you won't see spam or offensive messages posted on our forums. Each of our message boards is hosted by JustMommies hosts, whose names are listed at the top each board. We hope you find our message boards friendly, helpful, and fun to be on!

View Poll Results: Do you think your fear or labor affected your birth?
Yes 10 19.23%
No 36 69.23%
Other 6 11.54%
Voters: 52. You may not vote on this poll

Reply Post New Topic
  Subscribe To Heated Debates LinkBack Topic Tools Search this Topic Display Modes
  #1  
May 15th, 2007, 07:17 PM
donomama
Guest
Posts: n/a
I have been reading a lot on these debates how women are scared into doing things regarding childbirth - pain meds, c sections, inductions, etc. I am just wondering how you all feel about this. Please answer the poll questions and discuss.
Reply With Quote
  #3  
May 15th, 2007, 07:27 PM
lotus86's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Annapolis, MD
Posts: 3,759
Send a message via AIM to lotus86 Send a message via Yahoo to lotus86
I voted very, other, very, no. I was educated on every part of childbirth. I am kind of a voracious person when it comes to education so I read and read and read the entire time I was pregnant. I was still scared. I knew all the risks of epidural and was still planning to get it when or if the pain became too much to deal with. I think that helped with some of the fear, knowing that the pain relief would be there if I chose to use it. I didn't plan to have a birthing method, I was just going to go with the flow, and have my music and my focal points and take the rest as it came. (<-- I know to many that probably doesn't sound educated, but I'm a go with the flow person and after reading about different birthing methods I decided they wouldn't be a good fit for me) Now, the reason I chose other for the second question is because after all of that, I never had a moment of labor. I had an emergency c/s at 40 wks 5 days. I was very satisfied with my birthing experience, because the end result was a healthy baby. I have absolutely no regrets, and I often shudder to think "what if" I hadn't had the c/s. And I said no because I was actually not afraid of the section, so I didn't feel that fear had an impact on the process. I was afraid for my baby since she was in distress but I knew everything would go smoothly and I had the best medical care I could ask for.
__________________
<div align="center"><div align='center'></div><div align="center"></div></div>
Reply With Quote
  #4  
May 15th, 2007, 07:32 PM
mama2noah's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 4,005
i had a planned c-section due to baby size. before that was decided though, i did my research and felt well informed on both vaginal and c-section births. i knew that i wanted an epidural no matter what if i had a vaginal birth. i also knew what i didn't want as far as drugs and made this clear. i asked a ton of questions in my classes and with my dr especially after we agreed on a c-section. i was anxious before noah arrived but more just about the fact that my first child was about to be born and i couldn't wait to see him! i was maybe a little nervous about the epi, only cause i don't like needles! i had a great experience though. noah arrived safely, he "rode" with me back to the recovery room and stayed with us for about an hour, i was able to breastfeed right away, we got family time in that hour. then he went to the nursery for bath, measurements etc. by the time i went to my room, he was done with all of that and back in my arms.
__________________




Reply With Quote
  #5  
May 15th, 2007, 07:33 PM
donomama
Guest
Posts: n/a
With my first baby, I wasn't scared at all. I was very well educated, but I think I was a little naive on the pain factor. I had read about the level of pain associated with childbirth, but because I consider myself a pretty strong girl, I honestly wondered how bad it could really be. I am embarrassed to say now that I thought I would handle it much better than the average woman. Well, obviously, it hurt. There were a couple complications with my baby, but things turned out ok. After actually giving birth the first time, I was terrified the second time. I would watch footage of mothers giving birth and would end up sobbing out of fear. Going into the hospital, I remember thinking that I just couldn't do it. My second birth went perfectly. The pain was much more managable, and I really loved my experience. Judging from my experiences, I honestly can't say that fear affected my outcome negatively, because the birth I was more afraid of went much better.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
May 15th, 2007, 07:45 PM
Aeterna's Avatar Super Speshil
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: the edge of reason
Posts: 1,709
Very, what is there to be afraid of, very satisfied, no.

My birth experiencs have made me a believer in the power of positive affirmation and breaking the pain/fear cycle. I never feared giving birth, didn't look at it in a negative light. I had a very easy, smooth and fast labor with my first. I LOVED the birth of my second. It was totally awesome and naturally pain-free.

I look forward to giving birth during my pregnancies. It's a wonderful experience for me.

I hear visualization helps as well. The birth of my second was very close to how I envisioned it.
__________________
Aeon, mama to Grace, 12/04; Evangeline, 11/06; Duncan, 11/08 ; and Henry, 12/09. Ruby Matilda Rose due 12/1/14.




Reply With Quote
  #8  
May 15th, 2007, 08:04 PM
rose198172's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 19,638
The only fear I really had was just a simple fear of the unknown. I read a lot, and learned what to expect but didn't really know how I was going to react to it.

I went forward with an induction 5 days past my due date (a mistake I will not make again), knowing that there could be complications and/or risks, but ignoring the information I had. I was pressured into asking for pain meds (narcotics) once, and didn't ask again, because it really wasn't necessary (it just made me sick to my stomach and dizzy).

Overall, I was very satisfied with my birth experience, and hopefully this time around, I will be even more satisfied.
__________________
Writer, Navy wife, autistic mom of two autistic kids (E is 6, C is 5).

Reply With Quote
  #9  
May 15th, 2007, 08:18 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Location: Lafayette, Indiana
Posts: 4,213
I went back and forth throughout the pregnancy with fear of pain. I just told myself that there are 13 year olds that do this in 3rd world countries with no medication, I think I'll get through it somehow. I had an epidural but slept for a few hours and woke up feeling my contractions and they hurt. I had an epidural I could control by pressing a button, so I think I over did it some out of fear the pain would get worse.
__________________
Reply With Quote
  #10  
May 15th, 2007, 08:48 PM
mommyKathyX3
Guest
Posts: n/a
I voted how I felt with my first birth. Its TOTALLY different for the other two, but I was not ready for my first.
Reply With Quote
  #11  
May 15th, 2007, 09:32 PM
Dev Dev is offline
Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Midwest
Posts: 657
I believe very strongly that fear plays a big part in how you experience labor. Most of the women that I talk to that talk about how painful their labor was were the ones that planed to have an epidural as soon as they could. Often those women, for whatever reason, weren't able to get it as soon as they wanted it. I've never heard of a woman that planned on having an epidural but didn't get it say...nah it wasn't that bad. I do on the other hand often hear women that have had planned natural childbirths say that while it was intense, it was also manageble through the use of relaxation techniques.

I had no pain medication while giving birth. I was very informed through my reading and taking Bradley classes. I knew what to expect and while I wasn't afraid of the pain or the labor itself there were always fears of the what ifs and possible complications. When my contractions became intense I did find myself becoming a little scared especially durring transition. Having my husband reassure me that I was doing a great job and that everything was progressing perfectly helped me relax which made the contractions smoother.
__________________
<div align="center"> <MARQUEE WIDTH="100%" BEHAVIOR="scroll" SCROLLAMOUNT="5" DIRECTION="left"></MARQUEE></div>
Reply With Quote
  #12  
May 15th, 2007, 09:40 PM
mama2noah's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 4,005
Quote:
Very, what is there to be afraid of, very satisfied, no.

My birth experiencs have made me a believer in the power of positive affirmation and breaking the pain/fear cycle. I never feared giving birth, didn't look at it in a negative light. I had a very easy, smooth and fast labor with my first. I LOVED the birth of my second. It was totally awesome and naturally pain-free.

I look forward to giving birth during my pregnancies. It's a wonderful experience for me.

I hear visualization helps as well. The birth of my second was very close to how I envisioned it.[/b]
100% of topic but your daughter is beautiful and totally adorable!
__________________




Reply With Quote
  #13  
May 15th, 2007, 10:26 PM
bubblesispreggers's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Bristol, TN
Posts: 1,178
Send a message via Yahoo to bubblesispreggers
Quote:
I believe very strongly that fear plays a big part in how you experience labor. Most of the women that I talk to that talk about how painful their labor was were the ones that planed to have an epidural as soon as they could. Often those women, for whatever reason, weren't able to get it as soon as they wanted it. I've never heard of a woman that planned on having an epidural but didn't get it say...nah it wasn't that bad. I do on the other hand often hear women that have had planned natural childbirths say that while it was intense, it was also manageble through the use of relaxation techniques.

I had no pain medication while giving birth. I was very informed through my reading
and taking Bradley classes. I knew what to expect and while I wasn't afraid of the pain or the labor itself there were always fears of the what ifs and possible complications. When my contractions became intense I did find myself becoming a little scared especially durring transition. Having my husband reassure me that I was doing a great job and that everything was progressing perfectly helped me relax which made the contractions smoother.[/b]
ditto to the bold. Although I didn't know exactly how bad it would be, I knew it would be pretty bad but it didn't scare me. I knew that no matter how bad it hurt, it couldn't hurt for too long and when it was over I'd have a baby to show for it. I just had to remember that the pain would go away soon.
__________________
<MARQUEE WIDTH="100%" BEHAVIOR="scroll" SCROLLAMOUNT="5" DIRECTION="left">

</MARQUEE>
Reply With Quote
  #14  
May 15th, 2007, 11:28 PM
chlodoll
Guest
Posts: n/a
I wasnt scared. I had no real expectations about anything. I knew it was going to hurt, but I can handle a day of pain. I would say I was nervous, because I was induced 6 weeks early I didnt feel mentally prepared but I wasnt scared. My birth experience was fine but not what I wanted obviously.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
May 16th, 2007, 04:37 AM
jhmomofmany's Avatar Look! A Dancing Banana!
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Upper Michigan
Posts: 14,233
Send a message via Yahoo to jhmomofmany
My first birth experience I was 18, newly married, and he was coming 15 weeks early. I was completely unprepared, in a lot of pain, and certain that he would die. That fear really influenced my decisions regarding my second pregnancy and birth. After a horrible OB with my third, I started to do a little self-education, and that changed my whole outlook on birth. I am not afraid of it anymore, and I actually look forward to it.
__________________
~Jennifer, wife of one, mother of many

Robert: 18 Raechel: 17 Daniel: 14 Joseph: 12 Thomas: 10 Mary Mae: 6 Lucy Marie: 4 and John Anthony, 1!!

Always Missing our Angels: Hope (7-8-06 @36w) and Francis (7-4-12 @12w)


I've lost 60 pounds, and I'm stronger than ever! No gimmicks, no BS, just exercise, nutrition, and support from the awesome Fitness and Weight Loss board here at JM!! Click the blinkie to join us!



Reply With Quote
  #16  
May 16th, 2007, 05:19 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1,524
Quote:
ditto to the bold. Although I didn't know exactly how bad it would be, I knew it would be pretty bad but it didn't scare me. I knew that no matter how bad it hurt, it couldn't hurt for too long and when it was over I'd have a baby to show for it. I just had to remember that the pain would go away soon.[/b]

that is exactly how i felt. the pain would be over eventually and the reward was so great.
__________________
Proud Christian, Cloth diapering, Baby Wearing, Signing, Select vaxing, ERF, Extended Harnessing, attempted breast feeding mama to Cadence 2/01/02 Courtney 11/26/03 Kason 4/02/07 and Kaia 8/23/09And very proud Army wife to Smitty.



Reply With Quote
  #17  
May 16th, 2007, 06:33 AM
glasscandie's Avatar What I make is what I am
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Near Washington, DC
Posts: 15,982
Send a message via AIM to glasscandie Send a message via Yahoo to glasscandie
I was positive when I was pregnant that I would do fine with the LABOR part, and totally freak out for the pushing. The pushing part seemed much more painful to me than labor. I wasn't scared of the pushing though, it just seemed like something I wasn't particularly looking forward to lol

I did have a great birth experience - I did most of it naturally and opted for an epi two hours before DD was born, with no complications.

I feel like I was very educated on childbirth by the time I went into labor, because I was planning to do it totally naturally, so you sort of have to be educated for that. There was no shot, unless I or DD was dying, that anyone would have talked me into a c-section though lol
__________________
I predict a riot.
Reply With Quote
  #18  
May 16th, 2007, 06:41 AM
AnnaBananasMom's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 14,475
I was nervous, but not really afraid of labor. I decided early on (like before I was pregnant!) that I would get an epi. I know there are people who look down on that, but it gave me exactly the birthing experience I had hoped for. I researched my options and asked not to be completely numbed so that I could still feel the contractions and urge to push. I labored naturally for a few hours and the epi didn't take effect until I was about 8cm. The anesthesiologist was great and did exactly what I had asked. Once the epi went well, I had nothing left to be worried about. All I had to do was think about meeting my baby. I remember how quiet and calm it was in the room for the 20 minutes I pushed. All I had to do was push and greet my baby with open arms. I couldn't have asked for a better birth experience.
__________________
Rosalie, Mommy to Anna (05/06) and Thomas (10/08)


Video Montage of Anna's First Year
Reply With Quote
  #19  
May 16th, 2007, 09:32 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,925
I wasn't at all nervous with my first, I had a " This is going to be amazing, I can handle it attitude" but it still hurt like hell. If anything I was not prepared for the pain enough. Realistic expectations are needed for a good birth too. It is great to be positive but birth hurts and there is nothing wrong with being nervous about that.

The other two births I was not nervous at all and with my 4th I was but that was because I was scared of having her unattended due to my speedy labours.

If I could predict that I was going to scold my foot in a few hours time and feel an awful amount of pain I would be nervous, if I knew I was going to break my arm next week I would be nervous There is nothing wrong with fearing child birth to a certain degree.

I had a lot of knowledge and I also had no meds.
__________________
Mum to Ross, Elliot, Jack, Jasmine and Evie
Reply With Quote
  #20  
May 16th, 2007, 10:54 AM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Gainesville, FL
Posts: 2,306
I was really more excited than anything else! I remember thinking, "Wow, I really should be scared or nervous..." but I wasn't.

I did plenty of research while TTC and while pregnant, and knew in my heart that I made the best decisions for me. It also helped to have an OB and hospital nursing staff who were nothing but supportive of all of my choices. I got all of the information I needed while never feeling bossed, belittled or coerced in any way.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Topic Tools Search this Topic
Search this Topic:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 09:21 AM.



Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2014, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.6.0