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Spanking bare bums? is it ok


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  #1  
August 10th, 2005, 11:09 AM
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: Fairfax LA
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Hiya

I know to some this might seem like another spanking debate but I dont really wish to get involved too much in whether itis good or bad because my exeperience tells me that spanking obviously (only if used moderately)is fine.

My question was to do with dd Holly (4yrs). It isnt too often that im forced down that road, but sometimes a booty spanking is what I have to resort to before she finally acts up. Oh..a spanking to me is around 4-6 swats with my hand usually on her 'bare bottom'.

When speaking to 2 friends about this 1 said i shouldnt spank bare and the other said it was ok if done moderately.

Am i the only mom who spanked on the bare bum?

Katy
  #3  
August 10th, 2005, 03:08 PM
Elijah`zMomma's Avatar Regular
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After helpin raise my brother nd sister i don't think it is right to spank. i don't see what is solves but a more upset child. but this is my opinion
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  #4  
August 10th, 2005, 04:25 PM
Kelly's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I was spanked on my bare butt when I was little. I turned out fine (at least I think so, LOL) My brother & sister were not spanked and they are bratty kids! I love them, but man! BRATS!

I see no harm in doing something that has been done for centuries, has worked and not caused any problems for the kids themselves.
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  #5  
August 10th, 2005, 06:00 PM
EmilysMommy04's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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I feel that spanking is wrong I was spanked as a child alot. I had a violent streak due to that . All spanking does is reinforce violence. I refuse to hit my baby girl i mean smacking her patties is one thing but i am scared to death top spank her in the home i grew up in hitting was how our parents showed love. As I thought buit hitting doesnt show locve it shows anger and frustration . But everyone parents differently. I choose possitive reinforcement. I am not disrespecting anyone im just saying how it ios in my home. Take care everyone.
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  #6  
August 10th, 2005, 11:21 PM
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kelly@Aug 10 2005, 07:25 PM
I was spanked on my bare butt when I was little. I turned out fine (at least I think so, LOL) My brother & sister were not spanked and they are bratty kids! I love them, but man! BRATS!

I see no harm in doing something that has been done for centuries, has worked and not caused any problems for the kids themselves.
<div align="right"><{POST_SNAPBACK}>
[/quote]

thats exactly how it is/was with my brother, i was the one spanked he wasnt, but growing up who behaved better?

not all kids require the same kind of disapline, if thats what works for your child go ahead but it may not work for another
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  #7  
August 11th, 2005, 08:00 AM
bebe's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Quote:
Originally posted by Kelly@Aug 10 2005, 06:25 PM
I was spanked on my bare butt when I was little. I turned out fine (at least I think so, LOL) My brother & sister were not spanked and they are bratty kids! I love them, but man! BRATS!

<div align="right"><{POST_SNAPBACK}>
[/quote]

It was the same way at my house.
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  #8  
August 11th, 2005, 08:13 AM
sunshinealyssamichelle's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I personally believe that a spanking is sometimes essential, and on the bare butt. It happened in my home and I turned out fine. Everyone disciplines their child in a different way.

When it becomes a problem is when a parent is spanking their child out in the parking lot and the non-spankers (for lack of a better term) call the police or Child Protective Services because of child abuse. It's not a fine line, not even a line. Child abuse is not disciplining. It's something completely different. I think that people should mind their own business, unless it is obviously abusive behavior!
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  #9  
August 11th, 2005, 09:23 AM
megan
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I spank bare butt when nothing else works. usually it goes like this if he is doing something wrong he gets to #3 to stop, if he doesn't stop or does it again, he gets time out, if he does it again he gets a few spanks over the diaper, and if none of that works he gets a bare butt spank. Sometimes he is very hard headed about stuff and other times counting to #3 works. I was spanked bare butt growing up and do not see anything wrong with it.
  #10  
August 17th, 2005, 10:04 AM
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Spanking is hitting no matter how you slice it. Church it up all you want, it's still hitting a small child who can't defend herself. For those of you that were spanked as kids and now say you're fine --you grew up to think hitting your child is okay --i wouldn't call that fine.
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  #12  
August 18th, 2005, 05:49 PM
Kelly's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I agree, spanking is not abuse! Hitting your kid in the face or going any further than spanking is abuse, but you see so many spoiled kids today and we all wonder why. People have become overly sensitive of these things.

I don't ever recall thinking when I was little, "oh my, I'm a defenseless child and my evil mom is hitting me".

It was something my mom did when I was bad. You learn form it.
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  #13  
August 19th, 2005, 05:02 AM
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Yep ive also posted on this in the preschoolers section.

As a child, and yes I know this has kinda become corny, but i was spanked and it did me no harm whatso ever. Some people aree all too easily confused with spanking and abuse (2 very different things).
I have got 2 little girls (and 1 little boy on the way), and they are sweet little angels and yes i do spank their little bottoms.
I would only spank with a few slaps and yes i always do it with bare bums.
I can feel how hard the spanking actually is, instead of through a big layer of clothing. I dont do it as a means of embarrasemet but if that is a factor, then thats another reason for why they would best want to avoid that punishment, (it is a punishment, theyre not supposed to like it are they?).
My children are otherwise happy, well rounded kids.

Thnks
  #15  
August 19th, 2005, 09:49 AM
baccalynnwv's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Ayden gets spanked anywhere and as soon as he does something that requires him to be spanked. If he were being bad, he would have no idea why I waited to the bathroom to spank him. If he throws a fit inappropriately he gets a little spank on the back of his thigh.... because he is not even aware when you spank his diaper. LOL.....but he knows to straighten up. Now all I have to say to him is that he is going to get a whopping and that is usually all he needs.

I don't let people joke around that they are going to whip him because I want him to take it serious when it is said.

Also, he gets smacked on the hands for things that I don't have time to teach him are bad to touch. Like outlets, pulling knives out of the dishwasher (when I am loading or unloading), getting into cabinets with sharp objects, playing with fans. These things I don't have time to say, "now honey, that will hurt you." I want him to know immediatly that these things are not for him to touch.

There are times when I am absolutly to mad and aggrivated, and Ayden will do something that I just want to whip him and yell at him, but in those cases I usually just tell my husband to handle it or I call someone to come over for a little while so I can calm down and relax. I will not whip my son in red hot anger. At those times I need to re-evaluate myself.

But during those times that a spank is needed, alarmers can call CPS, the police, what ever....., I am going to raise my son (and daughter to be) the way the bible tells me to raise him. If I get sent to jail, someday my son will remember when I whipped him and why, and he is going to thank me for it.
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  #17  
August 19th, 2005, 11:01 AM
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my mom went WAY overboard with spanking. My youngest brother, you can hit with a belt til he's bleeding and he'll look at you like "is that supposed to hurt", because he's been beat so many times. He's still the biggest brat I know....

I'd much rather use spanking as a last resort, but use positive reinforcment
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  #19  
August 19th, 2005, 11:31 AM
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instead of spanking -- time outs, loss of priveledges, etc depending on this kids age.

When I was little, I learned more by standing in the corner [my dad's punishment], than by getting beat when I didn't act right, or something. I mean dang I know I did stuff when I was little that warent being beat, but no nearly as much as she did.

I mean, seriously, I got beat once because I forgot to bring my agenda home from school in 4th grade, I think it was like the 1st week of school, and we never had agenda's before, so I wasn't used to carrying it with me everywhere. Is, that really worth beating a kid for?

On top of that, MOST PEOPLE I KNOW PERSONALLY, having learned a darn thing from being beat. THey've learned more via lose of priveledge, time outs, grounding, etc.

Plus, in the form of beating I go is like 50+% less than what my youngest brother got. Its way to easy to go over board when spanking, esp if that runs in familys [my mom's dad's dad was physically abusive, her dad was].


EDIT TO ADD -- Certainly there is a time and place when spanking may be required, and isn't necceasry mean CPS needs to be involved. There is also a way that spanking should go about....esp not out of as somebody else said, "Red hot anger" and they should know why [as with any form of punishment] why what they did warrents that type of punishment.
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  #20  
August 19th, 2005, 01:54 PM
megan
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Quote:
instead of spanking -- time outs, loss of priveledges, etc depending on this kids age.[/b]
Personally, i try this, time out and loss of priveledges are basicly the same thing in our house because the apt. is so small there is simply nowhere to put toys he can't get to and turning off the tv or radio is only a small thing in his book, he could care less. So we try time out It works maybe 20% or less of the time. It just doesn't phase him (he will cry and act hurt but its an act). He is 2 years old so we have tried time out anywhere between 2 -10 min.

and like i said before we try this

- 1-2-3
-time out
-spanking on diaper (gets the clue across that next time it will be for real)
-spanking bare bum

but usually its one of the last two that does the job for him.
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