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  #1  
March 1st, 2012, 06:49 PM
shari626's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Delaware
Posts: 5,678
Didn't go so well. Her teachers basically told me that they are already teaching 7th grade material and just because she is learning it quickly/not challenged - they have to teach to the class as a whole - not to just Erin. So what is my kid supposed to do? If a child is struggling, teachers have to have revisions to lessons plans for inclusion. This is supposed to be to true for TAG children as well. Sadly, that's not the case. I told her teachers that she didn't like school. They thought maybe she was being bullied (ummmm no), or something was going on. Something is going on alright, she is not doing anything she doesn't already know how to do!!!! Now the team leader teacher (Erin's science teacher) wants the guidance counselor to talk to her. Her teachers were shocked <------ like this that she doesn't like school. "But she does so well!!" they say. Only because it's too easy.

I told her Erin two things are going to happen. The guidance counselor is going to want to talk to her. I told her to tell the truth. Tell the guidance counselor that you don't like school because you do your work and are ready to move on and no one else is. You already know how to do this material and you don't like it. She's asking so tell her the truth.

In the fall, Erin and I are going to do one of two things. #1 option - if my job is not renewed (Which is always a possibility) I am taking her out of school. We will homeschool. #2 OPTION : If I still have a job, we will tour every school in the area and find a better match for her. She will change schools ASAP. (Which technically won't be until 8th grade) We will be "afterschooling" in the meantime.
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  #2  
March 2nd, 2012, 05:16 AM
Butter's Avatar Heather the Mama Duk
Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: San Antonio TX
Posts: 28,853
That's really frustrating, but unfortunately I can't say I'm really surprised. It annoys me that they went right to she must be being bullied and needs to talk to the guidance counselor. All her fault. Definitely not the teachers or anything they are doing, right?
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  #3  
March 2nd, 2012, 06:05 AM
Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Andrews AFB, MD
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I'm sorry it didn't go well. We've had similar issues with Beth, although she is much younger. When I complain I get responses like "Well that is a great problem to have" and "You should just be thankful she isn't having trouble like so many other kids." I feel like it breeds laziness in a child to never have to put forth much effort though.

It sounds like your two back-up plans are good ones.
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  #4  
March 2nd, 2012, 09:43 AM
BensMom's Avatar Ephesians 4:29
Join Date: Apr 2005
Location: The Lonestar State
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The root of the problem is that this is what teachers are taught to do in college. An education degree doesn't teach you how to teach. It teaches you how to be an administrator in a classroom setting, how to follow orders, how to demand order, and how to cast your net so that most kids are caught. Some will fall through the cracks, but that's not your problem. That's the next teacher's problem.

People say the reason we're able to homeschool so effectively is because I have an education degree. Not! True! I don't use anything - at all - that I learned in college. In fact, I tried using my degree in a PS setting and hated it. I quit after only one year. I sought out the kids who were either great or struggling, and I helped them a lot, but the following year, when a new teacher came in, they were right back where they were. Of the two most memorable, one was a nobody, and the other was in jail for trying to burn down the school. Does that surprise me? Nope. (... by the way, the arsonist was only 11 years old. His parents were drunks, and his only food was what he could get from the school cafeteria. When I had him in class, it was his very first year in beginner band, but I took him to a practice room every chance I got and gave him college level music. He was that good!)

Last edited by BensMom; March 2nd, 2012 at 09:47 AM.
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  #5  
March 2nd, 2012, 10:10 AM
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I think that is an unfair assumption to say that most educators feel like kids who fall through the cracks are "not their problem." Most care very much. At times they are limited as to what actions they can take, but that doesn't mean they are uncaring.

I use my college degree and teacher certification all the time. Sorry to hear you didn't get much out of your degree.
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  #6  
March 2nd, 2012, 11:23 AM
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I'm sorry that the conference didn't go better. But like others, I'm not surprised. Schools cater to the masses so often the individual gets lost. If you fit outside the norm for any reason, it isn't good. To be honest, I have friends with special needs children & they feel their child doesn't get what they need either.

I do agree with clouise that most teachers care - at least the ones I've dealt with. Unfortunately they under the restraints by the school administration & the standardize tests. So unfortunate.

I recently had to fight to get Lucy a 504 plan because of her vision issues. They didn't want to give her one because she's an average student as far as grades & standardized tests go. The school pychologist kept saying she's "on the bubble" I had to explain that yes on paper she appears to be an average student. But she is an average student on paper because she is a gifted kid with a vision disability. If she didn't have the vision problems, she'd be well above average on paper. Thankfully her teacher agreed with me & we got the plan.
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  #7  
March 2nd, 2012, 11:59 AM
Butter's Avatar Heather the Mama Duk
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Quote:
Originally Posted by clouise View Post
I think that is an unfair assumption to say that most educators feel like kids who fall through the cracks are "not their problem." Most care very much. At times they are limited as to what actions they can take, but that doesn't mean they are uncaring.
That is true. Here there are rules against doing work more than x years (usually 1 in elementary and middle) advanced of the grade level. Doesn't matter what the teachers does or does not want to do.
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~Heather, wife to Jamie (15 years; June 5, 1998) and mom to
Ani - 14 (February 15, 2000), Cameron - 12 (October 3, 2001),
Fritz - 7 (July 11, 2006), and Adrian - 5 (June 19, 2008)
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  #8  
March 3rd, 2012, 04:16 PM
HS&Fsmom's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: NC
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Ohhh...

I haven't been online much but saw your post earlier last week and was thinking about you. I am so sorry. I hope Erin does tell the guidance counselor the whole truth because someone at the school needs to wake up. If a student came to me or another student services staff where I work, and disclosed that type of problem, you better believe we would be advocating for immediate changes in the child's classroom setting. But that's us... not everyone... unfortunately.

I am surprised she does not have a GEP (gifted version of IEP)? I am just learning about those this year but I believe they must be followed, at least here, like an IEP. We have students doing all kinds of differentiated and accelerated work.

I am really sorry... there is no way they could get away with this if she were on the other end of the spectrum. Or, they should not be.

I am really glad you're going to be able to look at a change for her this year or next year. I know you've recently gone through a lot with your own career and I hate to see you have to rearrange everything, but at the same time I know that your child is first and you will find a way to work it out!

I am waiting anxiously to see how it pans out, because somehow I'm seeing the possibility of the same decisions looming in our eventual future!
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  #9  
March 3rd, 2012, 07:24 PM
BensMom's Avatar Ephesians 4:29
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Quote:
Originally Posted by clouise View Post
I think that is an unfair assumption to say that most educators feel like kids who fall through the cracks are "not their problem." Most care very much. At times they are limited as to what actions they can take, but that doesn't mean they are uncaring.

I use my college degree and teacher certification all the time. Sorry to hear you didn't get much out of your degree.
I didn't say they don't care. Actually, they care very much (at least, the teachers I've known)! I said that the degree teaches you to cast your net as wide as you can. Whether or not a child passes to the next teacher is ultimately up to the administration. Pass or fail, it's unlikely a child will have the same teacher two years in a row unless they're in a small school or a Montessori school. It's always the job of the next teacher to help a child who fell through the previous teacher's cracks. Teachers aren't broken. The system is broken.
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  #10  
March 11th, 2012, 08:58 PM
Kathode's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Quebec, Canada
Posts: 2,615
OH my,

I know I haven't been here lately, but I do check in once in a while. Shari, I am so THERE with you. I have the double barrel, so to speak, because I can see things from both sides, as a mom of a TAG kid and as a teacher. I am so, so sad for Erin. I'm sad for Mia, who's in the same boat. There is no place for them in our current educational system. And I'm in Canada, so it's not just where you are.

The reality is, as a teacher, I do NOT have the support I need to be able to cater to the individualities of each child. One of my students has Aspergers. He's totally awesome. He can fix my laptop. I had my DH make copies of his Autocad for him cause I knew he'd like it. But all that is done on my own time. I have no time to spend creating 12 different lesson plans to cater to each individual kid.

At the same time, I totally expect that from Mia's teachers! I expect that they will create a distinct lesson plan for her because she is beyond what her classmates are doing. Yet I know this is too much to ask of one individual teacher.

I'm with Chrystal. We really have two choices: accept that our kids will get a sub-standard education in the public system or keep them at home. Personally I can't afford to not work so I do my best with "after-schooling"
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