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I just want to give up. I don't mean end my life give up, I mean, throw my hands in the air and let the bills pile up, the house go to heck, and pull Sam from school so I don't have to go out of the house twice a day.
Oh and while I'm at it, beg my OB to keep me in the hospital for a week after my c/s so I can rest.
I am tired of being surrounded by irresponsibility. I'm tired of being the only one (in my world) that is held accountable for my actions, that cares abotu whether bills get paid or not, that wants something better than a stress-filled marriage that with all the fighting/screaming/yelling now has our 3yo screaming and yelling when he's frustated, along with hitting because well, he's delayed and that's the only way he knows how to communicate.
(NO my husband would never hit me or our kids, he knows better)
but I feel like the emotional toll all this is taking on me is way worse than a bruise. Bruises heal, purposeful emotional stress breeds resentment.
I just want him to get a freaking job SOMEWHERE and keep it.
In 6 years of being together, he's been unemployed half of it.
I'm currently unemployed because my contract at my last job ended January 31 and I can't get a new job til after this baby is born in 10 days. I mean, I'm still looking, I just put an April 13 availability. God forbid someone interview me int he next 10 days, right?
There's another issue revolving around my sister..............but it's too painful to discuss. Again, someone else's irresponsibility is affecting me emotionally.
(((HUGS))) I am sorry your feeling so stressed and overwhelmed!!!! What is the reason he doesn't get a job or able to hold down a job?? Is he depressed?? I hope things start getting better for you ASAP!!!
until we met, he'd never been made to hold a job, his parents catered to him. Even at the 25-30 range. (we were 30 when we met and he spent a lot of our dating time lying, things I didn't find out til after we were married.)
As for not keeping a job, that boils down to not knowing how to go to work, keeps his head down and mouth shut and do what he's told. He's actually quite bright when it comes to the food industry, but he goes in all gung ho trying to change shtuff and he just doesn't get that he has to prove himself each and every time he gets a job.
Depressed? Yes, but won't stay on his meds long enough for them to help.