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He needs to do something


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  #1  
January 11th, 2011, 11:30 PM
challowell's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Caldwell, Ohio
Posts: 2,172
I am not a good fighter and I hold in my feelings a lot but I need to let off some steam. Me and my hubby have been married for almost 4 years. When Rachel was born he told everyone how good of a father he was going to be and always going to put them first. Here lately the person being put first is him. He sits up all night playing video games and come morning I have to dress, feed, and care for the girls because he "can't move". He will stay in bed untill he has to go to work at 1 in the afternoon. He barely pays attention to the girls and on the days he is home he sits on his butt and watches me cook, clean, and make the meals and never offers to help.

And today to top it off he waited untill I took him to work to think that he would need me to go home,find food for him to eat, and bring it back to him. My first thought is we are in a snowstorm and you wand me to do this with the kids in the car.I was mad.

Sorry this is long but I wish he would do more thinking ahead and help me out some.
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  #2  
January 12th, 2011, 07:12 AM
in_mommy's Avatar I am just me
Join Date: Mar 2004
Posts: 14,873
I dont blame you one bit for being mad!! I hope you didn't do it!! That was pretty rude and thoughtless of him, he should do without or figure something out on his own that will get his attention that he needs to start doing a little something around the house! Good Luck! I am starting to feel the same way!
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  #3  
January 16th, 2011, 04:50 PM
Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 11
Quote:
Originally Posted by in_mommy View Post
I dont blame you one bit for being mad!! I hope you didn't do it!! That was pretty rude and thoughtless of him, he should do without or figure something out on his own that will get his attention that he needs to start doing a little something around the house! Good Luck! I am starting to feel the same way!
I agree with her.. I'm sorry momma
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  #4  
March 25th, 2011, 08:31 PM
Preemie Momma
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Keokuk, IA
Posts: 148
I'm in the exact same position. I heard the same things from my husband and even though he doesn't have a legitimate job and is only doing whatever work he can find, I'm supposed to get up EVERY night with the babies while he plays Call of Duty Black Ops, etc. When she starts to get upset, I always have to get her, because she doesn't recognize him enough to feel comforted!

And to top it off, even though he spends NO time with her, he bosses me around telling me that I can't sleep during the day (even though our daughter does NOT sleep well at night) and that i'm constantly doing stuff wrong. She has reflux... She's fussy. Even with her meds...

I'm at a point where I'm clueless too. Part of me just wants to tell him to get a grip... but then again, what would be the point. He doesn't listen to anyone but himself...
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  #5  
March 29th, 2011, 10:46 AM
Lonomia's Avatar Super Hot Mommy
Join Date: Oct 2008
Location: Vancouver, BC
Posts: 2,256
You need to sit down with him and have a serious conversation about how you are feeling. Don't attack him and be straightforward. Men need to hear exactly what the problem is.
Marriage is an equal partnership that doesn't have any designated duties. Your kids and the household are both of your responsibilities and he needs to know it. His selfishness is going to result in more and more unhappiness which will ultimately end up destroying your family.
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