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OK -- so like I know this girl whom had twins about 6 weeks ago with her BF of like 10 months. The BF is a truck driver (which btw the daddy has YET to buy them diapers, bottles, formula, clothes -- the grandmother has been supporting these babies) and is on the road all the time and the mother of the babies is a SAHM (mentally disabled) who just moved back into her mother's house. Here's my problem -- the mother of the twins is an absolute moron! I'm talking that she's so stupid that she has no business having babies. Do I sound bitter? Probably but my real problem lies with the fact that the mother of the babies relies on her own mother to take care of them for her. The grandmother of the twins vents to me about how "so-in-son" complains about being tired all the time, when she (the grandmother) works full-time and is getting up every 3 hours to help feed the twins and still goes to work everyday. Her house is trashed, she has no energy, and she feels like she's slowly going insane. Well, I've personally babysat the twins myself and I had absolutely NO problems being able to balance watching them, spending time with them, cuddling them, playing with them, feeding & changing their diapers ALL by myself all while finishing up my cleaning!! How is it that I can accomplish all of this but she can't?? I just don't understand it. It absolutely drives me nuts that this girl has this HUGE blessing that she's totally ungrateful for. She doesn't hold them, or play with them. After she feeds the babies, she puts them right back into their bouncy seats. They're craving that contact and she needs to bond with them, otherwise she's never going to learn anything about being a mother or how to mother her children. It's so sad... she gets angry b/c when they're fussy I can walk over pick them up, hold them and pat their little bottom and they stop fussing and go right to sleep!! She's like "how do you do that"?? GRRRR.. it's called "CONTACT.. they need it.. they want it.. and if you spend just a little bit of time with them each they'll do this for you too"!!
whew.. ok I feel better!
GOD, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference ~ Amen.
she sounds like my sister in law. when her twins were born she did not have them for an entire week for the first year. it was just too much for her to handle. blah blah blah. even now she doesnt have them all the time. she always needs a weekend break. if her and her husband are going out on a date she needs the whole weekend with them gone. right now the family is happy to take them becuase their homelife is horriffic. i totally understand your frustration.
I am so sorry you have to see this.
Something similar happened with my family and it caused a ot of hard feelings.
Hopefully the mother can get the skills she needs. I know a lot of community centers offer parenting classes. She might not like the idea but it would be in the best interest of the children.
Best of luck!
Thank you KimberlyD0 for my absolutely beautiful siggy!
Is there anything that could put these children in danger? Are they basically being negelected when in her care? If so, report her! Then she can be forced to take parenting classes, and get other help that she may need.