My friend has a 3 year old child with severe special needs. Last year she was evaluated and Doctors and specialist told her that her daughter needed 3 different types of therapy, one of those being speech. She then declined the services saying that she didn't have time for them. So today I was youtubing: signs of autism and I noticed that Aizen and Avery do these behaviors 'sometimes'. For example: Avery will tippy-toe around the house or flail her arms around 'sometimes'. Aizen will throw huge tantrums and repeat the same phrase over and over, like "I want my toy, I want my toy, I want my toy" over and over and over. Sometimes I call him and he will deliberately ignore me and zone out, but then 10 minutes later he will come up to me and say "what mama?" so I know he WAS listening to me. He will freak out if he smells a weird odor or if he hears the most minute sound like the buzzing of the heater and cover his ears, but overall they've met all of their milestones. Since the spectrum is so broad how would you know if your child has autism? Some of the children that are classified as such seem so normal to me and speak well and have eye contact (I work in a clinic) so how can you even tell?

[Mod-quietsong]

Honestly, this young, sometimes it's hard to tell. The biggest sign, I've been told, is that if your child is on the spectrum, it isn't a "sometimes" behavior... it's a "frequently" or "almost always." Honestly, the two things you've called out are also very age appropriate - toe walking is typical until closer to 2-3, and tantrums are VERY common at 3-4. A better indicator, at these young ages, are more developmental signs... Not talking, not pointing, losing skills they once had, self-injury behaviors, etc. Completely ignoring other people/peers is a strong one as well. Sensory issues (like the weirdo odor or the buzzing) can sometimes be a sign, but they're a very unreliable one, since many people (kids and adults) all have their own sensory issues without anything else being 'wrong!'

[GymChick]

Every child is different. Cade NEVER walked on his tippy toes. He never threw tantrums until just recently. He never "lost" skills... they just never developed. I think what you're describing about your kids sounds like a typical child for their age.