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So, what would you do in my situation?


Forum: VBAC: Vaginal Birth After a Caesarean

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  #1  
June 17th, 2010, 06:48 PM
mothra's Avatar Martha
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Massachusetts
Posts: 4,906
Hey everyone... I'm currently about 6 months pregnant with #2 and am trying to make up my mind about this baby's birth. I feel like I know in my heart what I want to do (VBAC) but maybe just need some encouragement? Or to feel like I'm not being crazy or something. I'd just like to spell out my whole situation and get some feedback on what others think. So here goes. Sorry this will probably be long.

With my first son Isaac, he was a frank breech at 37 weeks. I had an external version done which went fine, but in the end it didn't really matter because he was still posterior. After 42 hours of exhausting labor (4 of which was spent pushing) the decision was made by my midwife to do the c-section. Actually I remember sort of demanding it at that point - lol. I managed to dilate 10cm with the help of pitocin but he was just stuck in the wrong position and I was beyond exhausted. It was necessary but not an emergency or anything. My recovery was rough - mostly because I went into the surgery so worn out and anemic. I ended up almost needing a blood transfusion, but avoided that. Terrible terrible pain, infected incision, round of antibiotics. Took months to feel normal again. Had some PPD. All that good stuff.

Upon finding out about this pregnancy, I started seeing the same midwife again. Unfortunately, recently her hospital banned VBACs. They're trying to fight it but it's not likely to change before this birth. She says I'm a really good candidate for a VBAC - my pelvis is fine, I did dilate before, and it's unlikely to take as long the second time. But if I wanted to do the VBAC she'd have to transfer me to this other hospital - one that's WAY farther away, that I've never been to before and know nothing about. Apparently they have a great midwifery program there and a good reputation for VBACs/natural births, so it sounds great.

I guess my problem with switching is that I'm completely comfortable at my current hospital, with my current midwife. If I'm going to end up with another c-section, I want to have it there. At some point I ended up seeing nearly every OB/midwife associated with this hospital and I trust them all, like them all, love the hospital itself and all the nurses were incredible. I'm comfortable there. It's closer. It's where my son was born. I'm kind of attached to the place and people.

Also on the c-section pros list are a few other things: My DH just got this new job that he starts in July. This job requires him to be gone for 3 weeks at a time, then back home for 3 weeks, then gone again, etc. It would be REALLY convenient to just KNOW when the baby is coming so that I can prepare for him to be there or not. A while ago I mentioned to my midwife that I was kind of leaning towards a ERC so she told me when it'll probably be scheduled. I'm a "planner" type, I feel like if I'm going to have another c-section I want to KNOW about it and be prepared for it...I believe the recovery won't be half as bad as before if I know that it's coming. I know this is probably stuff you all considered at some point.

I did initially consider home birth as well, I spoke to a home birth midwife early on but we ruled it out. I have this heart condition that really isn't a big deal...I had surgery to fix the defect years ago so it's really not even an issue but still something I'm paranoid about. I do feel better about being in a hospital.

I know in my heart that every birth is different and the likely hood of the same situation happening again is so slim. I know I'm still built to have babies and unless in the final weeks there's some good reason to not try it, that I really ought to give it a chance. I guess I'm just scared. Scared of "failing" again, scared of the whole experience of labor, scared of going outside of my comfort zone to a new hospital with new people so far away. I know I need to think about my own health and safety though and I'm NOT comfortable with choosing major surgery for myself if it's not necessary.

Siiigh. I probably just answered my own questions. But I need a little encouragement! I see my midwife again next week so I want to talk with her a bit more about things. Anyways thanks for reading if you got this far...
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  #2  
June 17th, 2010, 07:07 PM
Seanaci's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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If it were me, and I was truly set on at least TRYING for a VBAC, I'd go take a tour of the other hospital...and talk to the midwives there, etc. I think for me it would be more about wanting to experince the other way of bringing a baby into the world, know what I mean?

With my son, I was progressing slowly and the baby was in distress...so after only 17 hours of labor, we decided a c-section was best. No real complications (aside from my son having to be "bagged" after he was born because he wasn't breathing)...had some normal healing pain and PPD. So when we start trying for #2 I am going to talk to my doctor about a VBAC...if it means delivering at a different hospital, I'll do it.

Just know, that no matter what you decide, you are still a great mommy and will have two amazing kids in your life!

Good luck!
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  #3  
June 17th, 2010, 08:32 PM
Mama To 3 Amazing Boys
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: Just the other side of sane!
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Your fears and concerns are completely valid!

But, if you feel in your heart that a VBAC is best for you and your baby, I would tour the hospital, get to know the staff as best you can. You know you're a good candidate for this, so why not go for it! I say, if you have to opportunity to go for it, then go for it. You may be surprise at how comfortable this new hospital is and how much love it's staff as well! I had both my boys via c-section at the same hospital....the hospital was wonderful and the staff was marvalous...but I HATED my OB...I tell people she was the devil!

I'm almost 20 weeks, and I'm trying for a VBA2C....now, I haven't been to doctor yet, because of medicaid and fighting with them! I go to the doctor in 1 week and 5 days () but I still don't know if I'm a good candidate for VBA2C...but if this doctor doesn't give me the answer I'm looking for, I'll go somewhere else! So, I say go for it, you might surprise yourself!

You still have LOTS of time to make your decision.....either way, you're still an amazing woman and an amazing Mama which ever way you go! Go with your gut...it's hardly wrong!
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  #4  
June 18th, 2010, 05:35 AM
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Hello and welcome! Congratulations on your pregnancy!

I've been in your shoes before. I know what you're talking about. When #2 came along, I ended up going for the ERCS for the convenience/timing/planning/scared factor. I wanted to VBAC, planned for it, but when the doctor suggested the ERCS at my 38 week appointment I said, "Okay". Boy do I ever regret that decision! This isn't to say that you are going to, but it was a bad decision on my part. I didn't realize how much I missed out on, and the long term consequences that came from having more than one cesarean. With my third pregnancy, I was determined to have a VBA2C. I had to fight a bit for it. In the end, I found a midwife/OB pair that was encouraging. I had to travel over 2 hours to get to their office/hospital. Was it worth it? You better believe it was!

I understand about wanting to stay with what is comfortable and familiar. But, you'd still get the same midwife, right? She'd just send you to the other hospital? Or would it be a new provider, too? How far away is far?

I get the "failure" concept. Totally! But, you've already gone through labor before. You never failed the first time. Your baby was in a position that just didn't work. That had nothing to do with your body doing what it needed to do to birth a baby. Really, the only way you could fail would be if you didn't try. ERCS is a valid option, I'm not discounting it. But, there is no reason for it in your case. There are no situations or conditions that make it necessary for you.

So, I'd suggest you stick around here. Get to know us and learn all you can. Visit Spinning Babies and get to know what you can do to keep baby in a great position. Go take a tour of the other hospital. Talk to the nurses, meet with the midwives (if you have to switch), and feel it out.

Good luck!!! You can do this!
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  #5  
June 18th, 2010, 08:14 AM
lhug_nar's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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I just wanted to chime in and say "ditto to the others". If you feel in your gut that you want to at least attempt a VBAC then go tour the other hospital and interview them. You can contact your local ICAN group and they should tell you which docs are more VBAC friendly too.

Good luck, stick around though!
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  #6  
June 21st, 2010, 12:46 PM
SugarNSpice's Avatar VBAC Mommy!!!
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I had my first by c-section for the same reason you did......Induced and a posterior baby, dilated just fine but she wouldn't budge b/c she was posterior, etc.

I was determined to VBAC with my 2nd and chose to see a midwife and give birth at a hospital an hour from my home so that I could be able to do so.

My VBAC went perfectly. It was my dream birth, couldn't have gone better! I never once thought twice about the decision to VBAC and I am so glad I made the decision to VBAC...it was the most empowering experience of my life and I look back on that day with such joy and pride. I can only hope that my birth experience this time around goes as smoothly.

My advice to you....go for the VBAC. You will be so glad you did. You have to get your frame of mind in the right place. Do not think "If I am going to end up with another c-section......".......you should think "I will NOT end up with another c-section". The power of the mind is amazing. You have to believe in yourself and your body. It sounds like you're an excellent VBAC candidate and I'm sure you'll do fine. Don't doubt yourself. Go for the VBAC.

There is nothing I would not do to be able to VBAC. Trust me, you will be so glad you did.
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  #7  
June 21st, 2010, 03:17 PM
dream2bemommy22's Avatar and baby makes 5
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Well, i can relate to some extent.
I had an awesome OB with DD #1, she was so kind, encouraging, really made you feel super special every visit. I loved it. So naturally wheni got pregnant again, i requested her, even though there are 4 doctors in my practice, and technically i am supposed to see all of them throughout the pregnancy. I never did with DD, so i wasnt going to with this one either.
unfortunately at about 26 or 28 weeks pregnant, my OB was out of town, so i saw an ob i had never met before.
He was AMAZING. So knowledgeable, made me feel so comfortable about vbacs, really took the time to answer my questions, which then made me look back at my regular ob, who i noticed tended to brush off my fears of vbacs, ect.
So i made a decision to not go back to my regular ob, and i was SO happy i made that decision. I wouldnt have wanted another OB in that delivery room with me. he was so encouraging during the whole thing, and it made me feel so at ease and calm during my sons birth.

So i guess what im saying is. You have to be comfortable with you doctors, but you never know how you will feel about the new ones unless you give them a chance.
Staying with your current midwive, ensures that you will not have the vbac that it sounds like you want.

Trust me, we are all afraid at failing with the vbac, and we are all nervous of what can happen the day of. I cried for hours the night before my induction, because i had no idea what was going to happen the next day, and i was so afraid for myself and my baby boy.

26 weeks is still plenty of time to find a new midwife, and build a nice strong relationship with them.

good luck with your decision.
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  #8  
June 22nd, 2010, 09:43 AM
~*Kixs*~'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Go visit the other hospital and set up an appointment with the other midwives just to see how you feel about them. Since you are only about 6m (same as me ) you still have plenty of time to make a choice.

If you love your midwife now and she is suggesting this other group to you it must be with the best intentions. KWIM

My DD was a planned c/s b/c she was franks breech and I did not want a version done. But my DS was a VBAC and let you tell you recovery was a million times better with him and I thought the recovery with my DD was pretty good!

While there are pro's and con's to a ERCS and a VBAC you should explore your options fully so you know what choice is going to be best for you and baby.

Good luck!
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