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So today after DH's trucking appointment and calling companies I have been pretty excited, alot of stress will be leaving us with his job paying much better. But on the way home in the car just now I completely 180-ed. Something got me to thinking about TTC (probably that I can feel AF coming on any moment now). I counted all the months in my head and as soon as AF comes that is 44 months we've been trying. I always say the first 3-4 months are so were just "not preventing" but we were bding at least every other day so I consider it the same. I dunno wether it's the number, or hormones, or what but I thought about that number and I just felt so hopeless! I am feeling like this will just never ever happen for us. Last month was the hardest so far, I had finally started thinking really positive and I was two weeks late. It seems like this month will be even harder and the next after that etc. We try saying we are going to take a break, but no matter how I try I am constantly thinking "what if this is the month" "if we bd now will it happen?", I can't seem to get away from thinking about it. *sigh* sorry if this is a downer girls, I just needed to get it out.
I've had a few tests but no RE yet, our insurance requires referrals from my general doctor, and although the Gyno I see says I should go, my regular doctor won't let me. On the upside (although it's not making me feel better atm lol) when DH does get into this job we will both have insurance in 3 months.
Tabitha & Ryan; Married on Saturday, April 17, 2004 -TTC #1 for 7.5 years. Missing our Angels...
Dx with PCOS at age 14.
Miscarriage in June 2006
2 cycles of Clomid 50mg
1 cycle of Clomid 100mg resulting in miscarriage
Dx with Adenomyosis on 1/28/10
Clomid 150mg 4/30(day 3) - 5/4(day 5) Ultrasound on May 10th.
5/10 - Ultrasound showed 2 perfect follies! (15mm&17mm) Ovulation predicted within 6 days! Progesterone check ordered for 5/20.
5/27 - New round of Clomid started, no ultrasound this cycle, 2 more cycles planned on our own. If no bfp, onto next step!
6/27 - Round 3 Clomid 150mg started.
7/25 - AF Showed, starting final round of Clomid 150mg on CD3
8/21- AF Showed, In the process of finding a new RE
*Waiting to see our new RE
Well my general doctor takes one look at my age (21 in august) and tells me the whole "relax" story. But that's nothing compared to the look I get when I say it's been 3 1/2 years. I completely understand the age concern, I thought I was crazy at the time too but I wanted it more than I thought I was crazy, and DH and I were in the position to be able to handle it. It drives me crazy that she takes one look at my age and it suddenly doesn't matter how concerned I am. My worker is no help in getting her changed either. I will just be stuck waiting for DH's insurance to kick in once he gets into trucking I guess.
Aaron what state are you in? I don't know much about everything as I get the runaround alot when I am looking for info. Maybe it is a MI thing? All I know is my Gyno handed me an RE's card and told me to see what my Gen could do about it.
I'm so sorry hun! If I were you, I would find a new doctor! I am on the younger side, so I know how it feels for the doctors to look at you, and tell you that you are too young, or you have plenty of time. Doctors shouldn't judge like that, but they do.