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WWYD? advice please! (long, x-posted)


Forum: Trying to Conceive 1 Year +

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  #1  
December 3rd, 2010, 07:45 AM
eccomi's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: italy
Posts: 3,604
not sure if you ladies remember, but my 21yo SIL is pregnant. i wasn't thrilled about it in the beginning (for a multitude of reasons, including the fact that she has no means to support herself or this baby) but with time i've gotten used to and accepted the idea. i always knew that the moment the baby arrived any animosity would be forgotten because babies have a way of doing that.

anyway, prior to this pregnancy i'd always had a good relationship with my SIL. in all these years she has never called me by name, but by an affectionate nickname. well, i noticed that after the first time i spoke with her about her pregnancy that she started to call me amy. i also noticed that she had taken me off as a sibling on FB. i asked her point blank if there was something wrong and she told me no and that she hadn't even noticed that she had started to call me amy (i didn't even mention the sibling thing). whatever. i wasn't convinced but what more could i say?

then my uncle passed away suddenly and i had to make an emergency trip home to the US. she sent me a message on facebook telling me she was sorry to hear of my family's loss, which was nice of her. then the first day i saw her after getting back from the US she bit my head off for absolutely no reason. it was totally uncalled for and was so rude that i told DH that until she either apologized to me OR explained to me what i've done to merit this treatment that i didn't want to have anything to do with her. this was all about a month ago.

since then there has been no word whatsoever from SIL and obviously i've kept my distance, too. i noticed about four or five days ago that she took her wall off of her facebook page. i just figured she did that because people in the village are starting to find out that she's pregnant and talk about it so i imagined that she didn't want people snooping around her FB page. anyway, last night we had a girls dinner at my friend's house and we were talking about my SIL and her pregnancy situation. one of my friends is also friends with my SIL on FB. well, she mentioned something about SIL posting something that day and i said WHAT?!?! turns out she hasn't taken off her wall... she has blocked just me from seeing it!!! are you kidding me??? how old are we??? there's a part of me that just wants to unfriend her and continue on as before (though that would mean that i'd be stooping to her level). the other side of me just wants for there to be harmony in the family (i hate drama!) but on principal i think i deserve an apology or an explanation (that i don't think i will ever get at this point).

WWYD? i know i shouldn't let it bother me but seriously it's really upsetting me.

BTW> my SIL was moody and overly sensitive BEFORE she was pregnant so i feel like this pregnancy is just magnifying it x10 and making a monster of her.

i'm sure she feels like i'm not taking part or being supportive of her, but how can i be after the way she has been acting/treating me???
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cycles 1-16: TTC naturally, all BFNs
cycle 17 & 18: not TTC (due to diagnostic tests)
october 14: RE appt with follow-up hysteroscopy + saline sonogram... TUBES ARE CLEAR!
cycle 19, 20 & 21: natural TTC cycles = BFNs
cycle 22: another natural cycle, but preparing for our first IUI with injectables for cycle 23! FINALLY!!!
FEBRUARY 10th... our very first when we least expected it!!!

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  #2  
December 3rd, 2010, 08:38 AM
MummyTo2Plus5's Avatar Loving my baby boy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Huddersfield, UK
Posts: 37,260
how old is she???

are you sure its not cos shes young???
i would ask her point blank what her problem is and if you have done anything wrong

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  #3  
December 3rd, 2010, 09:11 AM
Marieke's Avatar Mommy to an angel
Join Date: Jun 2006
Location: Canada
Posts: 4,420
Total b&?%$... You don't need that BS, I'd keep my distance and ignore her.
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  #4  
December 3rd, 2010, 12:39 PM
Mega Super Mommy
Join Date: May 2010
Location: Palm Coast, FL
Posts: 1,604
Send a message via AIM to Coley54
Funny you should bring this sort of thing up. My 'boss' who I've been friends with since before he was my boss (I'm using that term really loosely...he's more my trainer than my boss but he calls himself my boss) just deleted me off of FB so I'm going through something similar even though its not family. I know why he took me off his so I haven't bothered asking but seeing as you've already asked her and she says nothing is wrong, I would be friendly but wouldn't go out of my way to do so. Or you could ask her again. Its a tough spot to be in. I wish I could help!!!
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