[MamaTo2Ls]

Hey ladies! I'm trying to figure out what signs to look for when it comes to secondary infertility. Can anyone here help me? Thanks!

[MountainMomma]

My doctor said that any time you have been having regular unprotected sex for 6 months - a year and are not pregnant they consider that infertility. IF you have a child previously and then are having trouble conceiving again, that is secondary infertility.

Secondary infertility affects so many people, (as many as 60% of couples with fertility problems are SECONDARY infertility) and many just don't feel comfortable talking about it. Just because you are temporarily experiencing infertility does not mean that you need fertility treatments or that you won't conceive. My DS was conceived after 2 years of NTNP, and though I didn't realize it at the time, by definition I was dealing with Secondary Infertility even then.

This site seems to have some great info on it. LINK Hope that helps. If you have more questions, please don't hesitate to ask!

[MamaTo2Ls]

Thanks. I know it hasn't been 6 months to a year yet that we've been NTNP. I've actually only had 3 PP AFs. The reason I started looking at this was b/c my 2nd AF was a bit shorter and lighter than usual.

If you suffer from secondary infertility, do you still get AF? Is it irregular? Is is short and light? Painful or not?

Sorry for all these questions. My DH thinks I'm being paranoid, and maybe I am. We are on a limited time of conceiving this time. I need to be pregnant by Dec., Jan. at the latest to have our third now. If we don't get preggers by then I have no clue when and if we would start TTC again.

[MamaAnna]

Whether or not AF visits and things of that nature depend on the cause of the infertility. It could be a sudden change in hormones, in DH's swimmers, or any number of other causes. My doctor told us that we were dealing with secondary infertility after just 4 cycles of TTC and now we are about to start cycle 9. Talking to your doctor can really give you a lot of information.

If you don't mind my asking, why do you have a time limit on your TTC efforts?

[MamaTo2Ls]

DH is in the Air Force and is getting out next November. So my due date needs to be by the middle-end of October 2009. We will never have as great of insurance as Tricare, and once he's out we won't have much if any for a bit. As long as we have the baby while he's still in, we only pay $75.

We want our kids close in age too. I also have a hard time finding a dr that I like and trust. I have one down here that is absolutely awesome, and I wouldn't change for anything. So DH and I also would like to see him through my pregnancy!

Once he's out of the Air Force, we're moving to WI. We live in MS right now.

When is it time to call my dr? I would rather find out for sure if I'm Oing or not before making an appt. KWIM. Right now I'm not sure either way.

If you don't mind me asking, how did you find out so soon that you were dealing with secondary infertility?

[MountainMomma]

One way to find out if you are ovulating is to chart your basal body temperature. You need to take your temp every day at the same time. It needs to be immediately after waking, and after a solid block of sleep (at least 3 hours). With a new baby that might be a little difficult to do though. You can use OPK's to get an idea of wether or not you O, but they don't work for every woman.

You might want to try and talk to your doctor about your concerns. Some doctors are better than others about following a womans intuition and will start testing earlier. A simple blood test around CD 21 can identify wether you are ovulating or not. Do your periods come at regular intervals? (like every 28 days or every 30 days)? If so, it's more likely that you are Oing, but speaking as someone whose body does not conform to the norms, I have learned to NEVER rule anything out.

GOOD LUCK, and I hope you stick around even though it hasn't been long. The 6 - 12 months are how long most doctors make you wait before doing any testing or anything. We don't have time limits here. You're more than welcome to stick around so we can all get to know you better.

[MamaTo2Ls]

Thanks.

I got my first pp AF about 11 weeks after DD was born. I had no concerns about anything then. 32 days later my next AF came., but it was shorter and lighter. Not like spotting lighter, just no heavy days. Well, 32 days later sure enough AF started again. I was quite surprised it came on time being I just gave birth. I'm now on CD 14, and today I did take my temp. I'm going to keep trying to take it each morning hoping I see an ovulation pattern. I do get like a twinge on one side during the middle of the cycle, but never knew if that was an O pain. I haven't gotten it yet though. IDK. I guess I'll have to wait and see. I don't like that game. LOL.

[MamaAnna]

Go to www.fertilityfriend.com and sign up to use their charting software. All you have to do is input your temp each day and any other information you choose to gather if any. Once the software detects ovulation it will give you cross-hairs to confirm. They appear 3 days after ovulation has occurred. It makes it a lot easier and you can use it for free if you don't mind having limited access to features. It can be picky and refuse membership for odd reasons. Nobody really knows why. If it does that just PM me your e-mail address and I'll send you an invitation.

My doctor decided that we're dealing with secondary infertility so quickly because both of my children were conceived while TTA. DH and I were using the pull out method for quite some time before not trying, but not avoiding for a couple of months. Then we went into official TTC with some tips from my OB. Because of policies we still have to wait the required one year unless something happens that would call for earlier testing. That is unlikely though.

Since I started charting and using OPKs I have learned that my O date can vary greatly. Just in the time I've been charting I have O'd anywhere from CD 13 to CD 23 and now it seems that my LP may range from 13 to 16 days when it should have a pretty solid average with a one day variance. I knew my hormones were out of whack, but seeing it on "paper" really makes it stand out. At least now I know better when to expect AF!

[MountainMomma]

I am one who consistently has a 30 day cycle. While everyone says that your LP should be the same every month, mine never is. Some cycles I have 13 day LP, and some as little as 8 day LP, which could be alot of the reason I'm having so many problems. I actually am just starting to get medical assistance. For 2 1/2 years we just assumed it would happen when it's supposed to happen but after 2 1/2 years and 4 early losses, we decided to get some testing done and see what we can find out. My normal doctor suspects PCOS or at the very least an LPD, but I can't get into the specialist until next month, so I am playing the waiting game too. I don't like it either!

[MamaAnna]

They need to come up with a fix-it-all pill and give two to every couple. Then nobody would have to deal with this horrible waiting game! Of course they'd probably charge something like $5,000 per pill to make up for loss in income for fertility treatments.

[MamaTo2Ls]

A fix-it-all pill would be nice. The waiting game sucks. I just hope I'm jumping too far ahead, and I am Oing. I guess we'll see soon.

I hope all of us will get our BFP SOON!!!

[MamaAnna]

Big to that. If you talk to your doctor I really recommend trying to have 3 complete charts first so you have some sort of pattern charted. I had both of mine with horrible, horrible insurance that covered pretty much nothing so I can understand wanting a good policy, and I'm sure we can all understand wanting a good doctor. We made monthly payments on the bills though so while it cost in the long run it was no big deal and I'm sure you can find another doctor. While I hope you get your BFP soon I hope you don't give up just because of the insurance nonsense that seems to be going on these days. A baby is worth every bit of effort and every penny spent, as I'm sure you know!

[MamaTo2Ls]

Oh definitely. I would obviously love to have another child, and I can't wait! If I don't get pregnant by January, it'll be put on hold. I just don't know how long. I can't wait to do it all again! I can't wait to have my 3 babies at home. So I'm keeping my fingers crossed each month. I don't know if this makes sense, but it just feels like this third baby is supposed to be here, you know.

Anyways, I've just heard that if you're dealing with secondary infertility you need to get it dealt with ASAP to avoid other infertility issues. WI is a lot more expensive than down here on the coast, and if we can save $18,000 doing it while he's entirely in the AF, and we can see the same dr that I've seen for both my children (he also delivered both my children), those are HUGE pluses for us, you know?!

I'll never give up on having babies. LOL. I don't know where I heard it, but someone once said....."having babies is like a bag of potato chips. You just can't stop after one."

[Delekatala]

I am gonna chime in here. We tried to get pregnant for 3 years, it was very discouraging. I didn't think anything was wrong because my cycle was like clockwork 28 days every month. I started bbt charting when we hit 3 years and found out i wasn't ovulating. Got put on clomid and here I am pregnant (with twins)

So in short, I am a huge fan of BBT charting now, you can get a bbt thermometer at walgreens for 10 bucks. and you can't use period regularity as a sign things are ok.

I wish you luck in your ttc journey, and hope you get preggo by the cutoff!

[MamaAnna]

That's what I get for not checking on you in awhile! Twins?! Geez girl, when you get them to stick they really stick!