[~InHisHands~]

I am curious about your story. Do you mind sharing it? I've just been noticing that we have had very similar feelings this cycle... very hopeful at the beginning & going downhill & doubtful toward the end. Plus we seem to be pretty close together in our cycle... we're both 13 dpo.

My story, if you're interested...
This was my first cycle of really trying since my m/c. When I did get pg before, I got pg quickly & easily on 100 mg Clomid so of course I figured once I could get my Clomid back I'd probably conceive again this time. Well, doubt that now since my progesterone didn't do so well this cycle. They want it above a 12 & the cycle I conceived it was a 17 but this cycle it was 8.4 so now I'm pretty doubtful. Anyway, we're upping my Clomid to 150 mg & trying again next cycle! *sigh*

[jencaz]

I'm sorry, I just saw this post. Thanks for asking. I would love to tell someone my story.
Dh and I had been ntnp for 9 months when I got a bfp in June. I m/c a few days after I got the bfp and have been ttc intently since then. I went into the doctor on cd 23 this month. He did a progesterone test and it came back to being in normal range for ovulating. Since it was normal I didn't bother to ask what the number was. Well.. I had a really good feeling this month and just knew this month was going to be it. I guess my feeling was wrong cause AF came today. I go back into the doctor on Thursday for a whole bunch of other tests. The nurse said something today about him possibly putting me on clomid, but I don't know if he is going to or not. DH said today he doesn't want multiples. I told him the chance goes up on clomid, expecially since I'm already ovulating on my own.

Anyway... It's not too exciting, but it's my story.
I would be interested to hear other stories, and I promise I will be better at looking for posts.

[~InHisHands~]

You can actually read a few stories here... http://www.justmommies.com/forums/f5...r-stories.html

You should also add your story!

[Mommy2Dakota]

Amazing (and sad) how many of us here have miscarried! Its funny how NTNP goes along quite smoothly until that loss and then things intensify! I know it did for me.

I breastfed my daughter upto June this year (so nearly aged 3) but was NTNP from when my AF returned when she was 9mths (april 2007). I got a loverly surprise BFP 2 weeks before Xmas (2007 still) but miscarried straight away with the eggie coming out Xmas day . It took 8weeks to get my AF back and I was so eager to get pregs again I had researched into charting etc and was totally obsessed and eager to pinpoint that eggie. It was a few months later that I learn't about 'luteal phases' and that mine was short. My cycle was (still is) screwy in terms of length changing and ovulation moving. I didn't know if it was because I was breastfeeding though so kept hoping and waiting and researching. It is said that some, few, women find they can't get pregs whilst nursing but in the meantime I was on forums watching nursing mums get their BFP's no prob. After my daughter turned aged 2 we cut day nursings out (tried nights but she wouldn't have it) and I thought that might help but nope!
I tried to fix my problem myself with herbal remedies and B6 but I got two longer cycles but then went back to normal.
I was surprised when my daughter agreed to stop nursing in June this year and although sad that I did have to encourage her (I wanted to let her self-wean) I was excited about my ttc chances increasing! But jun,jul, and aug cycles were exactly the same - short LP! I went to the docs august cycle for blood tests and my CD3 was fine (including the breastfeeding hormone, returned to normal) but my 7dpo test showed low progesterone which I knew and suspected was the case. I went to the docs Sep hoping for progesterone and maybe Clomid. She told me to go away for another 6mths!!!!! She said because they wanted a longer gap since I stopped nursing to see if my body will 'fix' itself. I don't believe nursing was the cause (after seeing others get pregs and speaking to breastfeeding experts) so was devastated but I did manage to persuade her to give me progesterone. She thinks I don't ovulate at all but I don't understand how that can be considering I concieved once whilst nursing back in 2007, not to mention my chart pattern and +OPK's. I am praying so hard to prove her wrong and go back with a BFP. Otherwise the next step is Clomid.

Sorry! My posts always end up long!

[MountainMomma]

Just a little info for those of you considering Clomid but nervous about multiples. My RE said that it only increases the chances of multiples by 4% if you are only taking Clomid by itself.

[BornAgainRenee]

I completely agree with you Jo. Its amazing how when your ntnp that getting pg is great and not getting pg is great too, until you loose one, then the want and need to get pg and stay pg is overwhelming.

My story is above but I will share it here again. It starts in April of 2006. DH and I had been ntnp since sometime in 2004. A few times I was late but never pg. We had just moved out of my families home, we were there to catch up our finances and the last thing I wanted was to get pg while we were there. I was worried the whole time but it never happened. Then the first month we were in our own home I got pg. I wasn't exactly excited, I wasn't sure that I was wanting another one at that time. But dh was happy and he told me that I needed to just embrace it. So I did. Then the sunday after I found out I had a horrible cramp, it went away and I thought nothing of it, then the next day I started bleeding. I called the dr. several times and they finally had me come in for an ultrasound. Well there was my bean with a heartbeat and right on schedule, so I went home with threatened miscarriage as my diagnosis. Well the bleeding continued. IT wasn't light bleeding either, I was loosing giant clots, some so large that the got stuck and then kinda shot out. I had 2 more ultrasounds where the baby had a heartbeat, was growing and right on target. Then I had an appt. on May 31st. I went to have another ultrasound and the baby had no heartbeat. I had been bleeding the whole time. So they sent me home assuming that I would miscarry soon. Well that didn't happen until June 6th. So after that I was desperate to get pg again. We tried and tried, and it became something that was no longer fun. But I finally got pg in Nov. Things were going well, baby had a heartbeat, I got past the last miscarriage date and all was well. Then I went in for an 11 wk appt. and the baby had no heartbeat. I had no symptoms, they called it a missed miscarriage. I went in for a d&c and my periods returned to pretty much normal right away. We took a month off then started trying again. This time it took me about 8 months, I got pg in Oct. we passed all the days, everything was going great. I started feeling the baby move and I was so excited. Then on Fri. Jan. 19th I started to feel not quite right, with moisture that I didn't believe should be there. So the next morning I called the Dr. and he told me to go to L&D. I did she did tests and found no amniotic fluid, she was going to do an ultrasound but changed her mind because she had 2 emergency c sections to perform. So she sent me home. Sunday things were going ok, then sunday night I just knew that something was wrong. Mon. morning I called my Dr. and told him all that happened, he had me come in, they did an ultrasound, the baby looked great, she was getting big, then there it was, little dots all over. The US tech got my Dr. and he came in and said that the baby looked great but that we had a problem, the umbilical cord had some out of my uterus and we in my vaginal area, that my cervix had dialated and that I needed to make a choice, I could induce labor, or I could try with a 20% chance of success to have them put me in the hospital and see if we could get the cord to go back up and then do an emergency cerclage. Well there was no way I was going to choose to kill my child, so I was admitted. They got me in with a cathader in and put me in the position where they put your head lower then your feet and try for gravity to take over. Well at about 3:45 my water broke and there was no stopping it. I had Gracie at 4:00 pm. I was 20 weeks, just 4 weeks away from where she could have been saved. I held her and she grasped my finger. I kissed her and she moved her mouth. Then all of a sudden IM being moved and my Dr. yelled that I was hemoraging and I needed to go in for emergency surgery. The nurse took her from me and gave her to my dh, I was rushed to the OR, and given a pen to sign a form and then a mask was shoved in my face. Next thing I knew I was back in my room, my dh was there with the baby. She had died in his hands 10 min. after I had her. At that point we didn't talk about whether or not we were going to have more, we just went back to ntnp. The mourning period was long. In Feb. of last year I decided that I wanted to loose weight, so I started a program and had been doing really well. We moved in June, and by July I had lost about 80lbs. At the end of July I found out I was pg again. I quit my diet and started doing all that I thought I should. This one didn't last that long, I was almost 8 weeks when I miscarried. DH and I had a long talk and we agreed that we would try until I had a successful pregnancy. I have since been to the Dr. and had test ran. I have no issues as to why I keep having losses. My dr. was quick to assure me that loosing Gracie was seperate from the miscarriages, that Gracie was due to an incompetent cervix that he would watch very closely in the future, and that the miscarriages may be related but also may not be. He told me that there was no reason for me not to be able to have a healthy baby, and that my weight loss will dramatically change that. To date I have lost 103lbs. I have no idea how long it will take to get pg, and how many more miscarriages I have to have before one sticks, but I am going to keep my chin up, and keep on keepin on.

[Mommy2Dakota]

Just a little info for those of you considering Clomid but nervous about multiples. My RE said that it only increases the chances of multiples by 4% if you are only taking Clomid by itself.

Even though I would be a bit scared about handling twins (or more!) at this stage I think I would welcome having as many babies as I can before I have to quit from my difficulties!

Renee: Thats such a heartwrenching - but in its way beautiful - tale.

"I held her and she grasped my finger. I kissed her and she moved her mouth. Then all of a sudden IM being moved and my Dr. yelled that I was hemoraging and I needed to go in for emergency surgery. The nurse took her from me and gave her to my dh, I was rushed to the OR, and given a pen to sign a form and then a mask was shoved in my face. Next thing I knew I was back in my room, my dh was there with the baby. She had died in his hands 10 min. after I had her."

I don't even have the right words to express for that....so touching and yet sad. I have tears in my eyes. I understand now why even getting pregnant is far from the end of the line for you. You've been through so much, I don't know how you have coped. You are definitely much stronger than I. I feel selfish to want my no2 baby now....I would truely give up my chance if it means HE gives one to you this cycle! I really hopes so!

[BornAgainRenee]

Oh Sweetie I would never want that!! You have been through plenty yourself, as we all have, thats why we are here.
It was a beautiful moment, I just wish it was longer. I am thankful for her grasping my finger!! And for Daddy holding her while she passed, I believe she knew that she was loved very much.

Im praying we all get bfp's and that they are all sticky and that this will become no mans land and everyone will be pg, and happy! We can all dream!

Originally Posted by Mommy2Dakota

Renee: Thats such a heartwrenching - but in its way beautiful - tale.

"I held her and she grasped my finger. I kissed her and she moved her mouth. Then all of a sudden IM being moved and my Dr. yelled that I was hemoraging and I needed to go in for emergency surgery. The nurse took her from me and gave her to my dh, I was rushed to the OR, and given a pen to sign a form and then a mask was shoved in my face. Next thing I knew I was back in my room, my dh was there with the baby. She had died in his hands 10 min. after I had her."

I don't even have the right words to express for that....so touching and yet sad. I have tears in my eyes. I understand now why even getting pregnant is far from the end of the line for you. You've been through so much, I don't know how you have coped. You are definitely much stronger than I. I feel selfish to want my no2 baby now....I would truely give up my chance if it means HE gives one to you this cycle! I really hopes so!

[jencaz]

Oh my gosh ladies. Renee- I bow to you for having the strength you have. I have the ultimate respect for going through everything you have gone through and still sticking it out. I understand why though. You know it can happen, it's just a matter of when it will. I wish you the best of luck and baby dust!!

I wish everyone the most luck I can and DUST!!!