[FutrMomE]

<span style="color:blue">Hey everybody.
My name\'s Emily. I\'m 17 years old and due March 7, 2006. I told my boyfriend the news yesterday and he said he wants me to get an abortion. I know that since I\'m not having one, he is probably going to leave me with this responsibility alone. I just have to be strong and confident because I\'m determined to do whatever it takes to give this child a good life. My parents want me to get an abortion too. They aren\'t really angry, they just think I\'m going to "ruin my life" by keeping my baby. I don\'t have any friends to talk to either. I am a recovering crystal meth addict. If it weren\'t for my baby, I probably never would have stopped. All of my friends use dope and I know if I go around them I probably will too. So I decided it was best for me and my baby to completely cut off all contact with every friend I had. I know it\'s the right thing but I still feel so alone. Thanks for reading my rant girls!
Love,
Emily
EDD: March 7, 2006
FutrMomE@yahoo.com</span>

[Katty85]

Hi Emily. Just want you to know that Me and a lot of other girls will be here to listen to you and support you through your pregnancy. Im glad to hear that you have stoped doing cystal meth and have cut off contact with others that do it. Sorry to hear about your BF.

wishing you a happy and healthy pregnancy, and remember if you ever need to vent about anything that is what we are here for.
Good luck Katie

[Catahoula]

Hi Emily,

I was pregnant with my first at 17 and had him when I was 18. The worst thing that came out of it was his father and I staying together--we got married. I can't even begin to describe how that ruined my life. (By "that" I mean staying together/marrying) I know it's scary being that young, pregnant and on your own, but sometimes it works out for the best. Stay strong. Best of luck. (((Hugs)))

[KCM]

Ditto, to what Katty said.

We're here for you! PM me any time. BIG HUGS! Getting off meth and taking care of yourself and your baby is an accomplishment that is just so amazing. Stay strong!

Cheering for you

[Alice]

Hi Emily, and welcome to JM.

I'm Alice. I didn't get pregnant till I was 41, but I taught high school for 20 years and pop by here when I can.

I've got to tell you, after what I read, I admire you tremendously!! It's so hard to buck all the important people in your life for what you KNOW is right for you. And to overcome your addiction for the sake of your baby-- you've got to believe that this baby was sent to you for a very special reason.

Now: down to buisness:

You say your parents don't want you to keep the baby. Would you consider putting it up for adoption? If so, come to the Adoption board and we can talk.

As to your friends: You've got to know that there are zillions of wonderful people out there-- you just need to meet them. (Admittedly kind of hard while you're pregnant.) But why not look into some volunteer work? Find an area that interests you-- we can help-- and we'll find you a place to meet some wonderful people.

You didn't mention school-- are you heading into Senior year or did you just graduate-- or somewhere in between? If you're still in school, get in touch with a guidance counselor. (Maybe a bit difficult over the summer, but you could certainly leave a voice or e-mail message.) Let them know your status-- both in terms of pregnancy and your addiction. They'll work with you, to get you through academically and to try to get you into classes away from your old pals. If you've left school without a diploma, PLEASE speak to someone about a GED. It will substitute for a high school diploma. It will help you either get into a college (community colleges are realtively cheap) or will at least help you get a better job than those available to people without a diploma.

Why not look into parenting classes? You'll probably meet other young moms-to-be, and you'll be amazed at all you have in common with them, that you might not otherwise. You could do infant first aid or CPR, or any of a zillion others. Go online and start hunting.

The very best of luck to you, Emily. You're in a rough place right now, but think of how much brighter your future is now than it was 10 months or so ago. We're always here to talk-- this is a wonderful community of people from all over the world. TAke care, and let us know how you're doing and what we can do to help!

[Sour Amaretto]

and ditto to everything these ladies have said! Just know that we are here for you NO MATTER what decisions you make!! You can PM me if you ever need to talk!

BTW Welcome to JM! Im Kelly and im 19 and just had a little girl 5 months ago...Hope you enjoy it here and have a safe healthy pregnancy!

[MommaDucks]

(((HUGS))) and welcome! ditto on evertyhing that was said, your always welcom here!!!

[rhythmicFASHION]

Oh wow, I really hope everything works out for you. I'm 15&about four months pregnant with my first baby. I won't be 15 until December, a couple weeks after the baby is born. The baby's father is 17, and although he is supportive (most of the time) it does make it a little big harder to struggle with being in a relationship&taking care of yourself. Between keeping him happy, keeping myself healthy for the baby, and keeping my family happy -- I barely have any time to just sit down&have a stressfree nap. What I'm trying to say, is even if things don't work out with your boyfriend, maybe you're better off. It will allow you more time to yourself&to handle your own problems than worry about his too. Of course, it's natural to miss him&wish he was here to take part, but there is always little things we wish we could change about people that just aren't possible. Try keeping a little journal that you can write in as the pregnancy progresses, occupy yourself with some arts&crafts, or like some other posts say -- try to find a hobby. Just because you're pregnant&alone right now, doesn't mean it's the end of your life. Go out there&make some new friends while you can. I lost a lot of my own too when people started discovering I was pregnant. As for your parents -- they will come around. I told mine awhile ago, and although I know they're still disappointed in me, I know they'll stand by me through the decisions I make.

Congratulations&I really hope things work out for you,
Erin

[dawsonsmom]

Welcome! I am 15 and just had a baby boy a month ago. I know how hard it is be going through all of this at such a young age but I did it. Im glad that you decided not to get an abortion. That option was told to me to by alot of people but I knew I didnt and wasnt going to do that. My boyfriend smokes alot of weed and drinks alot so I understand kind of what you are going through with your friends and stuff. I just quit hanging around those people too. My boyfriend continued to do it and still does sometimes. After our son was born though, he didnt do it as much. About 2 weeks ago I finally told him that I was going to leave he if continued doing that all the time. I dont want my child around that and it sounds like you are the same way. Well good luck with everything and welcome to the board!

[Jynnie-Pooh]

Congrats on your pregnancy...I was just stopping by to see what was new and I viewed your post. You are NOT alone so don't feel that way. Even though all the ladies here are not there with you physically alot of them know what you are going through and are very supportive. I am happy to hear that your child has impacted your life enough to make you stop crystal meth. If your bf doesn't want to take responsibility well that is his loss ultimately because you will be pleased to have a child. Also you are not ruining your life, just taking a little detour. Anyhoo, good luck and if you ever need to vent, whatever, PM me.
Ruthann

[momma06]

Hey,
Sorry you're going through a tough time. My whole family wanted me to get an abortion too because it's gonna ruin my life. They pushed it everyday for weeks and then they finally stepped aside because they saw that I wasn't goin to change my mind so now I'm happy because I have support. Just hang in there and you'll get support too. And for the friends issue, go find new ones that are clean and stay away from dope. Maybe your boyfriend will change his mind about the abortion thing too. That'd be awesome. Good luck with everything!

[mommyofdani]

Congratulations on your pregnancy. As Alice also said, I admire your strength. You may not realize it, but you are one of the most mature people I have ever had the pleasure to talk to. You are not alone though. We may not physically be around, but every single woman on this website is here for you. You have over 4000 friends here, most who are or who have been in similar situations as you. You have gotten some wonderful advice here. Good luck. Please visit us here as much as you can, let us know how you are doing.

Btw...my name is Ashley, 20, and I have a little girl Danielle, 14 mos. Feel free to pm anytime you need to.

[JGoldinger]

Hey Girl I DEFFINATLY wanted to post and tell you this.

I am Jennifer I am 18 and i have a baby boy Named Robert who is a month and a half.

Before you say you are alone i want you to read this...

I got pregnant last year. I didnt find out till i was almost 12 weeks pregnant simply cause i didnt want to know. So i told my BF first and she was great. The next person that i decided to tell was the boyfriend i thought so highly about. Well he said lets wait and hear from the doctor. I said ok. So one day i go to work and i am trying to get ahold of him. This is after i found out i was for sure and he told me that i HAD to get an abortion. And that was the last time him and i actually talked. He left me then and there. THroughout my pregnancy he tried to contact me just to call me bad names... and guess what now i have nothing to deal with him and i would DIE if i did have some thing to do with him cause my baby boy does not need a man like him in his life. I dont regret that decision at all well i have to het off he is awake i will pm you later!

i was prenant for a month before my 18th birthday. my older siblings wanted me to have an abortion but i dont believe in that, we told my parents on their birthday... that wasnt when we wanted to tell them but the cat kinda jump out of the bag when i couldnt make up a lie to explain my morning sickness. my parents were disappointed for like 15 minutes and then my mom decided we had to get married right there but i wanted to plan my wedding so my bf/finace' got married when i was 5 months pregnant in november. now that i have my baby girl i wouldnt have done anything different. she was born in apirl. i will be turning 19 next month. i will be going back to school(college) in the net year or so.

Our little bundle of joy has brought together my husband and his father . my family has been there to support me after a couple months of lectures. now we are just one big happy family.

[queenamy]

I just wanted to let you know that I think it's SOOO great of you so stop using drugs and hanging out with those people that did... it just shows what a great mommy you are ALREADY and i'm glad abortion is NOT on your list!

[dakota05_logan08]

I'm 19 years old and there's 2 possibilities of a father...one said "abortion" and the other is saying it's not his...I'm with neither one of them and have no contact with either...I want my baby to have contact with the real father but the more I think about it the less I want my baby to be raised around someone like that...One of them is 20 and does drugs and the other is 25 and already has 2 kids that he doesn't want to support...when I first found out I was like you and felt so alone but I made the best out of it and decided that this was all happening for a reason...I quit hanging out with my old friends that were bad influences and weren't safe for me to be around and made new friends...I have now found someone who is willing to be with me for who I am and also wants to be a part of the baby's life...just keep your head up and follow your insticts and do what's best for you and the baby and everything will turn out just fine...I think you're going to be a wonderful mother considering you're already realizing the things you need to do to keep your baby safe....congratulations on getting off crystal meth I know it's a hard thing to do but it's awesome you're thinking of the baby...Good luck and Congratulations on your pregnancy...Everything will work out fine just keep making the right decisions! If you ever need someone to talk to my yahoo screen name is adidas43_1999@yahoo.com...feel free to PM me anytime I would love to talk with you!

[~*kath*~]

Welcome to JM,, I'm glad you found us because this is a great place for support. I think you are going to be a great mommy,, it shows already because you completely turned your life around. I think its a great idea to get involved in parenting classes or prenatal classes, where you can meet others whoa re just like you so you can make new friends. I think even though it will be sad to leave your old friends its a good idea for you and your baby. I hope your b/f comes around and loves this child as much as you do, it would be nice for the baby to have a father in its life, but if that isn't going to work than I am confident you can do it on your own. Congrats on your pregnancy *hugs*

[mommyangie]

Hi Emily. I'm one of the older moms on the boards. I wanted to also let you know that you are not alone. The fact that you have done all that you have to get off the drugs and are admitting you can handle this without your boyfriend is very strong. I know you can do it because where there's a will, there IS definitely a way. You sound like you have a sound mind and you know what you are getting yourself in to.

If you need some support and want to find others to hang around with I would suggest calling the local social services and they will probably know how to hook you up with a non-profit group that helps teen moms by having group gatherings and social type things. I once volunteered at such a place in my late 20's and it was great. The girls had a blast getting together with their babies and talking and hanging out with other pregnant moms-to-be and new moms.

It is important for you to be around those that are going through what you are going through (or have been through it). It's like that for any age, not just because you are a single teen mom. I was a single adult mom and needed the support and still do at this point in my life. My childless friends had no idea what it was like for me so I needed support from others with kids. It looks like you have lots of support here so hopefully you will be back soon to update.

[KMichelle24]

You're alone by no means...I'm 18 and have only been out of high school for a month. I moved in with my boyfriend right after but I still had to deal with telling my family, his and all of my friends...it seemed like they were just making a disaster out of a beautiful situation but only a week or so passed before I got phone calls telling me they bought some things for the baby A few of my friends (especially my few with kids themselves) have stuck by my side close but the majority of them either don't understand or are too caught up in "being young" to be there for me...I've come to the realization that it doesn't matter...there are millions of women across the globe who know what I...and you...are going through and who can offer so many words of support. You're so amazingly strong and mature to have given up such a horrible addiction for the well being of your baby, and to realize that you had to get away from dangerous people before the baby comes along...this proves that you love your baby and I personally think it proves you'll be a wonderful mother Just hang in there and as so many mothers have told me...in a few years you'll wonder how you ever did without. let me know if I can help at all and good luck!

hi Emily!

It must be a very hard time for you.

Not only do you have lots of pressure to get an abortion, but you are also recovering for drug abuse!

We are here for you.

Please come to us fist before you go to Crystal Meth. You don't want you loving baby to get hurt for the drugs. I used to do pot all the time, but as soon as i found out I was pregnant, I stopped cold turkey. I also smoked cigerrets, but I quit that cold turkey too. I am sure you can too!

good luck!

Remember we are here to support you in every way possible!!!