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  #1  
November 19th, 2008, 12:39 PM
sara~b's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Pittsburgh PA
Posts: 10,350
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I posted a while ago about meeting this really great guy. His name was Dan and he is an engineer that lives near me, building his own house, blah, blah, blah. Well I caught him using a dating site. He said some girl emailed him asking him about his jeep. Whatever, fine. Then he told me he was getting on there last night. I had my neighbor set up a profile on the site because she has a jeep and loves them too and she's really pretty. She added him as a 'favorite' on there to see what he would do. Well wouldn't you know he sent her an email telling her how pretty she was and how cool she seemed and blah blah blah. I'm done. Positively done. I'm better off alone. I can't play this game anymore....
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Sara, 27, married to Shane, 31, mom to Gemma, 6, and Ashlyn, born 8/7/10







Running for my health and sanity!
PR's: 5k-25:05 (old PR 25:10), 5M-45:03 (old PR - 47:22), 10k - 52:00 (approximate - training), HM-2:25:58 (ran a 2:17:36 during marathon), Full- 4:49:25 (old PR -5:49:40), 50k-7:05:56, 50M-13:31:14, 100k- 18:59:31 (old PR 20:56)
(All of these PR's are going down this season!)

My Pregnancy Chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1c6297
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  #2  
November 19th, 2008, 12:45 PM
LisanAndy's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Hagerstown, MD
Posts: 23,058
Ughh men can be such jerks!!! I'm sorry hun ((HUGS))
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  #3  
November 19th, 2008, 12:48 PM
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I'm sorry There are a lot of cruddy men out there. Just try to continue to keep your standards high girl! I don't know how I lucked out with Dustin. I think b/c I am a difficult person to deal with sometimes, so the losers didn't even bother
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  #4  
November 19th, 2008, 12:49 PM
LaLaRose3's Avatar My brand of heroin.
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 12,226
Aw, girl. Men really stink sometimes. *HUGS*
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  #5  
November 19th, 2008, 12:53 PM
sara~b's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Pittsburgh PA
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Thanks girls! I'm really not that upset. I had a feeling. But honestly, I'm so bitter and jaded anymore that dating just isn't gonna work even if I find a nice guy. I'm done dating for a LOONG time. I need to rebuild my trust in humanity, which at this point, is nil.
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Sara, 27, married to Shane, 31, mom to Gemma, 6, and Ashlyn, born 8/7/10







Running for my health and sanity!
PR's: 5k-25:05 (old PR 25:10), 5M-45:03 (old PR - 47:22), 10k - 52:00 (approximate - training), HM-2:25:58 (ran a 2:17:36 during marathon), Full- 4:49:25 (old PR -5:49:40), 50k-7:05:56, 50M-13:31:14, 100k- 18:59:31 (old PR 20:56)
(All of these PR's are going down this season!)

My Pregnancy Chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1c6297
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  #6  
November 19th, 2008, 01:11 PM
*Anna*'s Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: South Carolina
Posts: 5,335
Oh I've been there. just when i was about to swear off men, I started hanging out with DH. We were friends first, knew each other in a friendly way, and then it progressed to more.

So hang in there girl... most of us have been there... and you will find someone!
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  #7  
November 19th, 2008, 01:35 PM
sara~b's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Quote:
Oh I've been there. just when i was about to swear off men, I started hanging out with DH. We were friends first, knew each other in a friendly way, and then it progressed to more.

So hang in there girl... most of us have been there... and you will find someone![/b]
No, honestly at this point every guy that talks to me is suspect. I work with ALL men. Welders, pipefitters, laborers, heavy-equipment operators, etc. I listen to them talk and know exactly what they all say they are looking for, sex, someone to cook and clean, etc. Then they have the gall to ask me out and I turn everyone of them down because I'm confident they don't like me for ME, they only want one thing. I go to the bar and when a guy offers to buy me a drink I always have the feeling he's trying to get me drunk to take me home. My daughter's father cheated on me (I can't prove it, but I know he did at least emotionally cheat), my ex after him cheated (I found condoms in his coat), my ex after that one cheated (his best friend told me and when I confronted the girl she admitted it), Zack did not cheat that I know of but he was emotionally unavailable and treated me like a slave, then Dan is at the very least TRYING to cheat if he didn't already. After this, I just can't put my heart back out there. I feel sick at the thought of trusting ANYONE. I would rather be alone then take the chance again. The next guy might be the one that brings something home and leaves me an unpleasant parting gift. I won't take that chance with my emotional, physical and mental health. I'm DONE. Absolutely done. Not that I won't look for company once in awhile for a nice dinner or a movie but I am not trusting my heart or body to another man any time in the foreseeable future.
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Sara, 27, married to Shane, 31, mom to Gemma, 6, and Ashlyn, born 8/7/10







Running for my health and sanity!
PR's: 5k-25:05 (old PR 25:10), 5M-45:03 (old PR - 47:22), 10k - 52:00 (approximate - training), HM-2:25:58 (ran a 2:17:36 during marathon), Full- 4:49:25 (old PR -5:49:40), 50k-7:05:56, 50M-13:31:14, 100k- 18:59:31 (old PR 20:56)
(All of these PR's are going down this season!)

My Pregnancy Chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1c6297
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  #8  
November 19th, 2008, 02:10 PM
Mars's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Barbados
Posts: 18,988


Sometimes you do need to take a little time to yourself to regroup and then go again. You will find a nice guy but I think that you're doing a good thing to take a break and then go again. Otherwise you may meet a nice guy but because of the other jerks you've dated, you may jeopardize it by thinking that he'd be the same way, etc. So if you take a little time to clear your head and your feelings and then go again, it may not be so bad.
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  #9  
November 19th, 2008, 04:12 PM
CherryFrog1926's Avatar Mega Super Mommy
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Location: Rosemount, MN
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I"m sorry sweetie I know EXACTLY how you feel. it's sucks and i dont think i can trust anyone either. as soon as i meet them things start to fly in my head. i finally completly ended things with Rob since he's been gone cause after he left i unpacked some stuff of his and put on a sweater and what do you know 2 condoms in the pocket. he swears his friend wore it last but it wouldnt fit his friend. Anyway sorry for jacking ur post. but i know how u feel. hugs!
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mom to 5 little bugs RJ, Austin, AJ, Bry,& Robby
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  #10  
November 19th, 2008, 05:10 PM
Alison81's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Sep 2005
Location: New York
Posts: 7,593
Oh, I am SO there, right with you! I am sick of my friends saying, oh, you'll find the man of your dreams who will give you the world, not all men are like that, and I think it's all bull you know what!

I even had my friend's DH hit on me, and ask me to spend the night with him recently. She goes on and on about how wonderful he is, he is always taking care of her, and telling her he loves her, and being romantic, but when he asked me to spend the night I was convinced, there are NO good men. I don't care if someone says their DH is great, I don't believe it. A lot of the mothers of the kids where I work, have recently become single due to their DH's leaving them, or have DH's that have cheated on them. My own dad cheated. And I know Dom was talking to other girls when we were together. I think the main reason he broke up with me was because he got bored with me.

I know the feeling, and I am more comfortable being single. I started seeing a guy recently, and then two days later I saw him out with the mom of his two kids, and they were holding hands.....which means I was his, on the side, girl. It was then that I decided I don't care about finding "the one". I am going out, dating, having fun, but it would have to be someone pretty darn amazing to make me consider more, LOL. I am enjoying spending time with my girls a lot more.
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  #11  
November 20th, 2008, 02:05 PM
sara~b's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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Location: Pittsburgh PA
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Thanks Ali and USMA. I know I'm not alone. I'm actually going on a date tomorrow and considering asking a guy I met on our job site out. I just don't want a relationship in any sense, physical or emotional. I am not going to turn down companionship but I pretty much have my mind made up that there's not much a guy could do to convince me to 'be' with him. My trust is absolutely shattered and I actually feel kind of good about that. I think I've always been TOO trusting. Maybe now I'll be alot more careful of who I waste my time on.
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Sara, 27, married to Shane, 31, mom to Gemma, 6, and Ashlyn, born 8/7/10







Running for my health and sanity!
PR's: 5k-25:05 (old PR 25:10), 5M-45:03 (old PR - 47:22), 10k - 52:00 (approximate - training), HM-2:25:58 (ran a 2:17:36 during marathon), Full- 4:49:25 (old PR -5:49:40), 50k-7:05:56, 50M-13:31:14, 100k- 18:59:31 (old PR 20:56)
(All of these PR's are going down this season!)

My Pregnancy Chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1c6297
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  #12  
November 21st, 2008, 09:36 AM
soImarriedAnerd's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Depends on the day....Earth :D
Posts: 28,954
I was there at one point. I swore off them all. I didn't date for over a year. Then one day I finally just jumped back into the pool. I think I needed that year to figure WHAT exactly I wanted.....I'm I knew but the year I was able to focus on me and it made me realize I didn't need someone to complete me--I had become a full person on my own. I wanted someone to complimented me instead. And thats what I ended up with. Take whatever time you need, sometimes giving up isn't really giving up---its more getting what you need . {{{HUGGLES}}}

And whats with engineers and dating sites! Thats how I caught troy cheating on me also-stupid things!
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  #13  
November 21st, 2008, 02:07 PM
sara~b's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
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OMG Angela! Troy cheated on you?!?! How did you get through it? What happened? Would you mind PM'ing me to talk? I completely dismissed Dan because he was back on the dating site we met through. I guess I'm wondering if they just still like to look or if it leads to more. God my head is screwed up!
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Sara, 27, married to Shane, 31, mom to Gemma, 6, and Ashlyn, born 8/7/10







Running for my health and sanity!
PR's: 5k-25:05 (old PR 25:10), 5M-45:03 (old PR - 47:22), 10k - 52:00 (approximate - training), HM-2:25:58 (ran a 2:17:36 during marathon), Full- 4:49:25 (old PR -5:49:40), 50k-7:05:56, 50M-13:31:14, 100k- 18:59:31 (old PR 20:56)
(All of these PR's are going down this season!)

My Pregnancy Chart: http://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/1c6297
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  #14  
November 22nd, 2008, 06:32 AM
soImarriedAnerd's Avatar Platinum Supermommy
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Depends on the day....Earth :D
Posts: 28,954
Sending you a pm. But yeah everyone of my ex's and even troy have cheated on me. I guess I'm just that girl who dates those men. But I don't have any role models either-I bet 90% of the people I know have cheated on a SO at one point. It sucks because I have never done it but I always have it done to me, I don't know if I would even know how to have a relationship with someone who hadn't cheated on me because I have never got to try it.
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