[♥Ashley♥]

Ever since Jason and I got engaged he took on a second job AND a ton of sidework (he is an electrician, and does alot of jobs on the side for people who dont want to pay the way HIGH markups of electrical companies). He wanted to make as much money as he could before the wedding so that we can do all of the things we want to do. Ive offered a million times for me to get a second job but he always tells me no. He wants to give me my dream wedding, not have me work extra hard for it (as far as money goes). We have no one helping us at all its me and him paying for what will turn out to be a really expensive wedding....all in 5.5 months time. We dont like to ask for help and we'll be very proud when its all said and done that we paid for it, but right now its hard putting 100% of our extra money towards the wedding. Anyways, my poor fiance is working his BUTT off. I cant wait until September when he quits all this extra stuff. He works Monday through friday at his normal job 6:00am-3:00pm then goes to his night job from 4:30-10:30pm not really on a set schedule but mostly Wednesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, & Sundays. THEN on his off days, he is squeezing in side work. Like this weekend he only has Saturday night and Sunday morning off and he is working a side job both days. He has been working about 90-110 hours PER WEEK! I LOVE this man He is not a complainer, and ive never heard him complain...but just this morning he said "im tired, this is catching up with me" He is doing this for me, so I need to do something for him. But what can I do? I have no clue! I want to get him something or take him somewhere when he has a couple of hours off, but I just dont know what to do. If you knew my fiance you would know it takes ALOT for him to say im tired, he is the most driven man I know and never ever ever complains...he gets done what needs to be done and the fact that he said that he was getting tired breaks my heart! What can I do?? He wont quit anything, he wants to work for our wedding. So I dont know! All he is doing is work, eat, sleep...he needs a break!

[*krista*]

That is so incredibly sweet of him. I mean really, he must be a great guy and is definitely a hard worker! Honestly though, I think he probably gets satisfaction out of the thought that he is giving you your dream wedding, so I don't know that it would be a good idea for you to go and get another job. I know it would make sense logically, but emotionally it sounds like it is really important to him to be able to do this for you. It wouldn't hurt to sit him down and talk to him about it, though!

[♥Ashley♥]

yea, he is soooooo incredibly sweet. Yea, he definitely doesnt want me to get a job, hes made that very obvious. I just want to do something for him and i dont know what! Like get him something he'll enjoy on his time off or take him somewhere fun, he just needs to relax he deserves it!!! I just dont know what to get (or do!) and yes, he is the hardest worker i know! I love that about him. I actually was just talking about this over in ttc#1 today in this economy if he were to lose his job, he wouldnt think twice about it he would get up off his butt and go get a fast food job just to keep our house and the things we have, even if it meant getting 3 or 4 different jobs...he would do it, and work his butt off and never complain!

[szczepanski]

What about surprising him with his favorite meal and his favorite movie? If he is so tired...it sounds like some down time in PJ's, a yummy home cooked meal and curling up on the couch to see his favorite move would be great unwinding time!

[CandaceDianne]

I bet he would enjoy staying home and relaxing. Maybe while he off to work one day, start cooking a realllly nice meal, so its just about done when he gets home and have a super sexy outfit on (with heels!) while you are putting on the finishing touches for dinner. Have some dinner, have some fun, and take a nice, loooooong, warm bubble bath together. I think that would be just what he would want (now, obviously I dont know him like you do ). This way, he doesn't have to leave the house (because he is gone all week), and he can just relax while you tease and pamper him!
Also, make sure the lights are dim with some candles. Wait on him so he doesnt have to hardly move. Grab some wine (or beer or whatever your preference is) so he can fully relax.

[freesiangel]

He is such a sweetie.

I will say, whatever you choose to do for him I'd make sure it's basically free. I certainly wouldn't take him out somewhere that costs money because he's doing all this extra work so that all the extra money can go toward the wedding. Do you live by any nice state parks? Maybe just a day of hiking, fishing, etc. and bringing a nice picnic w/ some wine and stuff would be enjoyable. Or give him coupons for backrubs, foot rubs, "other" stuff , etc.

Or instead of getting another job, you could work on ways to cut back on expenses over the next few months? Like saving money on groceries, insisting you don't eat out very much, etc. I'm sure those kinds of acts wouldn't go unnoticed.

[♥Ashley♥]

Originally Posted by freesiangel

He is such a sweetie.

I will say, whatever you choose to do for him I'd make sure it's basically free. I certainly wouldn't take him out somewhere that costs money because he's doing all this extra work so that all the extra money can go toward the wedding. Do you live by any nice state parks? Maybe just a day of hiking, fishing, etc. and bringing a nice picnic w/ some wine and stuff would be enjoyable. Or give him coupons for backrubs, foot rubs, "other" stuff , etc.

Or instead of getting another job, you could work on ways to cut back on expenses over the next few months? Like saving money on groceries, insisting you don't eat out very much, etc. I'm sure those kinds of acts wouldn't go unnoticed.

Yea, I was thinking it should be something free for that reason. thats why its so hard to think of something! I think to start off ill just grab a movie and cook his favorite meal (pot roast with potatoes and carrots in the crock pot-easy!) and have it all ready when he gets home tomorrow night from work. He is also a clean FREAK and hates not having time to scrub the toilets and stuff ( weird for a guy, right?) so ill try and clean during the day tomorrow too! I just want him to be able to sit back and relax on his time off and not be doing the things he hasnt had time for.

[CandaceDianne]

Ashley: BTW I LOVE LOVE LOVE your shoes on your blog!!!!

[Resi]

Wow! You are a very lucky girl. You DF sounds like the best ever. I'm thinking when he has that little time off he wants to be home relaxing with you. I know the two of you got a new boat. What about something related to that?

[♥Ashley♥]

Thanks Candace!!

Yea, Resi we got a new boat. He loves that thing...hmmm it would be fun to take it out and then camp at one of the sand bars (hes been wanting to do that) but he never has any time off! Maybe I can call his work and request off for him man, I would love to do that to have some time with him!

I guess its all boiling down to just staying home and relaxing....I just wanted to do something special and different but you guys are right he probably just wants to lounge at home.

[Mod-LadyCoconut]

I agree that with him being tired he probably just wants to stay home. My all time favorite thing is coming home and DH has spent the day cleaning up around the house and if your DF really likes things neat and proper than I think the best thing you could fo for him is cook, look extra cute and have the house looking great. Best part is you'll both enjoy it and it's free. I'm sure you already do but be sure to thank him all the time for the wedding. What a great guy!

[soImarriedAnerd]

Welllllllll......I'm a naughty girl so I was thinking of free stuff---but naughty stuff. Any fun fantasies you could create? you know BJs are like flowers for men!

Maybe I can call his work and request off for him man, I would love to do that to have some time with him!

A friend of mine just did that for her Dh's birthday. She showed up to his work at 11:30, told him she had gotten a co-worker to put in a request off slip and forged his name, and that they had until 5pm to do whatever they wanted! HE LOVED IT and brags to everyone who will listen.

I'd say make his favorite dinners, maybe rent/netflix some DVDs he really wants to see so when he does get time to chill, he can enjoy it.

And well, Angela's always got the right idea